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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I’m not, am I?

145 replies

MaiaRindell · 01/04/2018 22:09

I’m taking my two DDs (8 and 11) to Orlando on Friday. ExDH has booked a last minute trip to Disneyland Paris tomorrow. He hasn’t told me this

OP posts:
Smithlets80 · 02/04/2018 09:01

I hope everything works out for you and your dds. Just for future reference: I had the same worry about my exh cancelling passports. I called the Passport Office for advice and you can have a block put on the passports so that only you can cancel or reapply in your children’s names.

Original poster
MaiaRindell · 02/04/2018 10:54

NotTakenUserName I really wrestled with things. I put underwear, PJs, socks and spare leggings in a carrier bag. They are all things that would not be missed if "lost".
To whoever asked about coats, they left from my house so had coats on.
Smithlets I will look into that.
No sign of the child support yet. I will see.
This is just the latest in a list of things. On Saturday, he implied to them that I had an affair. I didn't.

OP posts:
froomeonthebroom · 02/04/2018 11:04

At least now they've gone you can forget about arseface ex and focus on your amazing holiday! Have you been to Florida before? It's my favourite place in the world and I'm sure you'll have a brilliant time.

SecretBum · 02/04/2018 11:07

He sounds like an arse. Of course YANBU - why DLP? Why no notice? He's obviously trying to make a point or piss on your trip or both.

The clothes and child support aren't the main issue IMO. I would not, under any circumstances be willing to hand their passports over to him 4 days before such a big holiday.

ItsNachoCheese · 02/04/2018 11:08

Yanbu at all its like he thinks he can sneak in a trip to disneyland paris and it will beat orlando. Orlando wins hands down every time there is no contest

0hCrepe · 02/04/2018 11:09

What a nobend.

Idontdowindows · 02/04/2018 11:09

They have clothes at his house, so he can pack those.

He's being a stupidface.

femfemlicious · 02/04/2018 11:17

I hate men. They are so selfish, lazy and assholish Angry

HonkyWonkWoman · 02/04/2018 11:17

I just think, poor kids.
It's them who are going to be upset not having clothes packed for their trip.
Can you not stop the bickering about clothes and who's packing them and Who loses them, for the sake of the children?
Just do the right thing for the children!

SparklyMagpie · 02/04/2018 11:17

What an absolute dick

Lacucuracha · 02/04/2018 11:17

Can't you go via CMS for maintenance? He is holding you to ransom.

Lacucuracha · 02/04/2018 11:19

Honky

Where does it stop though? OP has to put her down sometime.

Original poster
MaiaRindell · 02/04/2018 11:49

HonkyWonkWoman The children are getting two amazing holidays. They are not suffering!

  • I told him last July that I would no longer be packing
  • He never asked or even checked I would be packing this time. It never occurred to me that he expected this until 10pm last night.
  • They have full wardrobes of clothes at his house
  • I am packing for a holiday on Friday myself and don't expect him to provide clothes
  • Any clothes I would have packed are dirty/wet/packed for Florida

Now, he has packed clothes from his house. I packed underwear, legging and PJs

OP posts:
bluebeck · 02/04/2018 12:02

Sorry I am a bit confused.

If he hasn't told you they are going to Paris, how are you meant to know and to have packed?

I would be really concerned about their passports tbh......

Original poster
MaiaRindell · 02/04/2018 12:12

bluebeck This confuses me too. I only know where they are going because the kids said they had to take their passports. I thought he was taking them to Centerparcs.

OP posts:
AbeautifulBeast · 02/04/2018 12:32

maia lots of posters have asked if you are concerned about the children's passports.... I know I would be?!

Original poster
MaiaRindell · 02/04/2018 12:47

AbeautifulBeast I said up the thread that I have taken out super-douper travel insurance since I found out he was taking them abroad. There isn't anything else I can do other than keep my fingers crossed. It's awful timing.

OP posts:
RandomMess · 02/04/2018 12:59

Hope he's packed wet weather gear Grin

Keep those texts as evidence!

NotTakenUsername · 02/04/2018 14:54

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Lacucuracha · 02/04/2018 16:24

Well said @NotTakenUsername

Makingdinner · 02/04/2018 16:26

It might not be fair on your but just pack the clothes ffs. They are for your children. Take the moral high ground no matter how much of a dick he's being. You'd be jusy as much of a dick for not sending any imo.

Makingdinner · 02/04/2018 16:27

And nacho it's not a competition though is it? Christ.

Gemini69 · 02/04/2018 16:31

OP has behaved impeccably well considering the SHIT she takes from this Clown... well done OP Flowers

BlondeB83 · 02/04/2018 16:33

What an arse! Just take it as a warm up to the real thing OP. YADNBU

Lacucuracha · 02/04/2018 16:37

@MakingDinner

Yes, because everyone has unlimited funds to replace clothes that go missing at their dickhead ex's.

His actions are deliberate provocation. OP needs to stand up to him.