To think this is an april fools joke gone too far!

[Gabbyleo]

I've had enough really. out of any day not Easter. My DCs 8, 5 and 3 have been waiting patiently all month for their chocolate eggs. I wake up this morning to find the Easter eggs all eaten with the the boxing left in the cupboard , the wrappers inside with one smarty, button or malteser left . I put it on the top of the cupboard so only DH and the DS 1&2 (18 and 15) could reach them. I go up to DS room and they were pretending to sleep. I wake them up and they admitted to eating all the Easter eggs. there was 8 of them! I cant actually believe it! They said they were planning to go to shop and buy some replacements but it was closed. They claimed it was an 'April Fool joke but went wrong'. The worst thing was they both found it funny I've told them they have to apologise to younger DCs. That there consoles and phones will be confiscated for all Easter break and that they are grounded and won't be going to any of their friends house. April Fools jokes are supposed to be funny! DH told me in going too far but I don't care sick of them treating the younger ones like shit. Rant over.

So now the older boys have been rewarded for stealing eggs with extra eggs? They've still got their technology. There have been no consequences - in fact they've ended up with more than they would have had.

It's no wonder their behaviour is so shitty when their father encourages it.

OP is seeing their behaviour as part of a pattern, while her DH sees it as a one-off. Time for some serious talking I think.

I feel a little bit sorry for the older two having a father like him. It must be so confusing for them. They probably dont know whether they are coming or going.

OP i would seriously think about the future of your marriage. Your dh doesnt seem to respect you.

Please can any of those posters who think its funny or say" it was a joke that backfired " please tell me what is funny about 2 teenagers eating their siblings eggs ( and not even replacing ) ? Especially one that was given to OP's DD for her good behaviour and hard work?

I love a good joke/prank but fucking hell, that was pure nasty, why would you want to upset your little brothers and sisters who you should be setting a good example to

And as for your "D"H, he's just as bad and as it's not the first episode of behaviour like this, yes I would be thinking about the future

They've all taken the piss out of you and their siblings/children

I agree Reboot, with an immature "prankster" father and inconsistent consequences they probably don't have a clear view of right and wrong.

This is not helping them as they enter adulthood where consequences can suddenly become very real and far reaching.

"DD 8 actually won one of the eggs from school for her good work and behavior. Hey didn't even have the decency to leave that one"

That is heartbreaking.

So their dad wasn't in on it, but maybe no consequences means that they "push boundaries"?

That said, at 15 & 18-do they really need telling that it's shitty behaviour-especially to younger siblings?

UPDATE

I made the mistake of getting into another argument with DSs I'm which I told them I would tell MIL about their behavior when we see her. DS18 went on a rant saying that in causing drama and I just want everyone to hate him (which makes no sense whatsoever). MIL is paying for DS driving lessons and said they of there is any bad behavior she will stop paying for it. DS knows what she will do once she finds out. DS15 started having go at me said I'm being a 'stupid bitch'. That seemed to hit a switch in DH who told him 'not to talk to me like that again' and took his phone away. He said 'their behavior today has been sickening'. Finally actually giving them a good telling off. After the whole ordeal I told dh me and him need to be on the same page in which he agreed. Then apologised for buying then the chocolate eggs.

This is supposed to be a family day in which we spend together and be happy. It instead turned to a stupid family drama. I feel sorry the younger DCs let's hope they have fun at MIL with their cousins. Thanks all for the help.

Plus DS15 is now refusing to go to MIL unless he gets his phone back.

MIL is paying for DS driving lessons and said they of there is any bad behavior she will stop paying for it. DS knows what she will do once she finds out
He should've thought about that before shouldn't he. He behaved appallingly and needs to deal with the consequences. If he has a job he can pay for his own driving lessons.

How long are you going to be at MiL's? A couple of hours sitting on the front step with no phone might be just the thing for him!

Well your oldest is earning money & not paying rent so what's the big deal about paying for his own lessons?

