To have called 101 about this prick?

[VelvetSpoon]

Background- I don't get on with my neighbours. I've posted about this before. They've got 4 undisciplined kids in a tiny house. The kids (all under 10) do as they please, are constantly in the garden hanging over my fence or climbing on it. They also ride their bikes across my front garden, draw in chalk on my drive, blah blah. The parents are the my kid can do no wrong types but also leave them outside unsupervised all the time So don't see most of this.

Anyway the main issue is they are always chucking toys over and kicking their ball over. I used to throw it back. But it was constant. And they then took to climbing over themselves. So I stopped.

A couple of days ago the ball came over. Yesterday we were in the garden, (actually carrying some heavy stuff so no free hands) one of the kids yells 'give me my ball'. I don't respond to kids speaking like that so we ignored them. Later they're all out in the street with their mates (another group of even more annoying kids who live opposite) yelling we want out ball. We'll make you give it back and general name calling. All of which we ignored and didn't react to.

Today we're in the side alley putting up fence panels. The dad of kids over the road marches over onto my property, asking why we had a go at his kids yesterday. Assured him we said nothing. He says he'll let it go this time but we need to watch ourselves. I said excuse me is that a threat, who did he think he was? To which he went off alarming, f ing and blinding all over the shop, shouting at me I better watch myself, we'd see what happened to us for causing trouble. I said fine you're threatening me I'll call the police. He carried on a bit longer then went off telling us to watch ourselves, taking his 2 teenage boys he'd brought with him for back up.

After this I end up having round 2 with the guy next door (who is not aggressive just irritating) and while I'm having a relatively civil conversation with him, his shrew of a wife shouts out 'don't talk to her she's crazy she's got mental problems she's a loony

All this was in the street/ on my drive in front of my teen DC.

So I've called 101 on guy over the road. AIBU to have done so? And WIBU to also tell the police about the gobby cow next door?

but surely some of the disputes can be dealt with in a civilised way?

You can't be civil with the uncivilized

We've had crap neighbours always loud parties, sofa on the front lawn, drinking all day Saturday, fights all Saturday night, police round every other week, drug use, dodgy people dropping by all times day and night

Bloody awful!

Moving isn't really an option right now. Plus I'm mindful that mindless idiots like this exist anywhere. I could end up with someone just as bad in my next house!

I'm afraid that is true. But you obviously get on with the others on the street, so odds are that you wouldn't have to put up with it if you did move.

You never know, police involvement might make them back off, at least for a while.

greentulips I forgot about the front garden sofa! Him over the road had one of those too on his lawn. And a fridge. At one point they even had a bath in their front garden which they were keeping baby ducks in (I kid you not!) til someone complained...!

Ours had a pony in a very tiny yard! Sometimes they walked it over the park and tied it up there for the day!

(Sorry competitive crap neighbours thread)

”I have four children under eight. We are professionals and owners, we have paid off our home. We aren't vagrants, alcoholics or abusers, lol. However, my children are LOUD. They yell and scream at each other. They kick balls over fences. They take rocks as "souvenirs" from the neighbours garden. You can hear them at bedtime outside the house. My neighbours hate me, I am sure.”

@Winterdown - you make it sound as if you don’t care about the impact your children are having on your neighbours, and if that is the case, how can you justify it? No-one reasonable expects children to be silent and invisible - children do make noise (and in my opinion, the normal noise of children playing is a happy sound, and one I welcome), but it is not reasonable for anyone to think that their children can make as much noise as they want, or behave in other antisocial ways (going into the neighbours’ gardens and taking things, for example), and that they, the parents have no responsibility to moderate their children’s behaviour, or teach them a modicum of manners and self control.

I had three boys under eight years old, and I can guarantee that my children didn’t make our neighbours hate us. Yes, they played outside, and made noise, and sometimes balls went over next door, but it was mine and dh’s job as parents to keep their behaviour within acceptable limits.

There is no way I would have let them take rocks from a neighbour’s garden, let alone near-boasted about it on a public forum. If I thought my children’s noise and behaviour was making the neighbours hate us, I would be ashamed of it - not stating it public ally with (apparently) no shame.

I think the pony wins I hope for your sake they've moved now!

This reminds me a couple of weeks ago I had to collect some furniture I'd bought on Shpock from an estate in the rougher part of town, DS2 cane with me to help load it into the car. As we drove through the estate, he said oh they've got a horse in that house over there. I assumed he meant they had a horsebox on the drive. No, on the way back we passed and I saw the little pony eating hay in their front garden! I'm sure their neighbours must be delighted.

At least over the road haven't got a horse. Yet.

my children are LOUD. They yell and scream at each other. They kick balls over fences. They take rocks as "souvenirs" from the neighbours garden. You can hear them at bedtime outside the house.

And have you taken steps to try to moderate this behaviour?

My neighbours hate me, I am sure. Well, yes. Stands to reason.

TBH OP, your title "To have called 101 about this prick?" tells me more about the situation than the story you've written.

