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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To say Dh’s farts spoiled our day out?

168 replies

Snap8TheCat · 12/04/2018 15:55

He obviously thinks IABU.

Yesterday we went on a family day out to a historical building. The children are at an age where they really enjoy this sort of place and particularly love history.

We spent the day looking around the buildings and listening to speakers, enjoying artwork, reading plaques and taking photographs etc.

However I feel the day was interrupted by Dh’s noxious gas. God knows what he’d eaten but my goodness it was so embarrassing. We kept having to move on quickly due to the smell. He doesn’t usually emit quite such a foul stench and I appreciate he did need the loo and couldn’t help it.

Aibu to say his farts really did spoil the ambiance and concentration required of the venue? He says he couldn’t help it and so IABU.

OP posts:
Topseyt · 12/04/2018 23:08

Better out than in, surely.

A good fart is very therapeutic, as is a good fart thread, which is long overdue IMHO.

The pearl clutching about it makes me laugh.

AlmostAJillSandwich · 12/04/2018 23:34

I have IBS/suspected IBD and even i can hold them in 90% of the time! Plus i'm lucky in that the almost never smell, but they do sound like an angry duck!
My dad on the other hand, delights in intentionally dropping huge smelly bombs in public, and doesn't care how loud they are. He's impressed by them. If he comes through the livingroom from his bedroom to go to the kitchen, he will deliberately stop, lift his leg, pull a face, fart then do that "ahhhh" noise afterwards, instead of doing it in a room im not in. Even when i'm eating.

If we go out in the car he has a bad habit of farting just as he get in, or just as we're getting to where we're going. I tell him ho disgusting it is and he sometimes pulls the "i can't help it!" line, but that's bollocks.

H should have excused himself from the group and used the bathroom or sat outside, it absolutely DOES ruin the atmosphere and makes you feel sick too. You weren't unreasonable, he was!

AnneWiddecombesHandbag · 12/04/2018 23:48

Omg! I am so immature, I literally have tears rolling down my face at some of these stories!

QuackPorridgeBacon · 13/04/2018 00:05

Poor guy lol if that was me and my partner, I’d have probably pissed myself with laughter (not joking, kids wrecked me) he would have been embarrassed but would have laughed too. I reckon he would have went and found a toilet though while I tried to gather myself. We are pretty chilled about farts in our house though. Don’t keep going on at him though, you love him and it could be upsetting for him after a while. We shouldn’t be so prudish about farts, no one can help it and we all know it’s going to happen, life is too short.

starsandstuff · 13/04/2018 00:21

@MerryMarigold YAbothU for having children who enjoy stately homes.

You made me do a lol GrinGrin

starsandstuff · 13/04/2018 00:23

Actually I'm in love with this whole thread 🤣

Daifuku9 · 13/04/2018 00:57

I’m pretty sure this thread jinxed me. I farted at exercise class tonight. Damn.

8SaltandVinegar · 13/04/2018 10:47

Farts are hilarious, no question. I wonder about people who are disgusted by them. Do they silently give out to themselves when they escape to the loo for 0.5 seconds to drop one?

Back in 2015, I'd only recently started seeing the OH. We went for a lovely meal and I'd two glasses of wine. Afterwards we popped into the shop along the promenade. I suddenly got the most crippling cramp and I knew I badly needed to fart. Made my excuses to himself about checking something in another aisle.

I was full sure it would be a silent but violent one, so I'd no choice but to let it out. Anyway, who follows me but himself just as I let it out. Accept there was nothing silent about it, it was the single most loud fart I'd ever heard. It practically vibrated the aisle. He just looked at me with a mix of shock and laughter on his face. I said I'd to go back to the restaurant and use the loo and dashed out of the place.

I didn't want to leave the toilet and face him outside. I think it was the Dutch courage of the wine that allowed me take the steps to walk back out to the path and see him standing there with the biggest smirk on his face.

To this day he tags me in stuff on articles about the chain of shop we were in, or the area, or farts. I will never live it down.

