PIL has sent be a bill for a broken wine glass

[pugreverywhere]

Yes, had to namechange.

Went to PIL' home last weekend, had a glass of wine and I accidentally dropped it. No big deal, they shrugged it off. I get on well with both FIL and MIL, have been with DH for 4 years now and we are having our first child in 4 months.

They're well off.. as in, VERY well off.. DP and I on the other hand live in a rented 3 bed semi-dettached property so definitely not as well off.

I didn't know at the time, but said wine glass apparently happens to be pretty high end. FIL has this morning sent me an e-mail saying that I can just transfer the £156 to him or buy the glass online. He even attached a link and included their address, should I not know it by now(!).

At first I thought it was a joke only to realise that these people have no sense of humor, so they obviously must be expect me to pay them ASAP. Haven't told DH yet. Really shocked at this as they are not known for being stingy.

AIBU not to pay this? I am tempted to buy a £20 glass off Amazon!

Blimey, I'm looking forward to getting a £156 Fathers' Day present from each of my children next month! The bar has been set...

(Actually, I've never as an adult bought my dad a present for F Day - he just gets a card ).

Why were you e-mailing FIL back? Surely this was one for your DH to respond to.

If this is out of character for FIL do you think that there may be some early dementia setting in?

Reply. We will see what we can do. Don’t engage. Then buy the stupidly expensive glass and a cheap plastic sippy cup.

I'm astounded that your PILs would do this when (and I'm making an assumption here) they can clearly afford to replace it themselves. This is relatively early days in your relationship with them and you'll be related for a long time to come. Why on earth would they jeopardise the goodwill and love that is growing between you all for a fucking glass? Are they high?

Oh, fuck him off! I'd give the car back and all the baby stuff and tell them to flog that to pay for the wine glass. It was an accident!

Gosh, cross post, just seen your update. You are better off not getting help from them if they hold things over you.....

'Dear FIL, I have received your email and I have to say I am astounded that anyone owns glasses that expensive and gives them to guests to use. I will pay you the money, even though we don't have that sort of money spare. Unfortunately, i do not think I will ever feel comfortable visiting your home again, should one of us accidentally break or damage something expensive and we receive another bill from you. In the future you will have to come to our home to see your grandchildren, however we won't be able to afford to entertain you for a while as we will find it difficult to find the money after paying your bill for the wine glass'

Definitely talk to DH first.
Of you get any more contact reply that you're waiting for your DH to get home to speak to him.

I'd be buying your DH a backbone for father's day.

@ICantCopeAnymore
I cried when I broke my £12 Cath Kidston champagne flute because you can't get them any more and I love them.

Have you checked out places like this?
www.chinamatchers.co.uk/
lots of other websites like it. Could be worth a try.

Screen shot a pic of similar glass and have it printed off and framed for father's day.. Job done.

Transfer him £15.60 and say younassumed he’s forgotten the decimal point.... or better still £1.56 and mention what good quality it was considering they were so cheap

Obviously this whole thing is ludicrous, but so's the idea many people have that they should claim on insurance. By the time you've accounted for the excess and the increased premiums, claiming £156 on your home insurance will COST you money.

Or better still a pack of these for when you come over instead £9.99 for the 4 and don’t buy the expensive glass. www.rinkit.com/products/rcr-crystal-orchestra-crystal-wine-glasses-290ml-set-of-4?variant=24695597510&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIlrm-hofq2gIVzLftCh2wdgcdEAQYASABEgJq5vD_BwE when he looks aghast, explain he knows you couldn’t afford the glass and thought he was pulling your leg.

I'd definitely get a used one. Like for like!

Write him a cheque for the glass so that he has to go to the bank to pay it in, and then buy the new one himself, and get DH to hand deliver it (when he drops off the car) at a time when he knows FIL will be out, to make sure MIL gets the whole story. Then buy him a single wine glass from Asda for Father's Day. And explain to MIL that they will only be able to see the baby when they visit you, as you can't afford to take a small child to their place.

MountainSkies she has spoken to her DH.

Everyone is so certain that MIL doesn't know, but she may well do.

They/he sound v controlling and your dh is under their/his thumb.

Could he be early stage dementia? Only explanation I can think of...

Was there a link to this wonder-glass? I've trawled the whole thread but haven't been able to find one.

Bloody hell OP, get your DH to grow a backbone. So what if they've bought stuff for the baby, that's what grandparents do. Tell FIL to go to hell, the cheeky fucker. As previous posters have said, you'll never be able to take your baby to visit in case he/she breaks something and you get an invoice.

Just got a response now saying "yes, but technically shouldn't you be giving me two then? the broken glass can hardly count as a present".

Speechless.

I think I'd buy him the tesco value ones - two sets, since it's fathers day, after all.

And definitely tell him you won't be able to bring dc over till they're at least 25 and earning decent money, in case of breakages!

Thank you @juells - I have and unfortunately I can't find them anywhere

I'm guessing your husband had already offered to replace it, and asked his Dad to forward the link? We broke an expensive decanter once and replaced it, it's what you should do I think.