To have not waited for the green man for the little boy (and Grandma) before crossing the road

[TwitterQueen1]

Walked into town earlier, waiting on a traffic island to cross the road. Single lane, no cars in sight so I start to cross the road. Grandma says "We're waiting for the little boy to cross the road." gesturing at the pedestrian crossing lights and clearly telling me not to cross but to wait with them. She said it twice - I only realised she was talking to me when she said it more loudly and forcefully. I turned round and said "Jolly good. You wait there then." and walked on.

I don't know how old the boy was - I wasn't paying them any attention. I wasn't close to them - at least 10ft away. There was a Grandma, a mother, a boy, a buggy and I think a Grandad too.

If it was school chucking out time and there was a crowd of children all waiting to cross a road I would have waited. But I'm 58, the boy wouldn't have even seen me. I don't need anyone's permission to cross the road.. WABU?

I've also been chastised for crossing on a red man by a woman with a small child. I was child-free (school time) so I was relishing the freedom of being able to cross a road when it was clear, not just when the green man said so.

I got a very PA, 'YES DARLING, WE ARE WAITING FOR THE GREEN MAN BECAUSE THAT'S THE SAFE THING TO DO', or something along those lines, shouted at my back as I skipped off in to the distance.

Still trying to get over lottie and the waiting at the lights fuckery

Agreed with some other PPs that our 3 DCs - 10,10&11 - are now downright dangerous as they’ve spent their life waiting for prompts from adults/green lights/lollipop/holding siblings hand etc and have failed to develop an awareness of their surroundings when road crossing :/

YANBU to cross, but be prepared to be told off by a small child. I had a really massive go at DS for setting a bad example when DD was small (big age gap) and told him if he didn't know how to cross the road properly he would have to hold my hand. A little while later a man next to us went to cross before the green man and had to step back because the traffic started to move as he stepped onto the road, DD repeated the entire lecture I had given DS, despite much shushing from me, finishing with "otherwise you will have to hold mummy's hand and i don't care if all your friends see you"

I cycle to work and I really really wish all pedestrians would only cross when the green man is lit when there's lots of traffic around. Every single sodding day I have a near miss with a pedestrian who thinks they can 'just' nip across, who hasn't looked both ways before stepping into the road or who has their nose in their phone.
In which case you need to alter the way you cycle in traffic. You need to pre-empt those more vulnerable than you. Your attitude is what gives cyclists a bad name

I detest the way too many cyclists cycle across with pedestrians when the green man is on. Do they really think the law does not apply to them?

YANBU to cross, but be prepared to be told off by a small child.

RainbowGlitterFairy Nope, nobody should “be prepared” for a rude child.

MASSIVE social faux pas to do that in Germany - you have clearly never been OP

I partly grew up in Germany and don’t remember censoriousness about roads. I’m quite old though.

I do find now that drivers in the UK will ostentatiously stop and let me cross if I’m waiting with the dogs but we’d all grow old at the same crossing if I’m waiting with DCs.

If the button has already been pressed, distract them by telling them to feel for the spinny bit underneath the unit. When green man appears it spins round. I prefer doing that now!

nobody should “be prepared” for a rude child.

Life must be very difficult if you take a child calling you naughty this seriously.

Life must be very difficult if you take a child calling you naughty this seriously.

BustopherJones It’s nothing to do with taking it seriously or otherwise. If you have raised a child that thinks it’s okay to admonish strangers, you have raised a rude child.

You haven’t raised a child - you’re raising them. They’re learning, and very few social rules, if any, come naturally without trial and error experimentation. With toddlers and preschoolers, rudeness really doesn’t come into it.

BustopherJones Sure, and if the parent picks their child up on being rude that’s all fine and dandy, but you can see from the many attitudes on this thread alone that quite a few parents appear smug about their child being so rude and don’t correct them.

Hence why we have so many rude children, because they aren’t being taught basic manners from a young age. Whether they mean to be rude or not, they have the ability to be - as shown in examples parents on this thread have given.

WhatToDo Yes I expected my 3 month old to say please and thank you before and after every feed.

Have you never heard about child development?

Hmmm. I have this with my dad regularly. I make him wait for the green man as he is with us and dashes about impatiently. BUT I’d never expect anyone else to wait for the green man. And actually sometimes on a totally empty road I’ve explained to the kids how it’s safe to cross as we don’t need to wait for the green man. They need to learn this for areas of road that have no lights so they can understand to assess the road and not just press a button to make a decision for them.

Have you never heard about child development?

ppeatfruit Yep. I’ve even spent two years studying it.

Then you should be aware that most 3 year olds do not have the mental and emotional maturity to NOT speak the truth (they can't keep quiet if they think that someone is doing something incorrectly) Especially if that person is crossing the road on the red light, that they have been taught NOT to do.

Any amount of teaching them to tell white lies, to not comment on a person's obesity or unusual skin tone or height etc. is likely to be ignored until they have reached the maturity required to do so.

ppeatfruit Are you deliberately missing the point I’m making?

I’ve stated it multiple times, but here we go again: it’s the parents attitude that matters in these situations. Of course three year olds rudely blurt stuff out, but they will only continue to do so if not corrected by their parents every single time it happens.

And as you can see from the many attitudes on this thread alone, quite a few parents appear smug about their child being so rude and don’t correct them. Therein lies the problem.

I detest the way too many cyclists cycle across with pedestrians when the green man is on. Do they really think the law does not apply to them?

Happens all the time in London. I'm sympathetic of those who want to get ahead of traffic before their lights change to green, but please don't mow me down in the process.

I dunno, I wait in that situation as I hate to think kids learn it's ok to not wait for the green man.

I find being told off by a small child for crossing unsafely funny. I'm not so amused at being told off by a crabby German for crossing recklessly or bemoaned by Lottie for not noticing the crestfallen wobbly lip on her poor wee dot. So the traffic-warden-in-training wins in my opinion ;)

Our lollipop lady has hysterics too, if anyone crosses before she’s walked out, checked both directions and blown her whistle for the ‘all clear’.

Thing is, it’s a widely used ‘normal’ crossing all the other hours of the day/night/weekend. She scolds all the non-school run pedestrians, who always look so shocked! You can hear them muttering ‘but I only crossed here 10 minutes ago under my own steam??? I’m 48, I can cross by myself??’.

I guess we shouldn’t giggle, but we DO love to hear her 4ft nothing telling off of Corporate types, and foreign students...it makes our morning far more entertaining! She HATES the seductive lure of the green man!

Yikes SleightOfMind my route to the train station takes me past the local primary school and the lollipop man always helps me cross with him! I am about the height of an 11 year old though so maybe he has terrible eyesight

I like pressing the buttons too... especially the ones that light up with a little ring of red LEDs. Sorry, kiddos...

No bemoaning here MmeButtox. You've misread me. My inner voice is surprisingly self-aware. It just sighed gently for my own little self-made predicament.

WhatToDo You may be making a point but it is an incorrect one. It is a developmental stage you cannot CORRECT a child out of it .

It's like trying to teach a baby to walk who is not physically ready. It's silly. Also it's cruel.