Chewandswallow · 13/04/2018 12:41

First date with an ex. I asked if I could use his loo, I perched on the edge of the porcelain so he wouldn't hear me pee and finished with one loud fart, screwing my eyes tight shut I thought thank God he's downstairs, and then a voice outside the door said, "Do you want tea or coffee"?

PoorYorick · 13/04/2018 13:00

I wonder about people who are disgusted by them.

Really? I get finding them funny in the right context, but you honestly don't understand why some people find them disgusting? They stink, it's a pretty normal reaction not to want to be around a bad smell.

OliviaStabler · 13/04/2018 13:06

I wonder about people who are disgusted by them

Really? You are happy to be around other people's bowel stink?

We all fart, there is just an appropriate time and a place to doing it and that includes not exposing others to your noxious niffs!

LittleLionMansMummy · 13/04/2018 16:21

Dh does this when we're out shopping. He'll drop a silent one and then move away when another customer is approaching so they think it's me instead. On occasion though he does one that is accidentally loud, looks all surprised like dogs do when they fart and then blames one of the kids.

Beeziekn33ze · 13/04/2018 16:24

Oh dear, I've two embarrassing incidents.

Dear friend's funeral, everyone standing around the grave. The family cast single roses onto the coffin. Then friends were offered roses too, I took one, as did a male friend beside me. As we stepped forward, flowers in hand an unexpected and audible fart popped out. I still am in hope everyone thought it was him, not me.

I was wandering around a charity shop not near the door enough to leave when I felt the need. It was a silent long slow bad smell. An assistant rushed into a back room, grabbed a can and sprayed a foully floral room refresher all around the shop including on me and the only other customer, an old man. He rapidly left and she rushed up to me apologising for spraying me.
She explained 'I'm so sorry I sprayed you, it was that old man, he'd made a terrible smell!' I assured her it was quite all right and have felt guilty ever since. I made the mistake of telling DD and it has become a family legend.

Beeziekn33ze · 13/04/2018 16:26

Anyway as a baby DGS did much worse during lovely calm relaxing baby massage, more than once!

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 13/04/2018 16:27

The sound is funny, the smell is not.

PoorYorick · 13/04/2018 16:32

I can giggle at farts in the right context, but I could never, ever be in one of those 'we Dutch oven each other, we force each other to smell each other's farts' relationships. Great that they work for so many people but I just find the whole idea so revolting and unfunny.

BertrandRussell · 13/04/2018 16:42

Farts can be very funny indeed. But it’s the context that makes them funny.

HoarseMackerel · 13/04/2018 17:04

Thanks for the link ToadOfSadness

I was a bit optimistic when I said they were offered a drink and a cake! Only a drink but I'm wondering if anyone would have had the appetite for a cake anyway! Confused

PoorYorick · 13/04/2018 17:04

My toddler came in this morning and woke us up with a series of farts. That was funny.

Idontevencareanymore · 13/04/2018 18:32

I get its a funny thing when you hear it but when you're trying not to physically vomit due to the smell, not too hilarious eh?

I've got a very sensitive stomach and my husband has actually made it so I have to leave a room when he's let go. Not hard to open a window,not hard to not be around someone when you know you're going to cause it's hardly any impulsive function.

At work I have to ask to go the toilet. I serve food. Would you find it hilarious me serving you while farting and stinking? Or would you be utterly put off the food?

Find it as hilarious as you like in privacy, but in public try and have a tiny bit of respect for others around you. You'd not appreciate my vomit over you as much as I don't appreciate your stink.

MerryMarigold · 14/04/2018 16:31

It genuinely depends on the type. A quick pfft when you're giggling or ticking the kids is one thing. Dh getting breakfast and forcing out really, loud, smelly ones is a completely different thing. I hate those farts which take effort and concentration to push out, not ones just pop out accidentally (which are quite amusing).

RabbityMcRabbit · 14/04/2018 21:22

Does he have IBS? In which caseYABVU

causeimunderyourspell · 14/04/2018 21:25

No advice just wanted to say that I chuckle at this thread title every time I've seen it since you put it on Grin sorry op!

causeimunderyourspell · 14/04/2018 21:25

No advice just wanted to say that I chuckle at this thread title every time I've seen it since you put it on Grin sorry op!