Is this groom a CF?

[SaveBandit]

I usually love a good CF thread and ones mixed in with weddings are always great. But now that it's happening to us I'm not sure what to do!

We went to a wedding at the weekend for one of DH's colleagues. They had an amazon gift list so DH ordered something from there. It came in quite a big box and the shape of the actual gift meant that we had to wrap the box with the gift inside.

When we arrived we noticed that nobody else had presents, thought nothing of it but people kept commenting and saying "We just got them vouchers/money." We asked DH's colleague, the groom, where to put it and he was quite surprised and said "We weren't expecting gifts. Thank you, can you put it by the post box for cards?"

So we did, forgot all about it and enjoyed the day and night. Towards the end of the night we stood near the post box and I pointed out that ours was still the only present. DH laughed it off and said "Looks like we're the only ones who saw the gift list!" Left a short while after and thought nothing more about the gift.

DH got a message last night from groom saying "Thanks for coming on Saturday and for the gift. We had a bit of a last minute change and decided to ask for money towards the honeymoon instead of what we'd put on the gift list. Can we arrange to send it back and just get the money for it instead? I can pass it back next week when I'm back in work. Really appreciate the thought but definitely think we need a holiday after the stress of wedding planning."

The gift cost £70. DH didn't reply but showed it to me. I was just shocked at how cheeky it was. I'm leaving it up to him to sort because I have only met the couple a handful of times. I do just feel a bit stupid turning up with this huge box when everyone else seemed to be told to give money/vouchers. Dh said this was the first he'd heard of giving money and he has no problem giving money but feels asking if we can return it and give him money instead is a bit out of order.

Should we just return it and leave it at that or does anyone have any choice words or phrases we can reply with?!

[FrozenMargarita17]

Agree with pp - return and give them 20 for being a cheeky shite!

[Sparklyshoes16]

Do not give any more money!! Give them the returns ref thing and that's it...otherwise if you can...you return it...give them £20 and keep £50! Honestly some people are such CFs!

[theeyeofthestormchaser]

Bloody cheeky. I'd return the gift and give them £10.

[MsP0b]

He is a CF

[Branleuse]

return it and give them £20

[StaplesCorner]

I reckon even if the CFG gets the paperwork etc., he wont return the item, leaving the OP even more out of pocket. Dont give him anything else, go with the suggestion earlier just say yes of course return it to the shop and get what you want.

But I bet CFG would then come back and ask for more money again!!

[AHedgehogCanNeverBeBuggered]

Definitely return it and then keep 'forgetting' to hand over the cash. CF groom will either have to ask for it more than once (making him look utterly crass) or silently seethe!

[NCJaneDoeNut]

[Emus]

If it was purchased directly from their own Amazon Wishlist then they can return it (without you being aware) so they've ruined that for themselves and in the process made you and your DH feel crap! I'd tell them to sort it out themselves.

[calzone]

Definitely just give £10 instead.

Cheeky git.

[Nikephorus]

Return it. Keep the cash. If he asks go with a vague "oh yes, must remember to give you some cash some time" and change the subject. If he presses then a simple should suffice.

[willynillypie]

So.fucking.rude.

Do NOT give them returns stuff and money! I would give them the returns stuff and say something stiff like "What a shame that we weren't told about this beforehand." and DO NOT GIVE THEM MONEY. Fuck that shit. You got them a gift from THEIR LIST and they are turning it down = their problem. I would wait for the penny to drop after they've returned the gift that they have not received any money. It is highly unlikely they would then ask, but as they are CFs of the highest order they might, in which case you could say "Seriously? We bought you a gift from the gift list, it wasn't good enough and you had to return it and now you are demanding cash!?"

Hate rudeness like this.

[Emus]

Although as someone else pointed out, they wouldn't receive cash back, just Amazon credit.

[Rudgie47]

I'd return it and keep the money for myself.

[TheClitterati]

Give them the receipt and let the CF return it himself.

[ChasedByBees]

Nosquirrel has the right explanation. You were prepared to spend that much on something you thought you’d love but you wouldn’t give that much cash.

[ChasedByBees]

‘Thought they’d love’ that should be

[Myimaginarycathasfleas]

Ooh, I love a CF thread and a wedding one too - top effort OP!

It’s unlikely the desired holiday hangs on your contribution if everyone else gave cash, so they are just being greedy. I would tell them it’s too late to return the gift. Refuse to engage further on the matter. Let them live with it as a daily reminder of their own appalling manners.

[Inertia]

It's really rude, especially as it's something from their own gift list.

The most rude thing about it is that they now expect you to do all the fetching/carrying/admin/returning, having already bought and wrapped the present in the first place.

I would tell him that he's more than welcome to send it back if that's what he wants, but you don't have the time to do all that admin for him.

Alternatively, go with the suggestion above about giving them a reduced amount once you've had your money back, to allow for postage and admin.

Or tell them that you've also had a last minute change of plan and donated the refund to a donkey sanctuary.

[expatinscotland]

He doesn't want to return it himself because then he won't get the money, just store credit. But he expects the OP's DH to go through the trouble of doing so and possibly incur expense of postage and then hand him the money. Who does he think he is? That's pretty much expecting your DH to be his lackey and pay him for the privilege so I'd have no trouble burning this bridge at all by telling him to sling his hook (or the ol' 'Too late to return it, sorry, mate).

[GeorgeW78]

Didums! Why didn't they make their list private so no one could see it (let alone order from it) after they changed their minds? I wonder if other people bought early & had to return when they changed their minds? What a PITA, it's not like they didn't want the item.

[Celebelly]

Return it, give him a fiver, and spend the rest on a meal out with your husband. Even a fiver is more than the cheeky fucker deserves.

[LittlePear91]

Hahaha so cheeky! Haven't RTFT but I agree with others- send the gift back and give them less money. Spend the difference on something nice for you and your partner!

[shouldwestayorshouldwego]

If you do return it then check camel camel camel for the lowest price in recent months and deduct any postage too.

[BlueSapp]

CF, I definitely would say eh no, wise up you got what your getting!