To not want to work for £3.58 an hour?

[DontHaveAGoPlease]

Going to get absolutely flamed for this!

I'm a single mum to 1, in regards to UC, I get the equivalent to a monthly full time wage this includes CM.

If I go back to work for 22 hours a week, I will be effectively earning the above an hour.

Do I just suck it up or wait for my DS to get his 15 Hours free??

I am desperate to work but I'd hate to look back and regret outsourcing my childcare all for the above. Shall I just suck it up and go for it or suck it up and look after my ds??

I've already braced myself for the flaming!

OP, I separated from H about 3 years ago. Mum to 3 kids, I was desperate to work but it took me some time to find my feet. I volunteered and did a full time course for about a year before getting into FTW. (I had a 3,5,7 y/o)
When I didn't work, I had my rent paid, my council tax,tax credits and IS.
I was pretty comfortable!

Then I started work! My rent went down to pretty much nothing and was so complicated to sort out i just stopped it altogether. (£650)
My council tax help stopped altogether (I now pay £120 a month)
My childcare is £600 a month (thats with 2 in school and one with 30 free house nursery!!)
I now get about £500 to help with nursery fees but nothing else.

On top of this I commute to work every day so have petrol and other expenses.

I earn £920 a month for 32 hours!

You work out the sums!
Do I blame you?
absolutelY not!

You work out the sums!

I can only work because their dad is on a very good salary and helps out quite a lot.
If he didn't it would be impossible for me to work.

so if you do 22 hours a week, you're 78.76 per week better off than you would be if you didn't work?

22 hours a week is what, 3 days? 3 days in nursery will be good for your child. If it was 40-50 hours in childcare under age 3, I'd see your point but 22 hours for nearly £80 more? You should do it, not because of benefits yadda yah but because it's more money for you, and it's not enough daycare time to be any sort of problem for your child.

Also, even minimum wage jobs can have prospects if you move up to supervisor etc, even without, I'd be more likely to employ someone with a recent work history than not, so may help you when you're moving onto the next job.

It's not your ex's fault you don't work that solely lies with you.

If you really wanted to work as you said you wouldn't even be asking the question. I suspect the response you actually wanted was for people to say was it's fine to let other tax payers keep you whilst you do nothing.

For me it was security. Benefits can stop, be changed where wages are mine as iv earned them

I don't understand your calculations but nobody should work if it means being worse off. Especially with a baby.

The job I've been offered has 0 progression, I won't get any further than I start in

In honesty in your shoes I'd focus on trying to get a job with some progression opportunities. Or where you will gain skills for stepping up later. Even if the salary never gets high, you will have more job security and flexibility once you have moved up a few rungs, and hopefully a job you can do long-term.

If this job could help with applying for something better in future I'd do it, if not I'd spend my time trying to improve my CV for something better esp when I qualified for the funded hours.

In my area you can receive free career counselling via NHS. Also the Children's Centres fund some free courses for parents (with a free crèche). And the libraries offer heavily subsidised evening courses, if you have any family who can look after your child.

A poster above mentions McDonalds as a dead end job, but actually McDonald's do have a tradition of encouraging junior employees to move up and offering education and mentoring.

So I should have to pick up the entire slack my ex has decided not to?

Yet quite happy to let other tax payers do it...

He's paying CM as per your opening post so he's actually doing more than you yet apparently he's the bad guy. You chose to have a child, nobody forced you.

Twenty two hours is barely anything to work. It shouldn't ever be an option not too.

I wrote the above NOT to encourage staying on benefits but to highlight the costs involved in going back to work for parents in lower incomes.
I work because I enjoy what I do, I enjoy being part of something and feel I have earned my way. I want my children to follow this example even though it means less time with them.
It's not easy. I'm tired and sometimes stressed but we have a routine.
In your situation I'd wait until you can get your free hours and start work when you can be comfortable.
I don't see why people are flaming you if it's not a long term option which you clearly state it is not.

Fuck that OP, it’s what benefits are for.

For those who could work but don't want to? Fuck off.

