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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have called 101 about this prick?

116 replies

VelvetSpoon · 07/04/2018 19:43

Background- I don't get on with my neighbours. I've posted about this before. They've got 4 undisciplined kids in a tiny house. The kids (all under 10) do as they please, are constantly in the garden hanging over my fence or climbing on it. They also ride their bikes across my front garden, draw in chalk on my drive, blah blah. The parents are the my kid can do no wrong types but also leave them outside unsupervised all the time So don't see most of this.

Anyway the main issue is they are always chucking toys over and kicking their ball over. I used to throw it back. But it was constant. And they then took to climbing over themselves. So I stopped.

A couple of days ago the ball came over. Yesterday we were in the garden, (actually carrying some heavy stuff so no free hands) one of the kids yells 'give me my ball'. I don't respond to kids speaking like that so we ignored them. Later they're all out in the street with their mates (another group of even more annoying kids who live opposite) yelling we want out ball. We'll make you give it back and general name calling. All of which we ignored and didn't react to.

Today we're in the side alley putting up fence panels. The dad of kids over the road marches over onto my property, asking why we had a go at his kids yesterday. Assured him we said nothing. He says he'll let it go this time but we need to watch ourselves. I said excuse me is that a threat, who did he think he was? To which he went off alarming, f ing and blinding all over the shop, shouting at me I better watch myself, we'd see what happened to us for causing trouble. I said fine you're threatening me I'll call the police. He carried on a bit longer then went off telling us to watch ourselves, taking his 2 teenage boys he'd brought with him for back up.

After this I end up having round 2 with the guy next door (who is not aggressive just irritating) and while I'm having a relatively civil conversation with him, his shrew of a wife shouts out 'don't talk to her she's crazy she's got mental problems she's a loony

All this was in the street/ on my drive in front of my teen DC.

So I've called 101 on guy over the road. AIBU to have done so? And WIBU to also tell the police about the gobby cow next door?

OP posts:
TabbyMack · 07/04/2018 19:47

You called the police to inform them that your neighbours don’t like you?

How pathetic.

RunMummyRun68 · 07/04/2018 19:48

Oh dear

I think I'd move op

HotSauceCommittee · 07/04/2018 19:49

YANBU. He just committed a public order offence by shouting and swearing at you. His children are also behaving anti socially on what sounds like a regular basis.
Report every incident. He is one of Those aggressive types with little self control who will want to punch your male partner (if you have one), just for being your male partner.
Are they private owners? If not, report them to their housing association.
Ask the cops if the local beat team to come and have a word before it escalates. Honestly, you don’t need the stress with these types. He’s had his cage rattled and is all puffed up and has to be seen to “win” now.

DoctorWhatTheFuck · 07/04/2018 19:50

we'd see what happened to us for causing trouble

OP called because she was threatened.

TerranceandPhilip · 07/04/2018 19:50

The police. Being more "adulty" adults since Victorian times...

HotSauceCommittee · 07/04/2018 19:52

DOnt mention the other neighbour though; you don’t want to be seen to be the common denominator.
Shouting and swearing and behaving aggressively to you is not normal, acceptable behaviour. Do not tolerate it and REPORT EVERY INCIDENT.
I deal with these kind of things in my line of work.

notapizzaeater · 07/04/2018 19:53

Are they rented or owners ? If rented can you speak to the landlord. Tbh I think I'd move house, life's too short to life with idiots like this

TabbyMack · 07/04/2018 19:55

He just committed a public order offence

No. It takes more than a bit of effing and blinding for that.

