To not want to work for £3.58 an hour?

[DontHaveAGoPlease]

Going to get absolutely flamed for this!

I'm a single mum to 1, in regards to UC, I get the equivalent to a monthly full time wage this includes CM.

If I go back to work for 22 hours a week, I will be effectively earning the above an hour.

Do I just suck it up or wait for my DS to get his 15 Hours free??

I am desperate to work but I'd hate to look back and regret outsourcing my childcare all for the above. Shall I just suck it up and go for it or suck it up and look after my ds??

I've already braced myself for the flaming!

So I should have to pick up the entire slack my ex has decided not to??

I wasn't sure about keeping my DS, he told me it would be fine, he'd always be there, not to worry.

Here I am. No I shouldn't just suck it up

Don't know. But 22 hours isn't a lot. You can still spend quite a lot of time with your child. It may be worth while to have extra cash if you wish, I think.

but 22 hours is three days. you would still have your income heavily subsidised but at least it is a start. And you would still have 4 days at home with your DS. I don't get the problem.

but one this is obvious. not are not desperate to work. You are desperate to make excuses not to work.

most parents work 5 days a week and this is normal. Not even wanting to do 3 days a week is just lazy.

I work 5 days a week despite having a severely disabled child to care for and no support. The thought that my taxes are used to support people who make this a lifestyle choices makes me really upset.

OP, remember you do not need to take these peoples judgement on board. You have to decide whether the benefit to working outweighs the negative. You are not obliged to find work until your child starts school so please dont feel pressured. Raising a small baby is not slacking.

Personally I wouldn’t be taking advice from anyone who is telling you that working to feed yourself and your family as is a waste of time.

But your mind is made up.

Dont please don’t let people’s nasty judgemental comments get to you. There’s some people on here that look down on people who claim benefits. The gouverment do very little to encourage people to get back to work. I wasn’t working for quite a while due to having 2 disabled children, my dh then left so I could not rely on his income. I am now working part time (in a well paid job) but am no better off. I decided to go back to work and to gain expereance in a new career.

It’s not easy being a single parent and I don’t think I could work full time (if my dd’s Didn’t have special needs I probably could).

I don’t think it’s wrong for you to wait until you get some free child care but if your going to be better off working part time and claiming less beniffits then it could be better for you both?

Don't worry about the benifit bashers you do what is best for you and your son which probably right now is staying at home with him.
In a few years going back to work will be a lot easier he's still really young and trust me nursery is not great for babies his age I should know I work in one.

miss who looks after your disabled child during school holidays? This is my big problem, no one wants to look after my kids, they are too old for clubs and childminders but they have special needs and can’t be left on their own. It’s impossible for me to work full time

@missadasmith

love, we have a local scheme for children wirh complex needs. It's not ideal as it's not close to home and DD isn't totally happy there but I cannot afford carers allowance so I don't have much choice. but my job is only school hours not full time . whilst DD can attend the holiday club, we have nothing for before/after school (and don't get me started on the night wakings, appointments which I try to schedule after school/after work - I couldn't handle full time). I am on a heavy dose of ADs as I cannot cope with working and caring otherwise. the last 10 years really have taken a toll on me). I will only be able to go back full time when DD is in some kind of residential setting.

I make it 4k a year. That money would make a huge difference to a lot of people's lives. And PT work means 4 days at home with DC, plus holidays, with more money in your pocket to spend on them. It doesn't seem a bad deal to me.

OMG people her child is one years old not school age.
If she was a SAHM with a husband she would be praised.

Don't get me wrong, I want nothing more than to work.

I didn't want this life, I didn't want to be on benefits, I was meant to go straight back to work

And now you just can't be arsed.

Why should I not get my full wages at my job because some will be taken away to give to you because you don’t want to work?

Where do you think the money comes from?

@DontHaveAGoPlease when I went back to work I used to run a deficit during the school holidays as childcare for two cost more than I earned; basically DH was paying childcare for the privilege of me being able to go back to work. I made a modest amount during term time (never worked out the hourly, as I was self employed on varying hours). I guess it really depends on whether you want to spend time with your child and have other people pay to raise him, or whether you want to spend slightly less time with your child whilst giving him an opportunity to socialise independent of you, and pay towards raising him too. I'm really sorry your ex and family are useless, but that doesn't mean you can't take time for yourself and you might find you benefit from that little time and independence too

Where do you think the money comes from?

Don't worry, someone will be along soon to say it's all the fault of Starbucks, et al, not paying enough tax to try to deflect the blame.

You chose to have a child - why should I have to pay for you to stay at home so that you don't 'miss out on milrstones'?

I went back to work part time when DC was 15 months old, we could have managed financially but I was used to having my own money and it irked me to ask DH. After childcare costs etc, I was better off by £200 a month
It wasn't worth it financially but it did a lot for my sense of self worth.

Fuck that OP, it’s what benefits are for. Your child is only one, leave it a little while. You can always make more money later, but you never get the time back. Folks may not like it, but you are Entitled to them. We pay four figures in tax every month and it’s the likes of Google and Starbucks aggressively avoiding tax that concerns me, rather than a little bit of benefit for a very short time for those who need it.
If folks don’t like it, they can mind their own damn business.

You're a single mum and it will be tough going here and there, working will be a massive benefit to you and your DS in the long run, for every milestone you lose you will gain just as many, if not more cherished memories.

Erm I'm due back to work in 2 months when ds2 is 6 months old... like millions of other parents who have no choice but to work I will miss out on milestones... sorry but i have no sympathy at all... if im.being honest you shouldn't have a choice. Why should I have to subsidise you staying off with your child when i have to leave mine??

If you don't want to work and would rather live off benefits then at least own it and be honest.

It's your life, do what you want. If you would rather live off benefits, go for it. You don't need to ask randoms on the internet.

Some people are so far up their own arses

So I should have to pick up the entire slack my ex has decided not to?

No you shouldn't, but that's a whole other thread. I agree that it's appalling how men are allowed to just bugger off and pay nothing or next to nothing to bring up children they created whilst the taxpayer picks up the burden. But you don't get off scot free either and to a certain extent you do have to just suck it up because your ex wasn't the only one making the choices. Lots of people cope with very difficult financial situations, and work for pretty much nothing once their essential bills are taken out. We can't all just decide we aren't going to bother. 22 hours still leaves you with plenty of time.

i think if everybody took there out goings off there wage there hourly rate would be poor .