...it’s the likes of Google and Starbucks aggressively avoiding tax that concerns me

Hurrah! Just 2mins 8secs after I said that someone would blame Starbucks!

Surely it only depends if you can afford it? If you don't need that 3.58 an hour, then don't do it? But if you do need it, then you'll just have to do it. Lots of people are in the same situation

"The benefits of working are cumulative as wages rise, you get bonuses, you get a pension, you get childcare vouchers, you get tax free allowances. After a few years you would actually be financially better off if you worked."

FFS Duchy. It doesn't work like that in lowpaid jobs. Haven't you read the posts pointing that out.

The actual wage is not £3.58, taking away childcare and other costs and stating that the rate is £3.58 is not accurate. Choosing to work based on this assumption is therefore that - a choice. The argument about missing milestones in children's lives is a different argument.

And this is why people get pissed off with welfare people
Making choices not to work not working should only be those who can’t not those who don’t want to

May women earn nothing after child care nothing

I don’t see what milestones you’d miss by working 22 hours a week. I don’t agree that a dead end job has no prospects at all - easier to get another job when you have a job, easier to bid your wages/conditions up from there when you move.

And this is why people get pissed off with welfare people

What does that even mean, ‘welfare people*?

OP, do whatever feels good to you. There's nothing wrong with being a sahm. It's your call.

Choosing to be a sahp is a choice in itself, justifying this through the wage which takes into account the childcare confuses the argument. All parents are faced with similar decisions - do you work or not. It is a matter of choice and each person makes that choice dependant on their on views and opinions.

If only Starbucks and amazon would pay their taxes, then clearly none of us would have to work!

OP, if you genuinely want to work then I think you could manage 22 hours and being £70-odd quid better off after childcare (if I've understood the calculations). However if you'd rather live off benefits, clearly there's nothing stopping you, why do you need validation from here?

not working should only be those who can’t not those who don’t want to
There are an awful lot of wealthy people who could work but choose not to. Why should anyone have to work if they don't need the money?

May women earn nothing after child care nothing
Why are they working for nothing? Seems pointless to work if you're no better off.

I’d wait for the free childcare. Your child is still young and by the sounds of it you wouldn’t be in the position you are if it wasn’t for your ex lying to you. I’d take this time to enjoy your child as much as possible and work when they are in the free childcare. Benefits are there to help and it sounds like you need it so use it while you do. Ignore some of the ones on here, they are too harsh and have to realise everyone is different and handles things differently. Do what is best for you.

Choosing not to work or work with regard to benefits applies to everyone not just those with children. We all have a choice as to how much and how little we work (dependant on job availability) and how much benefit of support we may recurve from family. Some people make a choice to work part time based on lifestyle and income, others full time, others not at all.

Why should I have to subsidise you staying off with your child when i have to leave mine??

Exactly.

A one year old doesn't need independent socialization. 🙄
Please ignore the benefit bashers op and do what is right for you and your dc. Interesting that the mental health of the mother is top priority in the bf/ff debate but on sahm/wohm it matters not one jot.

If I was in your shoes (and obsviously not..) if I could manage in the benefits you were getting I would find some kind of training, course or degree to complete between now and when your DC is school aged. You really need to understand that the financial and work circumstances won’t change on their own and you’ve got to be responsible for them - even if they’re not you fault.

If you can do this your position will be better, you can commence a career at the “right time” ( DC will be at school) and invest more in it, your won’t have to worry about the “benefit bashers” - you’ll end up paying back more than you get, you’ll set you and DC up for a great future and show DC what can be done without a useless man.

Best of luck but I wouldn’t be signing up for a crap job when there are better options.

Also stop listening to those in your life who want to keep you in your place I.e. you have to stay home with your poor DC. You can do better than this.

So I should have to pick up the entire slack my ex has decided not to??

No you SHOULDN'T have to. That doesn't change the fact you DO have to. Don't punish yourself bc your useless ex isn't helping - he probably never will. Better to be doing well on your own two feet than moaning for the rest of your life that he should have done more.