#AD

[MintyT]

I don't know about you, but since the instamums posts I have really noticed the #AD on posts, and to be honest I had no idea I was so gullible. I loved the threads regards instamums and really think MN made a small change, well done us

@MediocrePenguin yes, but grain of salt. You don't need to freak out about the welfare of someone else's kids if they put them on social media. You can say, 'oh, well, I wouldn't do that, but as long as they're managing it the best way they can', but not many people do, do they. They flip out that those families are not parenting their children wisely because it's not how you would do it.

I had a friend once, say to me... 'oh, yes, I have this best friend. she's lovely. but... whispers I think she smacks her kids. Her poor children, I feel so sorry for them. What a terrible mother... but YES, she and I hang out all the time!'

WTF. Can you imagine that other friend, thinking that she can trust and rely on a girlfriend to have her back? Don't f*cking judge people, it's as simple as that.

Any celebrity unless of the Peter Andre/Katie Price ilk (who, again, need to use their children to sell their rubbish TV shows or sell an article to OK based on them being a wonderful parent) keep their children well out of the spotlight and no part of their celebrity. They make the line between public and private very clear. Basically because they know that - if not - the general public are entitled to comment and, boy, they will.

But Fence we are not taking about a specific child here we are talking about the wider issue of kids on social media.

Schools run sessions on how to stay safe online - how the hell can kids take this seriously if all of their info has already been out in the public domain from day one??

Seriously I think it's nuts. The wider picture is that influencers doing this sort of sharing makes people think it's ok, perhaps the government need to put out guidelines or run sessions for parents too as this could be so incredibly damaging for this new generation and their peers.

I feel sorry for the smacked children . I would also say to any friend immediately that I don't agree with smacking if it was brought up which it must have been if the friend you refer to knows about it. I don't unconditionally support any woman using physical chastisement just because I am also a woman

Most people probably wouldn't like to hear that but don't have such humongous egos and lack of self reflection that they would accuse me of being a "bully" for saying that.

NB is ranting about mumsnet and then ranting that she decided something should be done about it....last time I checked it wasn’t her campaign it was Mummabear who started it.
Why hasn’t NB said, ‘ I saw MB’s thread and agreed with her so have shared it. NB wants the glory, not very sisterly to me and possibly why she can’t give examples...because it wasn’t/isn’t her original idea. More like a way to get mentioned on mumsnet so she increased her followers!!!!

I need to know what exactly NB is driving at with her campaign. Could she not screenshot and post some of the comments she thinks shouldn't exist?

Sorry, don't mean to bold but it's easy to see which bit I'm referring to if I do. (Come on MN, we need a quote user function!)
Do you mean like the trans threads where some have called out some transphobic comments? They took that approach, screenshotting stuff, and all hell broke loose - there's a thread running called something like "MN Grass Account".
So yeah, I don't think that way works very well to be fair.

I was trapped in a car this afternoon being driven by elderly parent. FOD came on the radio and I had to listen.
I have daughters and my husband has always managed them really well right from tiny. At one point we had three under 4 and he was often the main carer. He is their dad and why shouldn’t he... it was never an issue. He didn’t give them ice cream for breakfast or let them run around and destroy things or draw on walls.
FOD and MOD sell themselves as modern feminist parents but this cliche inept dad thing is the direct opposite and terribly old fashioned.
Also I wonder about how the girls have the roles of DAUGHTERS not just kids, they play on that a lot. I might be wrong but they seem to have kitchens, dolls and colouring. My girls had toys... yes dolls and kitchen stuff but also trains, cars, trucks and spaceships. I might be wrong about the toy thing but I’m sure I’ve only seen traditional girls toys.
People always commented to my husband about having girls and he would always get cross and say they were his kids and what was their point. Like he should want Boys or be ‘outnumbered.’ It made him furious.
He is just a normal bloke and can be as un PC as anyone but this drove him mad.
In this day and age do we really need a dad instagrammer going on about being ‘outnumbered’.
Also my daughters were and are incredibly different.
It’s all a bit tedious.
Parenting should be about being just a parent of children not a father of daughters or a mother of daughters. You’ve really got to wonder why they give these people book deals.

The whole point of the "transphobic" comments thread is that many of the comments weren't actually transphobic and the individuals who had decided to set themselves up as mods very much had an agenda. Kind of like this situation.

