PIL has sent be a bill for a broken wine glass

[pugreverywhere]

Yes, had to namechange.

Went to PIL' home last weekend, had a glass of wine and I accidentally dropped it. No big deal, they shrugged it off. I get on well with both FIL and MIL, have been with DH for 4 years now and we are having our first child in 4 months.

They're well off.. as in, VERY well off.. DP and I on the other hand live in a rented 3 bed semi-dettached property so definitely not as well off.

I didn't know at the time, but said wine glass apparently happens to be pretty high end. FIL has this morning sent me an e-mail saying that I can just transfer the £156 to him or buy the glass online. He even attached a link and included their address, should I not know it by now(!).

At first I thought it was a joke only to realise that these people have no sense of humor, so they obviously must be expect me to pay them ASAP. Haven't told DH yet. Really shocked at this as they are not known for being stingy.

AIBU not to pay this? I am tempted to buy a £20 glass off Amazon!

Fuck me! I'd consider a £20 glass expensive mine are £1!!! Actually less - £3.50 for 4 I think wilko

They're idiots for spending that much on a sodding glass anyway!

No way pay for that. Glasses get broken part of life.

They can clearly easily afford to replace so either they do at that price or get a grip and get cheaper glasses.

I bet even the queens glasses are cheaper!! I'm no royalist but I'm also betting the queen has damn site better manners too!

Those moda glasses are UGLY my parents had very similar glasses in the 70's (obtained with cigs vouchers 😂) having now seen the cushion too (my eyes! My eyes!) I am firmly of the opinion it's a pisstake site designed to fleece those with more money than sense!!

Love Adora's response

Bloody hell and he's already chasing you for an answer? Rude, bullying arse!

"To be fair you broke his glass so I would just pay it." What! Why? Plus I know less than 6 people who could AFFORD to! Most people I know this is half their rent!

I think it's also possible dh/mil will say "are they hell worth that much!"

Now getting the most godawful ugly stuff on that site on my popup ads

I’d email both PIL and say you’ve set up a standing order for £1.56 for the next 100 months and this is all you and dh can afford at this time. Then mention that on balance it seems best that you don’t visit any more since you are such a risk and certainly taking a baby to their house would be recklessness gone mad.

Such a pity. Fuckity bye. Possibly sign off with a few emojis.

^^ best post ever

Not sure what I'm most at - the price of the wine glass or knob head FIL.

Oooh I like the £1.56 standing order idea!

I especially like 'fuckity bye' and will be using that myself.

There must be some sort of backstory (even if the OP is unaware of it ) ...

A few years ago my ILs (who were not short of a few bob, thanks to their unlawful activities ...) heard from DW that our lawnmower had packed up. MiLs DP said since they'd had their garden astroturfed (said they were minted) they didn't need their lawnmower anymore, so we could have it.

Next day, had a call at work from DW saying that MiL had called and was happy for us to have the lawnmower for £80 ... to be fair DW was more shocked than I was - she said she was "gobsmacked" that any money was mentioned. Especially as we had given them a power scooter I had managed to repair that cost us £50.

If anyone's read this far, they won't be surprised to see the letters "NC" are now in play ....

When MiL calls you can say that you'll pay in instalments as you can't afford it. I bet she says "pay for what?" then you'll hear a fight and her saying "FFS Albert* what's the matter with you"
*Or whatever his name is

But it's DH's problem really.
I like the idea of going on chinasearch.

But if they mean it, you can't eat or drink anything there ever again.

Your FIL is a bad mannered oaf by the way. I hope DP's reaction is to speak to MIL (his mum) about it. Sounds as if it's all FIL's idea to send a bill and hopefully she'll go bananas and put him in his place.

My DD broke what we found out later was an expensive lead crystal cut-glass glass at PILs last year. They told her not to worry at all , said ''we've got loads they're not important!'' and sweetly handed her another full one.

THAT is proper manners.

FIL sounds very controlling - Please do mention it to MIL !

Do as Aunt Lydia said, text him to say your email is playing up and can he email Dh instead with whatever it was.

Then await your Dh's response.

