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Original poster

Everyone is saying what a lovely man Dale Winton was

71 replies

poppetpet · 19/04/2018 19:48

I am wondering how many people told him this when he was still alive? In all honesty do we ever say to other people (I don't mean family) that they are lovely and we really like them? From all accounts Dale was lonely and suffered from depression. Why can't we tell the people that we appreciate them in our day to day lives?

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NewYearNewMe18 · 19/04/2018 19:52

From the little I read, he hid away as he had self esteem issues stemming from his weight. If someone wants to hide away there is very little you can do about changing that mindset.

I feel very sorry for anyone who finds them self in that situation. It must be awful to feel there is no solution other than death.

pandarific · 19/04/2018 19:54

From all accounts Dale was lonely and suffered from depression. Why can't we tell the people that we appreciate them in our day to day lives?

It’s a kind thought op, but the thing is clinical depression (versus being a bit down etc) tends not to be about other people’s feelings about you, but more about your convictions about yourself.

You could be adored, but the phrase ‘depression lies’ is true - things get distorted.

SoleBizzz · 19/04/2018 19:55

Did Dale commit suicide? To think, he was lonely, is unimaginable to me, as he seemed to be such a lovely, upbeat soul. How he presented himself one way, when inside, he was the opposite and life felt bleak to him, I hope I never know. He must have been a clever man. So sad :(

KennDodd · 19/04/2018 19:57

How did he die?

Original poster
poppetpet · 19/04/2018 19:58

SoleBizzz I'm not saying he committed suicide - I don't think anyone knows yet. I just think when someone has depression and low self esteem (both of which I have had) it would give a boost to know that they were loved and liked by many people. Sadly nowadays that doesn't seem to be the case.

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flumpybear · 19/04/2018 20:00

If you're clinically depressed it doesn't matter how many people tell you how lovely you are - but i think it was a known thing he was lovely so he would have known

It's not been confirmed how he died - I wondered if he committed suicide, I really hope whatever it was he's in a happier place - he'll be sadly missed Sad

HelenaDove · 19/04/2018 20:03

"From the little I read, he hid away as he had self esteem issues stemming from his weight"

Hardly surprising when you see the attitudes to overweight people.

SoleBizzz · 19/04/2018 20:04

I didn't say you did!!!!! Very odd...

Idontdowindows · 19/04/2018 20:10

I just think when someone has depression and low self esteem (both of which I have had) it would give a boost to know that they were loved and liked by many people.

Did it cure your depression?

Ginkypig · 19/04/2018 20:13

I think overall though the point your making is a good one not specifically about dale winton because we don't really know but in general.

It's much more common to hear negative things these days or at the very least to not have people (who aren't very close to you) give you compliments or say a nice thing to you.

I can't remember the last time Iv had a compliment, being fare though Iv not had an insult recently either.

DD43 · 19/04/2018 20:14

YANBU. Nobody's been arsed with him (hardly,) for the last 15-20 years he has been alive, and now everyone is claiming they were his BFF. Really grates on me.

They were interviewing loads of people tonight on Midlands news who claim they knew his when he was a DJ on Beacon Radio (in the 1990's,) and what a lovely chap he was when they met him once when he came into their shop for a custard slice or a newspaper... Hmm

Fuck off trying to show you care when you didn't know him, you didn't care about him, and you probably haven't mentioned his name since 1999.

KeneftYakimoski · 19/04/2018 20:15

David Walliams is not someone I have a great deal of time for: I don't think he's funny, and he spells his name pretentiously. Post President's Club I have even less time for him, if that's possible. Little Britain is cheap, shallow, soft-target bullying; he and Matt Lucas are basically Hale and Pace with an O Level.

That said, he was extremely moving on Front Row just now, and was in what seemed to be genuine tears. He might be willing to ignore women being assaulted so long as he gets paid, but he did appear to have some semblance of a heart on this topic.

ScreamingValenta · 19/04/2018 20:17

I agree, it is a kind thought, but it isn't that simple in a state of bad depression, being told you are loved can be twisted by your low sense of self-worth into making you feel guilty because you "know" you are not worthy of being loved.

Apologies if that seems a bit confused; I'm trying to express something quite complex from my own experience.

My thoughts are with Dale's loved ones.

YearOfYouRemember · 19/04/2018 20:22

David spells his name like that as there was already a David Williams. Not pretentious.

bakingaddict · 19/04/2018 20:29

While not to downplay your experiences of depression, poppetpet you must realise that there are different forms of depression, severe clinical depression isn't going to be solved by kind words. We don't know what was going in his mind and as a fellow depression sufferer let's not give the idea depression is something that some-one can be buoyed out of. Depression itself can make one isolated and feeling lonely even surrounded by family and friends

DD43 · 19/04/2018 20:29

Agree that David Walliams called himself that as his real name (David Williams,) was already taken. His dad wasn't best pleased apparently. I don't understand why he didn't just stick an initial in there, (Like Harry H Corbett did when HARRY CORBETT had the name already, and Michael J Fox etc...)

LipstickHandbagCoffee · 19/04/2018 20:31

My friend met him down old Compton st in a pub,he was chatty,and In a spontaneous gesture bought a few rounds for our group

MarklahMarklah · 19/04/2018 20:31

I've a dear friend who has clinical and medically non-responsive depression which has cast a huge shadow over her life for the past 20 years. She has a loving partner and a circle of friends but despite the fact that we tell her how much she means to us, it doesn't take away the mental pain and anguish. I know that she has a suicide plan drawn up, but I keep hoping that there will be a way to help her through things. She's currently unwell with some physical problems, and lives on the other side of the world to me, or I'd be at her bedside, offering tea, biscuits and a shoulder to cry on.

WindyWednesday · 19/04/2018 20:32

It’s very difficult when a loved friend disappears into depression. My BFF was a gay man who hid away. I’d bang on his door and call through his letterbox to help him, love him and be there. If someone doesn’t open the door what can you do. Id leave food and bits in his garden so he could get them at night. It’s the most heartbreaking thing.

paceyswife · 19/04/2018 20:33

Have you listened to Steve Allen on LBC - he was a v v good friend to the man and I think in some way saw it coming - interesting to listen too if you think no one gave him the back up he needed when he was alive

Yvest · 19/04/2018 20:34

I’ve seem David Walliams and Dale Winton our together socially on several occasions, by all accounts I think they were genuinely good friends and his sadness is genuine and not just jumping on the bandwagon

ALongHardWinter · 19/04/2018 20:36

I must admit that the first thought that went through my mind when I heard in the early hours of this morning that he had died,was that he may have committed suicide. I had heard a couple of years ago that he suffered from depression,related to his weight issues. Apparently,his mother died of an overdose when he was 21. So sad.

Original poster
poppetpet · 19/04/2018 20:42

Idontdowindow I think a lot of depression stems from low self esteem and feeling worthless - you can feel as if no one really likes you and that they just tolerate you.

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Original poster
poppetpet · 19/04/2018 20:44

SoleBizzz sorry I wasn't accusing - that may have come over as rude when I really wasn't trying to be.

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OlennasWimple · 19/04/2018 20:47

The world would generally be a nicer place with more random acts of kindness and showing appreciation to the people in our lives who we love