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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it's impossible to explain how painful labour is?

521 replies

Mamabear1475 · 03/05/2018 17:49

Sil is trying for a baby. She asked how painful it is. I told her there is no way to describe it. She said it must feel like something. I can't think of anything that explains the feeling

OP posts:
ew1990 · 03/05/2018 17:51

I agree, it was a pain I've never felt before and I can't describe it to anyone

ethelfleda · 03/05/2018 17:51

YANBU I can remember the pain but I can't explain it really. Besides, all women are different/have different amounts of pain/feel the pain in different places.
I don't know why she would want to know - best to be blissfully unaware!

DuchyDuke · 03/05/2018 17:52

Tell her it feels like a really bad period but with a baby coming out instead of a clot lol

Pengggwn · 03/05/2018 17:52

It felt like being crushed to death.

Hemlock2013 · 03/05/2018 17:53

I think there is or are points when most people think they might die aren’t there? That might sum it up neatly... 😂

M0RVEN · 03/05/2018 17:53

Apparently doctors say it’s equivalent to the pain of an amputation ( without an anaesthetic of course ). So best not tell her that.

If anyone ask me I just say “ take the drugs”

ikeepaforkinmypurse · 03/05/2018 17:54

like a really bad period but with a baby coming out instead of a clot lol

that's a good start Grin

Waggingmyginger · 03/05/2018 17:54

Gallstones but much more of your body. Period cramps turned all the way up to 5,000?
Maybe not enough for some labours after all, the experience of pain is personal.
Before I had a baby my Drs used to describe pain on a scale of 1-10. Now they tend to ask in relation to Labour. Gives you a clue.

TheHulksPurplePanties · 03/05/2018 17:55

I only had c-sections, but after hours (and In Dad's case months) of contractions. There is no way to explain it other tgan, it's horrible but bearable, and worth it.

Sallystyle · 03/05/2018 17:55

It's like really really bad trapped wind.

I suffer with trapped wind and I have had five children. I think the pain is very similar. I have been on my knees with trapped wind. So times that pain a few times and I think you get close.

That only helps explain it if you get horrendous trapped wind pain though.

blackteasplease · 03/05/2018 17:55

Like the worst gastroenteritis ever

Or swine flu

Greenglassteacup · 03/05/2018 17:55

Like dry socket but in your abdomen. Dry socket is like labour in your face.

Notsooriginalwerther · 03/05/2018 17:57

When i was asked what it felt like the only thing close enough was being cut in half with an axe that was on fire.... or simply that my body was going to rip in half. but that still doesn’t do justice to the pain. Also I mooed like a cow.

cjferg · 03/05/2018 17:58

A mixture of horrendously bad period pain, backache and trapped wind all at once.

mypickleliesovertheocean · 03/05/2018 17:59

Really bad period, then like doing a massive poo but times 1000 in size and out your vagina.

EdmundCleverClogs · 03/05/2018 18:00

Like someone sticking an industrial powered hoover up your arse, and switching it on and off at increasing close intervals.

EscapistTendencies · 03/05/2018 18:00

It's akin to biliary colic/gallstones passing as I found out a few years ago. Actually despite a very prolonged and painful labour my gallstone attacks were worse, vomiting for 9 hours solid, unable to move other than rocking, I couldn't even use the phone to call an ambulance and thought I would actually die the first time it happened. Pretty useless comparison though, unless she's actually had gallstones!

ethelfleda · 03/05/2018 18:01

Mine was all felt right in the groin - especially as it got worse. Maybe like a hundred people all trying to slice you open and beat you with a hammer all at the same time?
I would definitely get an epidural next time. I had one but too late to make much of a difference to the contractions. Although pushing didn't hurt.

RoboticSealpup · 03/05/2018 18:01

the only thing close enough was being cut in half with an axe that was on fire.... or simply that my body was going to rip in half

Yeah! Or cut in half from the inside work a chainsaw! I can't believe I actually want to do this again

jellycat · 03/05/2018 18:01

I think Notsooriginalwerther and Hemlock2013 have described it pretty well! But maybe best not to tell your SIL....

RoboticSealpup · 03/05/2018 18:01

*with a chainsaw

MatildaTheCat · 03/05/2018 18:02

It might also be worth reminding her that contractions come and go. And build up in strength and length and frequency. And that if it becomes too much there are some pretty decent methods of pain relief.

I’ve seen hundreds of women in labour and they all had a different experience so whilst almost all would say, yes, contractions are painful, they would give many descriptions of that pain.

She’s asking you in good faith but she’s looking for reassurance. Some of the comments here would be terrifying.

ethelfleda · 03/05/2018 18:02

Like someone sticking an industrial powered hoover up your arse, and switching it on and off at increasing close intervals

Yes to this

FowlisWester · 03/05/2018 18:02

not that bad. Manageable pain. A bit like a vice squeezing your back. I had a 3hr labour with no pain relief and i tore. It wasn't awful.

Pengggwn · 03/05/2018 18:08

She’s asking you in good faith but she’s looking for reassurance. Some of the comments here would be terrifying

It was terrifying. Never felt anything like it.