As for what the 15yr old called you...

I’m glad that he’s backed you up - although because it was delayed I suspect they’ll blame you for his change of heart. I think when it’s calmed down a bit you need to speak to him privately about supporting you with discipline. At the moment he keeps undermining you which is why the older kids think they can get away with behaviour like this.

Absolutely tell MIL and let DS15 stay home.

What consequences will he face for calling you a stupid bitch? shame it took this to get DH on side.

Losing his phone for a few days is not adequate punishment.

@FairiesVsPixies

It is no coincidence that 2 of the younger DC are girls and are being treated like this.

Erm, yes I think it is coincidence, actually. ONE of the younger children is a BOY. This is not remotely about sexism hmm

Unfortunately, it often IS about sexism. My brothers are older than me by 6 and 11 years and they did think they were important than girls.

Given OP's update about the stupid bitch comment, I would watch out for any misogynistic behaviour towards the girls especially.

Say to 15 year old: ‘fine stay here.’ Then proceeds to take all the cables of the TVs, computers/laptop and phone. He can stay home and be bored.

Is there a chance that DH may have suddenly changed his tune in an effort to persuade you not to tell MIL what the older two have done, and thereby keep her onside with regard to the driving lessons? Regardless, make sure you do indeed tell her. If she cancels the lessons, he might appreciate that there are consequences for bad behaviour.
And leave DS15 home alone without his phone. Take any other attractive electronics with you too.
Have either of them actually apologised yet? Both of them for eating the eggs, and DS15 for calling you a stupid bitch?

agree leave 15 year old at home. for me, calling his mother " a stupid bitch" is an even worse offence, than the egg eating.

I agree with what you've said

Your 15 yo son calling you a stupid bitch I don't even know what to say to that. Absolutely disgusting behaviour and it took that to get your "D"H on side?!?

Jesus I never ever and still would never say something like that infront of my dad and I'm 27. He would hit the roof, infact from the beginning he'd have been the one dealing the punishments and not allowing behaviour like that but then I or my younger brother would never have pulled a stunt like this to my second youngest brother

Who do these boys think they are? And your 18 year old should be paying for his driving lessons and I hope your MIL puts the money she would have spent towards something nice or a little something for your younger children

At least DH seems to be backing you up now.
The thing is, if they'd faced a united front and appropriate consequences earlier this morning you could have drawn a line under it, hopefully with a lot less drama. The younger DCs would have had their Easter eggs, the older had a telling off and eg phones removed and had to buy replacements, and you could have moved on with the day.
As it is it's now all blown up and got put of hand. Hopefully you can salvage the rest of the day, and have a quiet discussion with DH later re dealing with poor behaviour going forward.

And I'm agreeing with what you wrote @Leeds2

I think you need serious chats with your dh about backing you up. The elder two need a serious sanction, taking phones away is not enough.

Why are you paying for the 18 year’s old when he’s working? Why is he not paying at least a nominal rent?

I would leave both older boys at home, no phones, no console, no screen time, they can man up and start doing their own cooking, jobs etc. I would go to the absolute nth degree over being called a stupid bitch. Their dad needs to realise that their disgusting behaviour is because he does not punish. Good cop bad cop works when they’re little, not when they’re virtually adults. He cannot be ‘down’ with the boys, he needs to parent them, not be their friend.

Absolutely tell mil everything. They cannot get away with this behaviour.
'Stupid bitch' ?? Completely unacceptable.

I'm glad your H finally said something. However I agree with Leeds - he's done it to stop you telling MIL. And he may well tell DS that on the quiet. I would tell her anyway and agree a suspension of driving lessons. Watch your H over the coming days and see how much he is really onside. Hopefully the penny's dropped. Time will tell.

As you are well aware OP the issues run much deeper than these Easter Eggs.

My god I would never speak to my mum like that and I’m a grown adult with my own family!