Softzilla: You play; you pay!

[Unreasonableunreasonableness]

Before you all get excited: no party yet (I was trying to keep when it was vague so more anonymous but i give up) . I have had a message from softzilla.
'So are we calm enough to sort this oot for tomorrow? '

Good luck at the party, hold your head up high!
Party Mum - you are awesome.
Softzilla - eh?!?

Sorry posted to soon.

Hope every thing goes ok this afternoon and your DD enjoys herself.

Hi OP, I had similar situation once where a friend in a group of friends engaged in a bizzare and prolonged personal attack. This was the second time he had done this. The first time I apologised (even though I hadn't done anything to apologise for) if I had caused offence. He accepted it and it was fine and meant all was well when we met as a group. The second time I decided to just cut him dead from then on, rather than become his perpetual whipping girl. Tbh I never felt the same in the group again when he was there and eventually stopped going to the group. I was just aware of 'it' the whole time.

Only you can decide what is in your comfort zone. Whether you want to be able to talk politely with this woman when you are in a group or whether you want to ignore her completely.

I wouldn't be surprised if Softzilla doesn't turn up to the party.

OP you have handled this really well.

Softzilla is ridiculous. I don't know what planet she thinks she is living on. Unfortunately, there is no reasoning with some people and they just refuse to see when they are wrong. She has deliberately stirred this up to cause a drama and try and make you feel uncomfortable. You have kept calm and dignified through this.

So glad you have good supportive friends at this time. Go to the party with your head held high and hope your DD has a nice time.

Things will get better

Both threads kept me up last night. Unreasonable you have been very reasonable indeed. Don't pay attention to the KC-whatever comment: there is always one! I think Softzilla must know about your fertility issue - you mentioned that you were both part of the same parents group online? Which makes her not just a CF but a despicable, cruel being for continuing with her pointless vendetta after knowing what you're going through. Sending you love and hugs and good luck for tonight.
And thank you to the poster explaining so well MH (sorry can't remember name). Also Vlad and Vanka fan here 😁

Friend 1, party mum and friend 3 are heading round here for lunch and will all turn up together.
I have had a message from softzilla asking to meet up for lunch before the party so we can 'talk things over and go together'. I have messaged back saying I don't feel we need to do this and that I have plans for lunch. I've since had a couple of calls from her but haven't picked up.

She must be bricking it! Bet her child develops a sudden attack of D&V....

Oh dearie dear, what a shame!
She's so desperate.
I also doubt she'll come now, but we'll see.

I've never been more excited about a party I'm not going to!

There is nothing MN loves more than the smell of freshly chargrilled Zilla

Nothing can bring a thread to 500 posts plus so quickly.

Uh oh, she's really panicking isn't she? Have a great time at the party - just be careful not to allow her to corner you alone or I can see an attempt to engineer a scene which she will try to say you started or just plain lies about what you've said to her.

All you need to say is 'please drop this, it's done, let's move on' and never see her on her own again.

shes a muppet !

'I have had a message from softzilla asking to meet up for lunch before the party'
Maybe she was hoping for a free lunch : )

I suspect she’s going to front it out. She doesn’t think she’s done anything wrong

Maybe she was hoping for a free lunch : )

Reply to her lunch request "who is paying...?"

I've since had a couple of calls from her but haven't picked up

There's probably a way you can actually block her number if it's stressing you out seeing her ringing you all of the time...

How do people have the energy for all this drama about who pays for a softplay? I'm exhausted just reading about it all.

You are very lucky to have such a wonderful set of caring friends!

I hope they continue to show their support (hugs to them)

I know how difficult it can be but think of her as someone in the room you've not even noticed fake it til you make it and all that!

I would guess the meeting for lunch was more about arriving together. So she can do the whole "storm in a teacup, we're all friends here lalala" as she sees it's not going as she thought.

She sounds totally cray cray. Hope the party goes well and she finally drops this and moves on. You must be knackered hearing about this rubbish.

What time's the party?
(And as an aside...what is place marking, and why is it something to be ashamed of?) (Sorry, I asked somewhere else but didn't get an answer!)(as you were!)(thank you)

Maybe she was hoping for a free lunch : )

By softzilla s rules, she should pay herself. That would be an interesting meet.

How you enjoy the party op!

You will be turning up with Party Mum???

Oh that's fabulous!