Softzilla: You play; you pay!

[Unreasonableunreasonableness]

Before you all get excited: no party yet (I was trying to keep when it was vague so more anonymous but i give up) . I have had a message from softzilla.
'So are we calm enough to sort this oot for tomorrow? '

She's trying to get your attention by doing something absolutely abhorrent and she has guilt tripped another one of your friends into thinking you're upset by their comment, and therefore making you look like the baddy.

She is absolutely toxic. Hopefully, others will see she is trying to turn them against you and see her for what she is.

She's tried and failed to oust you from the group. Now that that's failed she's going to try and peel other people away from the group so that the group falls apart.

Also, I bet the silence after she asked to talk was because she was expecting you to send friend 1 away, or go outside. She is not, and was not, ever going to say a single word with anyone there to witness it.

OMFG there really is no limit to her evil manipulative behaviour is there?! I mean still obviously gunning for you because the ignorance is pissing off her control freak streak is one thing (and not entirely surprising - but very outing of her batshit psychosis to everyone else), but to then go and completely fabricate a story to intentionally upset a newly pregnant woman??? She really is completely off her rocker. Wtf is wrong with her? She really can't let shit go can she? What sane person does this?? I hope outing friend has been put straight completely now on what has happened? You just need to keep ignoring the nut job. Yes it will piss her off more, but it will ultimately be her downfall when everyone realises just what a vindictive shit she really is. I do hope your genuine friends that have witnessed her evil fuckery are reiterating the facts to others. SF is clearly deranged and dangerous. Ignore and avoid. I really do feel sorry for her kids though - no-one needs a selfish manipulative mum like that. Hugs OP.

I think she has some MH problems op. There is no other explanation. Only thing you can do is carry on explaining what actually happened to those that ask and avoid her as much as possible.
This latest episode sounds like her moving on to another victim.

Wow! I hope NPF (newly pregnant friend) believed you weren't crying. It was nice if her to call. What did she make of it alll?

She wants your attention and she's going to keep trying until she gets a reaction! Sad really but I have known grown women behave like this.

I think you handled the party brilliantly. Especially as you have had a hard few days.

I would tread carefully, however, as there will come a point when people in the friendship group get "drama fatigue," and they might then be prone to dismiss all of this as "just a personality clash," forgetting all the ins and outs and your innocence in it all.

I'm distraught for your pg friend now! What an utterly bitchy thing to do, to tell her that she'd upset you so much you were crying at the party.
I mean, SZ obviously meant it to be a dig at you, but she's really upset pg friend in the process - what a cunt!

I hope you were able to reassure pg friend that you really weren't crying at the party and blaming her for anything (am quite sure that is where SZ was leading with it) - I think SZ is actually digging a very deep hole for herself here and will end up with no friends left if she carries on.

Well done on the party situation and yes, it seems clear that "can we talk" meant "time for you to apologise". FGS, she has zero self-awareness and zero understanding that she is in the wrong here, does she.

I think you do really need to pull right back from her after all of this - block her if necessary - because she's going to just keep on and on and on and on and ON.

My word, she really is the gift that keeps on giving!

What Thumb said. Hope you’re ok

She's a classic narc imo. You can read post after post about parents like that on the Stately Homes thread. I do feel so sad for her DCs.

Bloody HELL. That’s just vindictive. I hope you told your friend that there was backstory between you and SZ, to explain why she’s such a lying piece of work.

She's absolutely venomous!

You have to block her, she’s dangerous & poisonous. Remove her from your life, be civil when you have mutual activities. You have enough going on without dealing with this craziness.

Oh and I hope your poor outing friend realises what’s going on. God softzilla is a terrible person.

Sounds like softzilla has moved onto outing friend now. Her behaviour isn't personal, she's just a stirrer. On a more serious note, it sounds as if she doesn't know how to conduct normal friendships, perhaps because she's never had any real friends, so throw a bit of pity at her.

You don't suppose she still want the money she thinks you should have paid for the pleasure of her company, do you?

I severely doubt that softzilla will have seen this thread.

Don't be so sure.

You've said 'party friend' is loving being referred to as that so you've clearly told people about it.

Your group of friend sound incredibly immature so, even if she hasn't seen it yet, it's only a matter of time before the playground gossip filters through.

Does Softzilla have a DH or DP in this or has she maybe eaten him? Feel sorry for him as well as her DC.

What can it be like to live with, day in day out, week after week. I’m exhausted just reading your updates.

Sorry, but what is "wendy-ing"?
SZ is going to end up very lonely and blame everyone else...

Wow, this is actually starting to sound stalkerish. I'd give this woman a wide berth.

There genuinely are people who are this manipulative and spiteful. They absolutely thrive on drama and chaos, pitting friends against each other and constantly stirring. They are mercifully quite few and far between (there are more people who are at a lower level of tiresome but usually move on when they're not getting enough of a reaction.)

The rest of your group sound pretty sensible, actually. They are not likely to be taken in by her bullshit, but neither are any of them trying to further stir the pot.

Well you can’t fault her instincts, she found your vulnerable spot and tried to exploit it. What a good job NPF contacted you directly and you were able to give her the real story. I hope the others in the group have the good sense to come to you if she tries this trick again.

The handshake was just weird, (unless you are in fact eleven year old boys and it’s 1953) but at least you weren’t asked to hug it out!

Sorry, but what is "wendy-ing"?

Wendy works her way into a group and then 'ousts' the original friidea be from the group effectively taking over (generally being the organiser and everyone's best friend)

Seen in plenty of movies!!!

Wendy was used as persons name on a thread hence the use

I hope your 'Outing' friend.. understands the calculating behaviour that SZ tried to used to manipulate her... and you ... damn she's nasty ..

I hope your feeling okay OP... your certainly the sole target of her venom even after her 'fake friends' handshake ... no wonder you're exhausted with the whole carry on..