Really NewYear? Do enlighten me. I didn't call him a prick to his face. I didn't swear at him. Though he swore and shouted and threatened me. I'd say thinking he's a prick after that is pretty tame. What words would you instead deem appropriate for a man who bullies, threatens and tries to physically intimidate a woman?

And just to be clear, I've written the facts as they happened. Not a story. Hope that clarifies it for you

As yet my neighbours for the most part have been OK, but the last two sets in the UK have been barking. One woman couldn't fathom why I didn't welcome her child opening my back gate and whizzing round my patios on my scooter ('aww, she's just exploring'), and the other didn't like my garden and constantly nagged me about it. I was having some work done in the house meaning I had plumbers vans etc on the drive (which we own, but she had access over). She was selling her house and was most put out that I wouldn't ask the plumber to move his van as it made the drive look untidy.

Pressed send too soon. I don't blame you in the least OP,as it can make it unpleasant to live like that, and why should you have to? I also agree with not returning the balls instantly, an expectation is et up that you will always do so.

I have four children under eight. We are professionals and owners, we have paid off our home

So ? Just because you own your home outright doesn't mean you have the right to allow your children do run riot . I'm sure your neighbours do think they're a pain in the arse.

You can't be civilised with the uncivilised

So, so true. The thing is, if you were dealing with reasonable people, it would never get to this level.

Reasonable people are mortified when asked, politely, for the first time, to turn down their music at 0100 as it's making the upstairs neighbours' floor vibrate. They don't then take that as a cue to launch a noise war which leads to the police being involved.

OP, YADNBU. As proven by the fact that the police took you seriously and didn't tell you to get a grip. People shouldn't be able to go around threatening people with no consequences.

I have four children under eight. We are professionals and owners, we have paid off our home

But you don't own your neighbours' property, do you? Your DCs should never go into their gardens, it's called trespassing. My DDs are both very lively and a handful, but it would never occur to them to barge into a neighbour's garden.

They take rocks as "souvenirs" from the neighbours garden.

Do you think it’s ok for your kids to be in the neighbors gardens?
Professionals can be nightmare neighbours too.

Good on you Op, shit neighbours Make your life hell. I remember living in a particularly crap mixed block and having an illegal cigarette racket going on upstairs, drugs being dealt from over the hall, dogs shitting and pissing inside, humans vomiting in the Hall, all night karaoke etc etc. Hellish.
Where I live now is full of kids but remarkably they all manage to just play out, make normal child noise and not disturb the whole street.

I really think this is why we now have so many problems in society - people just don't understand what being reasonable , polite and considerate means any more .

I have four children under eight. We are professionals and owners, we have paid off our home. We aren't vagrants, alcoholics or abusers, lol. However, my children are LOUD. They yell and scream at each other. They kick balls over fences. They take rocks as "souvenirs" from the neighbours garden. You can hear them at bedtime outside the house. My neighbours hate me, I am sure. Yes, I think everyone else is pretty sure as well. But don't worry, when your boisterous little rascals turn into over indulged anti social teenagers who think it's perfectly fine to do exactly what they want and take whatever they want with no consequences, you can just tell the police that you own your home outright and everything will be just dandy.

They take rocks as "souvenirs" from the neighbours garden

God, if you lived next to me your little darlings could have all the rocks they wanted from my garden, albeit via your living room windows

I sympathise OP. My neighbour was punched for keeping a ball than was constantly kicked in to his front garden and damaged his car. The father of the spoilt brat knocked him to the floor and it all went to court . Neighbour to the other side collected 20 tennis balls from my garden one day - I left my side gate open I was so fed up. DH did swear at the father when a cricket ball hit our parasol which we were sitting under. The next summer a cricket ball hit our garage window, smashing it to bits. They paid for it They have stopped cricket now.

when your boisterous little rascals turn into over indulged anti social teenagers who think it's perfectly fine to do exactly what they want and take whatever they want with no consequences, you can just tell the police that you own your home outright and everything will be just dandy.

I agree OP you should not have to be threatened and made to feel intimidated in your own home. I also agree with you not throwing the ball back until they ask politely or until when you have time.

Make sure you keep a diary from the very start just in case it escalates which is something the police and housing will advise you to do as well.

It sounds as if you're now living amongst feral families who haven't a clue how to bring up children probably or conduct themselves in a civilised manner.

If the prick across the road is in a rented Housing Association property then make sure you report the incident and any others to the housing officer. There will be conditions within his tenancy agreement about behaviour.

Yes to cctv.

@Winterdown You have my sympathies. It's hard to be an owner in a street full of renters or what have you.
However, my children are LOUD. They yell and scream at each other. They kick balls over fences. They take rocks as "souvenirs" from the neighbours garden. You can hear them at bedtime outside the house.

Explain please what exactly are you saying about 'renters'?
I'm a 'renter' (we previously were homeowners) and we have 5 kids. They do not kick the balls over fences and most certainly do not take souvenirs of any description from the neighbour's gardens!
Also when it's bedtime (and we are surrounded by younger families) you can not hear them outside!
So how is it 'hard to be an owner in a street full of renters' with people like me?

Not sure why so much is highlighted!
Only Winterdown's comments were supposed to be