It astonishes me that MNers genuinely think the police are gagging at the bit to show up to their petty neighbour squabbles. All they would do in this instance is tell the lot of you to stay stay from each other. Then they’d go and deal with some real crime Hmm

maxthemartian · 07/04/2018 20:03

I'd also have phoned the police if my neighbour threatened me.

sockunicorn · 07/04/2018 20:04

Nobody should have to be shouted at in their street. I think you did the right thing and, hopefully, knowing the police will be rung will encourage them to simmer down and not abuse you on your own driveway. However I would also consider moving OP before they get more aggressive/damage your property

Lizzie48 · 07/04/2018 20:07

The neighbour's warning to 'watch yourself' does sound like a threat, I agree. Although your comment about the other neighbour being 'irritating' does make it sound like you play a part in this yourself. Hmm

Wondermoomin · 07/04/2018 20:08

I think you did the right thing. Well done for standing up to the man in a dignified way when he was trying to bully you with the back up of 2 teenage males as well. What a man Hmm

Scrumptiousbears · 07/04/2018 20:09

A long boring story but true. We have a lady living opposite who insists on parking on the public road outside her house. She has a drive for 3 cars but prefers the road. Anyone who parks outside her house she shouts and screams at. 🤷🏼‍♀️ that was until one day she got in her car and drove at the poor woman who dared to park outside her house and ran her over. Now if all the previous incidents had been reported and logged there would have been a documented record of behaviour.

NotTerfNorCis · 07/04/2018 20:10

Yes report it. People like that need sorting out. It's not just you who's going to suffer because of his and his kids' behaviour.

RebeccaBunchLawyer · 07/04/2018 20:11

Please get CCTV put up, OP. And then a ‘for sale’ sign. They sound like absolute trouble.

What a rude you know what that vile man is. No wonder his children have turned out to be such revolting little turds!

greathat · 07/04/2018 20:13

Yes he sounds awful YWNBU

pimlicolife · 07/04/2018 20:13

Just throw the call back. It's not worth escalating things.

TerranceandPhilip · 07/04/2018 20:14

He just committed a public order offence. No. It takes more than a bit of effing and blinding for that. It astonishes me that MNers genuinely think the police are gagging at the bit to show up to their petty neighbour squabbles. All they would do in this instance is tell the lot of you to stay stay from each other. Then they’d go and deal with some real crime

Exactly right

DeathStare · 07/04/2018 20:16

DOnt mention the other neighbour though; you don’t want to be seen to be the common denominator

To be honest that was my first thought.

Don't get me wrong - your neighbour was completely out of order. He shouldn't have shouted and sworn at you and he definitely shouldn't have threatened you. And you were right to report that to that police.

But it seems unusual to have three neighbours who all don't like you and think your behaviour has been unreasonable. maybe you need to think about what you could change in order to have some neighbourly harmony.

Winterdown · 07/04/2018 20:17

I have four active, young children. Our childfree neighbour hates us. lol.

Winterdown · 07/04/2018 20:19

sounds like attached housing. That sucks. Too many people in too tight a spot. We were never meant to live on top of one another. I will be moving to a detached home soon. You have my sympathies!

Original poster
VelvetSpoon · 07/04/2018 20:19

Shouting and swearing because you can't articulate your point another way is a bit common but I wasn't reporting that. I was reporting what was very clearly not one but several threats. That we should watch ourselves or we'd see what happened next time. We'd regret calling the police, I could go on but you get the gist from my OP.

As a DV survivor I won't stand for being threatened or men behaving aggressively to me. My sons were quite worried after. Especially as the knobber has been patrolling the pavement outside his house since. I think in an attempt to intimidate us.

Twat over the road is housing assoc I believe. Next door own their house as do I. I am planning to move but not for 3-5 years. I've lived here longer than either of these families. It was a nice area when I moved in.

OP posts:
NotTerfNorCis · 07/04/2018 20:20

He sounds like a neighbour of mine, who moved, thank God. His name isn't Jeremy is it?

Winterdown · 07/04/2018 20:20

I will say, however, that if you can ignore one bad incident, instead of reporting it, you may make life easier for yourself. This idiot neighbour might have just had a bad diagnosis, or lost his job. When you call the police... well... it will make things more difficult and awkward for yourself in the short term. Yes, I have been tempted to call "bylaw officers' many times but sometimes, if I wait a day, it passes. My sympathies to you.

MammaTJ · 07/04/2018 20:21

No, he actually threatened her.. He says he'll let it go this time but we need to watch ourselves. It won't be viewed as a direct threat, so will result in no immediate action, but it is worth noting!