To say BF Mums shouldn't be getting fed if...

[daydrinker]

IF FF Mums aren't?

My local hospital always feeds the BF mums but leaves the FF ones. They have to sort themselves out.

I've been to the local hospital a good few times now with DS and always asked within an hour if I want food

If overnight stay, I'm fed 3 times a day with biscuits and tea in between. Formula feeding mums aren't offered anything.

AIBU to say this isn't fair?

My milk supply doesn't all of a sudden vanish if I'm hungry.

When we stayed on the childrens ward babies who were ff had it provided by the hospital. They can't provide bm so feed mum instead. It's not that illogical. They're ensuring all the babies get fed.

But what if you in as an emergency,and don’t take a bottle with you cos you assume there will be formula on the ward? Do you get shouted at?

Exactly my situation, Curly - it was horrendous. They did have some ready-made bottles you could use (like starter packs)

I don’t think a lot of people understand how difficult it is to leave a baby who’s ill whether bf or ff is.
We were given a private room to ensure DS didn’t get any germs or anything. I once asked the nurses to watch him for 5 mins while I popped to the car, came back and The door was left wide open and DS was in his cot crying. No one was checking in on him and he was completely alone. I shut the door when I got back and no one came in until it was time for his drip to be changed. Now if dp has gone to the shop (30 mins) for food and left him alone, he could’ve had a fit or anything and no one would have known.
It’s all well and good saying the nhs is str why should they etc, but they are so stretched they can’t even keep an eye on a dying newborn then they should at least provide food so that the person with them can.

Someone else can feed a FF baby, a BF mum can’t remove her breasts then leave someone else to feed baby from them.

If the hospital provides formula for the babies it makes perfect sense to provide food for a bf mother too.

It's ridiculous and also alludes to the notion that bf mums are better than ff mums. A breastfeeding mother doesn't have a baby attached to her breast for every second of the day- she is just as capable of leaving to grab a sandwhich from the hospital cafe as a formula feeding mother.

If they aren't going to offer it for all, they shouldn't offer for any IMO

Also as someone else pointed out they provided Formula for free for my son who ended up combination fed as was ‘failure to thrive’.

All patients should be fucking getting food and drink.
Stop playing along with divide and rule. I'm so sick of this bullshit.

Yes YABU because breast feeding requires extra calories. I thought everyone knew this.

Neither mum is the patient thou tbh.

Plus all parents looking after children on a ward should be fed. It's not rocket science.

Just another covert way to “shame” ff mums and make them feel like they are in the wrong. Of course it’s not ok.

This. Especially because often the health problems that have put the child in hospital in the first place may have stopped the BFing. And FF mothers will be bearing an unfair financial burden by being forced to buy expensive food from hospital outlets despite the fact they tend to be poorer anyway.

a BF mum can’t remove her breasts then leave someone else to feed baby from them.

She can pump and put her milk in bottles. This is what most mothers with babies on SCBU have to do as they cannot stay there all the time.

Baby is being fed via the bf mother. So feed the mother. Seems perfectly logical.
When I was breastfeeding, I was ravenous all the time. Little money so ate loads of bread and jam. The deliciousness of those midnight jam sandwiches is still clear in my memory.

I'm really confused. Don't all in patients the UK get fed?

@upstart the op has clarified this is not about when the mothers are patients. All mothers are fed when patients. It's when a child is an inpatient and the mother is with them.

Hmm... I bf my son but only went to the children’s ward with him after he weaned. I wasn’t given meals as I wasn’t breastfeeding. (Also not formula feeding though - in this sense this isn’t about bf vs formula, just about breastfeeding or not?)

We arrived in an ambulance without any money, when we then had to stay in I asked the nurse for some food and she found me (and dh) some sandwiches, but we weren’t officially catered for.

i think you are also assuming that all BF mums can express easily. I had major issues expressing milk in any way and for ds he needed both anyhow to gain weight.
I was also feeding every two hours day and night when we were in hospital with DS

I used to work on a Paeds ward, admittedly in Wales and the policy here was to offer the parents food from the childrens trolley for a nominal sum (a £1) whether they BF or FF their children. There was always free tea and toast on hand for the parents though.

I don’t think a lot of people understand how difficult it is to leave a baby who’s ill whether bf or ff is.

You could say the same about anyone visiting, for example, a terminally-ill patient who may die at any moment, or a sick child.
Hospital visitors don't get fed by the NHS, except in the case of breast-feeding mothers where a lack of nutrition might be detrimental to the patient. Makes perfect sense to me.

All breastfeeding mothers should be fed, and any FF parents who are on their own. I think that's the fairest thing. Obviously a breastfeeding mother can't leave their baby, and neither can a FF parent who is on their own. It's different if some one else is with them who can take over.
Really, staff should be able to use their discretion here as trained HCP's.

Chrys I can remember making tea and toast many times for visitors who were sitting with dying relatives. It's the least we could do.
Obviously ward kitchens aren't really equipped to make proper meals but there should be some provision for visitors, many who also act as carers while they are on the ward.

I had to buy my own food, but that was 26 years ago!

YABVU. They are feeding the patient, the child, by feeding the mother.