Do not respond to FIL about the issue, only the fact that you haven't received the email.

This is why our glasses are 50p - £1 each in Ikea. I have 18 drinking glasses. They do get broken and once I am down to 12 I buy more of the same if they are still available. If not I donate that set and buy a new one in a new design again from Ikea.

Pay them as soon as you can. Consider yourself cheaply ridden of such crass people.

Omg the descriptions too

"Amanda Lindroth seamlessly blends classical architecture and proportion to create unique tableware. Inspired by the breezy island lifestyle, this glass is encased in woven raffia to prevent water stains" how the fuck does raffia prevent water stains in a glass?! Bugger to wash too! Bloody hideous!

This reminds me of a time that MIL broke one of our 'expensive' wine glasses. They were a wedding present and £10 each or something. Obviously I said nothing to her, but grumbled to DH after they'd gone.

Roll on a couple of years later, I broke one of MIL's lampshades, complete accident. I then laughed, more out of fright than anything. BIL then told MIL I'd laughed then broken the lamp. She replied probably out of spite for the wine glass she'd broken a few years earlier.

This resulted in strained relations between MIL and myself, despite me apologising. I did replace the broken lamp base, at a cost of £6 from Ikea.

Things are still strained 18 years later and she STILL brings up the lamp. FFS, accidents happen. We're now down to 5 of the original 12 wine glasses after 20 years of marriage.

I think your FIL needs to get over himself. IL's are odd fuckers.

When I got married we were given a beautiful coloured glass fruit dish by one of exh relations. Have no idea how much it cost but that's not the point it was beautiful and I loved it.

When DS was a toddler he accidentally pulled it off a table and it smashed into a thousand pieces. I was gutted.

He's 38 now. I think I've waited long enough; I'm composing my email to him in my head as I type. Not sure how much to charge him, and should I charge interest?

When I got married I received a pair of crystal glasses that were £100 a pair. The glasses live in a padded box and DH and I are the only ones who use them, and only on special occasions. If we've already had a few we don't use these glasses in case we drop them. I can't imagine letting anyone else use them and they're 1/3 the price of OP's PIL's glasses! Imo PIL shouldn't let anyone else use a glass they can't afford to replace. Totally out of order to ask a guest to pay for an accidental breakage.

Find two nice sets of glasses in argos , post them a link to the page and say I can give you vouchers for either of them sets which ones do you prefer. with the comment ooh and look you can get 4 / 6 glasses for x amount

I clicked on the link, not Im getting 100's of similarly ugly and overpriced Moda glasses advertised on my MN sidebar of advertising shame

"When MiL calls you can say that you'll pay in instalments as you can't afford it. I bet she says "pay for what?" then you'll hear a fight and her saying "FFS Albert* what's the matter with you"
*Or whatever his name is"

Made me proper laugh out loud - but also wouldn't surprise me if true!

Bloody hell! £156 for a wine glass? What sort of world do these people live in?

I bet your MIL knows nothing about it.

See what your dh says but if you do pay it, take the piss out of him at every available opportunity for the next 20 years.

pigsDOfly charge him at least the cost of an amazing holiday to help mitigate the emotional damage you've suffered all these years.......

I love the fact that moda operandi is now displaying me ads on this thread showing ridiculously expensive stuff because I clicked on the link upthread.

Agree with pp that FIL is actually demonstrated tremendous ill-breeding, they must be nouveau riche.

Agree DH should deal with this. If he feels they should be paid, I agree with doing it in installments and sending an email (so you have it in writing) that at any future visits you will not be paying for any other things that are broken by you or dc, so they'd better order some plastic ikea crockery for you to use.

In all seriousness, if the pil are generally OK, then the money isn't worth falling out over but you need to make sure you're not caught out again.

Utter madness. It’s not like you were bowling with their Ming vase collection - glasses get broken (which is why I hate getting given the damn things.)

I’d query it with dh and MIL in copy. If they insist, pay it, then regretfully announce you couldn’t possibly take the risk of having a baby rampaging in their house so you won’t be bringing them over. Ever. Or at least until they’ve all got Good Jobs in the City.