I don't go on lots of holidays at all. This will be the first year in my life, or at least since having dc, that I go away for more than one week in the summer.
I have been having an awful time lately, work related, and, towards the end of the Easter holiday, which was impacted by work stresses (I'm a teacher) I became determined to do something to make the next holiday better. Then, just as I was on the crux of booking the only times I could afford, the dc came home mentioning the party - but I still knew nothing concrete about it. I don't think that makes me an especially awful and spiteful person.
I could add that I've had a pretty awful couple of years, due to ex's infidelity, lies about said infidelity, difficulties over contact with the dc (I have consistently gone out of me my way to flexible over this), and failure to pay any CM for them, ever, and nasty texts to me over this. I do know it's not his dm's fault, and this isn't about revenge, but it is all part of why I feel in need of a treat. The May half-term is only one week, and all flights for the first half of it were a lot more expensive. There is no other time I could have gone, unless it was a completely different time, and that would have taken away from the whole purpose of the holiday.
If she/ex had mentioned the party to me as soon as they had a date fixed, which must have been a good while ago, then none of this would have happened. I would have known they were going to it and it wouldn't have occurred to me to back out once I'd agreed they could go, but that never happened. The misunderstanding about my birthday being impacted could also have been avoided had they told me the date properly once they had it.
As I said on the other thread, I constantly have to organise ex having the dc over the holidays as he doesn't bother. Great for me really, as I have them more than he said I would when we split, when he claimed to want 50/50. If he's lied to his mother about us having set times in the holidays to make himself look less of an arse, that isn't my fault either.
I know it's not the main issue, but the dc have no cousins their own age, or none that they have ever met, anyway. I do think it will be a very adult-based event. I have prior experience of similar events with mil, and have no reason to believe they will have an amazing time/are missing out on anything other than amusing themselves after having been paraded around a bit - not the end of the world, and wouldn't have stopped me sending them had I been properly informed with notice, but there's no reason for people who know nothing about it to be wringing their hands about what a marvellous experience they're missing out on, because they're not.