Friends Wedding

[Abcdef1277]

Hi all, I’ve name changed as my other name is quite outing.
A friend of mine is getting married in a few months time. We used to be extremely close but due to living not as close anymore and growing up and having families etc we’re not as close as we once was.
The invites came out a while ago and I straight away rsvp’d to say we would love to come meaning myself dh and ds.
I have now found out that children are not invited, which is fair enough I know that some times your limited for numbers or you only want family children there, that’s all fine I’m not upset or anything maybe just a little disappointed as I wanted to go as a family.
It turns out there is a festival on the same weekend that my dh desperately wants to go to (I do to) an we would take ds.
AIBU in saying sorry to my friend an not go an just go to the festival?

If you'd rather go to the festival then go, but going only because ds isn't invited is a bit pathetic.
Going to both and not taking dh is a compromise but tbh I think you should honour your commitment first and foremost.

Generally I would say YABU to accept & then change your mind, but as DS is not invited, go to the festival.

OP you can't feel resentful of the children they've invited, they're paying!
We had only our niece and nephew at the ceremony (flower girl and page boy) and said children were welcome in the evening.

I too am invited to a wedding (in September !) Save the date was a family one. They've since decided that space is an issue so would rather children didn't come. Cue mild disappointment as will miss DD

BUT I wouldn't miss it for the world. The bride has attended children's parties and christenings for me. I'm really looking forward to her special day.

you are being very unreasonable. This is not the only weekend you have an opportunity to spend as a family.

She needs better friends.

I wouldn't be best pleased if I were the bride.

We come as a family. Ffs! What are you, joined at the hip? Go to your precious festival and let the bride and groom invite some of their real friends in your place.

Hope you don't need your friend in the future because you're showing her exactly how much she's worth to you and it ain't a lot.

YABU to accept and then choose to go to a festival. You don't come across with much value on your friendship.

And the no children invited isn't good enough reason to justify your decision. If you had a new born baby, that would be a different case.

Am i the only one who used to receive invites minus children when they were little and shout 'yay

No, that’s also me. We rarely get any time just as a couple, it was 5 years before we were able to have a night away.

I enjoy just being me and DH rather than Mummy and Daddy for a night. Being able to drink, catch up with my friends, stay up late and dance. Rather than having to follow my DC around, make sure they have enough to drink, eat, no toilet accidents, stop them being bored/keeping them quiet, and constantly entertain them whilst DH and I don’t talk to each other or talk to our friends and be mindful about not drinking much and knowing one of us will probably be going to bed early.

I miss them obviously if we are at a wedding, but I know they’re having fun with their grandparents.

I really don’t understand this ‘we come as a family’. Only when it suits you, as you’re happy to go to other things without your DS.

If you want to cancel then do it sooner than later. If your d's wasn't named on the invitation then you presumed and should have checked before accepting.

Do you know for certain your other friend's d's is invited and they haven't just presumed too? Are they in the bridal party?