To not want to work for £3.58 an hour?

[DontHaveAGoPlease]

Going to get absolutely flamed for this!

I'm a single mum to 1, in regards to UC, I get the equivalent to a monthly full time wage this includes CM.

If I go back to work for 22 hours a week, I will be effectively earning the above an hour.

Do I just suck it up or wait for my DS to get his 15 Hours free??

I am desperate to work but I'd hate to look back and regret outsourcing my childcare all for the above. Shall I just suck it up and go for it or suck it up and look after my ds??

I've already braced myself for the flaming!

Do what feels right for you OP and sod those making comments about you being "welfare people". They are judgemental arseholes

Yes if you can return to work and make it work for you and be financially better off then jump at it. Lots of reasons to work beyond financial....
Getting out of the house and having adult conversation for one.

However, if you are going to end up worse off at the moment and unable to pay bills then leave it until your little one has some nursery provision. It will be much easier at that point. If you can find the energy then look at courses you could do to improve your employment options when the time comes.

Going back to work when you've been on benefits with the knowledge it might leave you struggling is scary. I've done it and was anxious until I started paying the bills and realising it was going to be okay. I've managed to get off benefits totally now. ..unless you count Carers Allowance and DLA (my DS is autistic and has learning difficulties). I guess those are indeed benefits but not standard ones.

I agree you should look at the bigger picture. I, like 1000s of others had to work full time when mine were babies, I NEVER felt I missed out on any milestones and I take offence to anymore who suggests my kids missed out on anything as a result.

Use these years to work on and build your career so that when they are in school you have a better future.

So I should have to pick up the entire slack my ex has decided not to??

for starters, the ex is paying CM. and even if he would not, it's not a good enough reason to expect the state to pick up the entire slack. you also decided to have a child. It's your responsibility too.

no idea why the OP posted in the first place stating she is desperate to work when very much the opposite appears to be the case

I've managed to get off benefits totally now. ..unless you count Carers Allowance and DLA (my DS is autistic and has learning difficulties).

so you manage financially entirely on the pittance of CA and DLA?

It's not working for £3.58 an hour though is it. It's paying you way like everyone else does - no one actually gets their official hourly rate.

No ginger, I have a husband who works and contributes. I am fortunate enough not to have to manage alone anymore. Hence no need for any other benefits.

fair enough but a very different scenario to a lone parent...

If you can get through it and afford to be a sahm then I would.
I only went back to work as we couldn't afford me not to!
I'd love to be at home with my kids more!

Working in this case does not make you worse off

This thread went exactly as I predicted near the beginning. Mumsnet is the most privileged group of people on forums I've ever seen!

OP you look at this the wrong way... like others have said it's potentially the next 3years of having a low wage due to childcare v many more years in low wage employment due to luck of experience and the general difficulties of finding work to fit around DC. It's much easier to build up a good working relationship with your employer while DC is at nursery. You might find it easier to ask for flexible working/ school hours from your employer simply because you are there as an valued employee.

Absolutely ginger and that's my point in this thread. She many people judging the OP. How many of them will be lone parents trying to do everything?

And without my husband I would still be on benefits.

All very easy for folk here to judge someone without thinking of the real hardships

Op I wouldn't bother with work until you get free childcare.
Working in a dead end job and being almost nothing better off screws your mental health up completly.

I don't understand why people are saying you don't want to work. You do but just want to earn enough not to have to deal with benefits.
There are thousands of people in your situation and the government have made it so it's not worth working not you!

Dolores, I think you are comparing apples with pears. I have a DC with ASD and very severe LDs and parenting a child with very complex needs is just not the same as being a LP to a child without SN. I think in the OPs situation, it would be very manageable to work 3 days a week. (I am working 5 days under huge stress because CA and UC won't pay my mortgage - I really don't have a lot of sympathy for those who can easily work but chose not to). And 22 hours isn't really that much. op would be better off financially and still have plenty of time for her DS.

I thought UC was meant to be the pits of the earth, throwing people into dire straits.

But then somebody comes along saying I've been offered a job. I'd be £75 odd better off a week thinking should I, shouldn't I.

Well maybe UC isn't that bad after all.

Op most women are back at work before their child's first birthday. Your choice but it's easier to get a better job once your in a job.

I am quite horrifed by the terrible opinions on here. Bunch of middle class people who don't know the difference between a career and a job. Massive difference. And if that job is low paying then the mental health issues that can arise from it are shocking. OP if you can stay home with your baby then do. Ignore all these views about 'living off benefits is so wrong' - we (the UK) have a benefit system to help people like yourself. That is what it is for. If not we may as well go back to the Victorian days of sending babies to baby minders who feed them opium to keep them quiet all day and the mum working all hours for pennies meaning a poor diet, bad mental health, bad housing and then dying at 40. Ooh we could bring back Foundling Hospitals and then babies could be dropped off there for a future of domestic service (girls) and Army (boys) - read Hetty Feather - and the mum doesn't have to pay for her child because a charity is. Or.... we can have a system in place that helps those in need for a few years. You can still have a socialble and stimulating life with a baby in tow. Stay home. Look after your baby. Keep your mental health good. That's important.

"ou might find it easier to ask for flexible working/ school hours from your employer simply because you are there as an valued employee."

That's assuming she'll definitely get a permanent, secure job.

And if that job is low paying then the mental health issues that can arise from it are shocking.

are you saying that product should avoid low paying jobs then?

bunch of middle class people who don't know the difference between a career and a job.

I can only speak for myself but I have a job (despite being a carer for a severly disabled child) and do does my DP (and not a high flying career).We don't get benefits but have zero luxuries. haven't had a holiday in a decade, no meals out, only heating the house when it is cold, no luxuries whatsoever despite working + caring. The OP is having a blast in comparison.

Yes, you should work.

On a low income, that extra £70 a week is not insignificant, because it's all/mostly extra disposable income (I can't see if you've accounted for travel costs as well as childcare).

For example, say you currently have a benefit income of £150 pw and your bills etc are £140, you have £10 disposable income, so hardly anything and a struggle.

But if your income is £220 pw and your bills etc are £160, you then have £60 spare to spend on what you like, so you will be able to afford more nice things, better food, days out with your DS and be able to put a bit aside if your washing machine breaks etc, so financially much more comfortable and worth so much more than the bare £3.58 an hour.

Plus the other advantages of getting out of the house and mixing with adults, so good for mental health hopefully. It's only 22 hours a week, so still plenty of time with your DS,, a good balance really.

For all the people kicking off, please remember......before my son arrived, I was a tax payer.

Even on government help, I do volunteer work & also a course to help me job wise.

I'm not sat on my ass doing nothing thanks.

The thing is benefits are there for those who have no other choice.
They aren't there to facilitate life choices.
If you can work: work.
It is not fair in any way shape or form to expect to be supported by the state so you can spend more time with your child.

Also, being a tax payer isn't just funding for benefits. The average person on the average salary still takes more from the pot than they put in in their life time just from using standard facilities, using the NHS (for average things) and from getting an education.

NCJaneDoe and others, unless you are in the top 5% of earners then what is taken from your wage doesn't even cover what you use in terms of infrastructure, health, education etc.

Why should the top 5% pay for you to have babies just because you don't want to earn 150K plus p/a? Pay for your own childbirth and life saving operations, stop scrounging off the rich folk.

and miss out on milestones as my DS is only 1
What a shame. Looks like I’m going to be missing out on quite a few milestones as I’m having to return to work when my baby is 3 months old.