Really, it is up to the owners of a site to moderate it as they see fit. I wonder how NB would feel if MN decided that they should be able to moderate all of the posts and comments on her Instagram feed based on a general perception of them being "unkind" to MN as a business.

Sorry if I’m off point I had a migraine yesterday and that and the trapped in a car with mad parent/radio 2 FOD thing has made me a bit nuts.

*best - agree with that. At one stage we had a 2 year old, a year old and a newborn. My DH managed to look after them just as well as I did (absent the breast feeding). The inept Dad is a bit of a cliche but, to be fair, he is pandering to his audience who find that appealing

Imagine if we always minded our own business about how to bring up kids...

Snaking would still be ok - kids would still be taught violence is the answer.

Junk food would be fine - childhood obesity would keep increasing and increasing

Kids on social media is common practice - they end up in dangerous situations and potentially at risk of mental health conditions

Taking about this sort of stuff causes society to question themselves and make changes.

My dad raised girls, or, as he thought of us, kids. He was great at it, taking us swimming, to football matches, to pop concerts (that he must've been bored shitless at), waiting outside pubs and parties for us in the car at midnight when we got older.

He was just being a dad, he didn't get a medal for it.

Interesting points, but many of these accounts are fame and money hungry. The public talk about people who have varying degrees of fame, people talk about Ant McPartlin, Katie Price, Eastenders, the Kardashians, you don't see them all moaning saying they are being bullied. Why are these kind of famous people expecting to be protected and get immunity from discussion? Because they are white, middle class and see themselves as real. But every famous persona out there is a real person. It's extremely unlikely you're going to please everyone all of the time, celebrities have to watch out for paps and articles in the Daily Fail. These people courting fame have to accept the rough with the smooth surely. And a discussion on mumsnet is hardly the end of the world. Don't Stars not read reviews or papers?
Father Of Daughters has just had an article in the Times with his children featured. Been on Radio 2. If you put yourself out there, people may talk about you, and they won't all love you. In fact the more 'fame' you Court the more critism you could get.

The actual point I was making about the trans threads though seems to have been overlooked. Somebody said why aren't they screenshotting?
If they did start doing that instead, do you think it is a better approach? Or do you think that it will go the way the trans ones did?
It didn't seem a good solution,as people felt " grassed on."

I think there's a difference between reviews and personal criticism, though Frodo.
Reviews tend to be balanced and/or factual.
People chatting and laughing about your hair or that you're a grabber,or imply that you don't care about your kids enough - not the same.
Latter personal attacks. There's a difference.

Instagrammers can just report on mumsnet. Like normal people. They don't need a "campaign". They also need to accept, like normal people, that sometimes MN will not make the deletions they want and that happens because MN is the ultimate arbiter of what goes on on their site. They also need to accept that if they publically commoditise their children, their potential customers will comment on the ethics and substance of that. Just as they do with Nestle or Cadburys. This seems to be causing some cognitive dissonance

The "campaign" is really not needed and misconceived but if NB does want a substantive campaign in future about anything, she really needs substantive and factual examples to be taken seriously.

This discussion is all find and dandy but Megababe is still sitting on a step waiting for a response. Should we send her a

*fine

@cady I've not read all of the threads but the bits I have read through didn't seem to be personal attacks, nothing about hair. And nothing recently with people suggesting people didn't care about their kids? More along the lines as to whether making them part of their business was a wise choice in the long run. They may not like that being discussed but it's not a personal attack. In my experience reviews tend to be a very personal point of view so that makes them personal?
It seems to be splitting hairs to be honest. If you make money out of fame you will get aspects of what you do discussed and you can't control that.

Instagrammers can just report on mumsnet. Like normal people. They don't need a "campaign"

Fair enough, people do need to report if they think something is below the belt.
I don't get why they shouldn't be able to call it out though? Personal attack types should be called out. If someone feels that they're being bullied, should they just stay quiet and not call it out?
(Can apply this in RL situations as well, I suppose)

It seems like 'instagram' itself has some kind of bubble around it. What if someone simply heard Father Of Daughters on the Radio as an author, and posted that they thought he sounded dreadful? Is that more acceptable because it's Radio 2 and his book, not Instagram?

and for Megababe!
If she's still on the step waiting whilst this is all going on, she'll need the cake. Not to mention the gin. All of the gin