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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Instamums 5

999 replies

Supernorthernme · 01/04/2018 00:04

The thread continues....if it hasn't continued elsewhere! @Lateforall it was me who questioned Lobella loves depression wears lippy campaign. I get that the idea is that being a bit glam might be a way of coping. And i have been guilty of putting my face on to carry on in the world. I get that not everyone with pnd is sat at home in pjs unshowered with greasy hair. But I just find the whole thing so false on her account - maybe that is because I know of her in real life.

But I think so many of them have massivley over exaggerated aspects of their lives because it sells. Whether that is FODs clumsy parenting or whatever. But it really doesnt sit well

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Mumofkids · 03/04/2018 16:37

@cady that's the whole point, of course she didn't say they were gifts. You haven't been following her have you? You just quite literally have no idea.

TheChocolateTeapot · 03/04/2018 16:39

But Cady, that doesn't release some people from the social pressure to confòrm - if the grammer has it, so must I. Without that acknowledged link there would be no financial gain. .... and therein lies my issue with it.

CadyHeron · 03/04/2018 16:39

The grammers are my friend - what they have, I must have.......

Take that offline though and apply as if speaking about your real life friends. Actual friends.
Friend Jane has all the latest gadgets. You don't. As you don't have the same spending power. Should Jane stop her spending habits just because her friend has less and feels an overwhelming urge to keep up?
It's not Jane's fault. You need to be looking at yourself and stop feeling like you need to keep up all the time as you really don't need to.

TheChocolateTeapot · 03/04/2018 16:44

..... and I am happy to discuss this with you @Cady - on the internet, just as in real life, some of the most interesting people are the people we have least in common with. (Which might explain why I would never make it as a grammer! The idea of not being able to have a conversation, just a procession of ❤❤❤ leaves me cold!)

CadyHeron · 03/04/2018 16:45

that's the whole point, of course she didn't say they were gifts. You haven't been following her have you? You just quite literally have no idea.

People seem to be fixating on one single account. I'm not talking about her.
I was addressing the point people keep bringing up like "why doesn't she just feckin buy it herself" type answers, and #greedy #grabby #tasteless.
People have a problem regardless of whether they are marked as gifts or not, it seems.
In that case there's plenty that don't monetise you could watch instead.

TheChocolateTeapot · 03/04/2018 16:47

You're right but sadly it's just not that easy and we are now witnessing the highest level of anxiety, depression and unhappiness in young people as a result. In real life it is contained - on social media it is magnified. Why do you think social media is so successful if not for this very real truth.

Mumofkids · 03/04/2018 16:47

But that's not the point being made. Do you have kids? This is not about all the people commenting here. There are rules for advertising for very good reason and like another poster said you continually dodge the moral and social issues regarding this.
You also really don't have a clue how sneaky it all was. Not sure your opinion on this, as someone who has never followed her/them is really very relevant.

Mumofkids · 03/04/2018 16:48

Those points you've quoted were in relation to that account so I assumed that's who you were talking anout

Mumofkids · 03/04/2018 16:50

I would say that 90% of my feed is not monetised, and the whole point is, none of these accounts were in a noticeable way 2 years ago. Hence why there is discussion.

PavlovaPrincess · 03/04/2018 16:51

I thought we'd moved past the 'just unfollow, lol' argument (if you can call it an argument) 2 or 3 threads ago 🙄

CadyHeron · 03/04/2018 16:55

Not heard of that programme, chocolateteapot, will have to look it up as it sounds like something I'd be interested in.

Mumofkids · 03/04/2018 16:55

In fact I don't think I've followed anyone else who's ever behaved like that. I thought I was following my an inspirational midwife, didn't realised I'd signed up as one of the queen blaggers sheep and unknowingly contributed.

Shimshiminysheroo · 03/04/2018 17:02

Is cady MOD? Grin

Areyouinthegame · 03/04/2018 17:12

@shim no I think mod hired her. Smile

Stopyourhavering64 · 03/04/2018 17:22

I do wonder if these instamums are actually happy ...it seems so full on having to promote their businesses, interact or not with their fan base
I'd much rather live a simple life where I don't need to compete with what to buy and who the next up and coming instacelebrity is and keep checking up on the competition
I find it fascinating how they have such a massive following when in fact they contribute so little , well certainly, to my life, although Initially I did feel a bit duped by some of them until I saw them for what they were
It's interesting that VERO doesn't seem to have taken off....I wonder why?

PavlovaPrincess · 03/04/2018 17:29

VERO was being promoted left, right and centre on insta at one point.

I don't know how true this is but I heard it was owned by a Russian billionaire and if you installed the app you had to give allow it access to your contacts.

I think that and the fact that it had some bugs has put a lot of people off, plus the fact the big IGers weren't necessarily guaranteed a following on VERO and they couldn't be arsed to start from scratch.

Areyouinthegame · 03/04/2018 17:29

@mumofkids I understand the feeling of being duped. I started following a NHS midwife. I totally admired her message and hard work. But when the money rolled in her persona just became that of a greedy entitled petulant child. How does someone change so quickly? She completely sold her soul, family and privacy. And she sold it so cheap too.

PavlovaPrincess · 03/04/2018 17:32

@Areyouinthegame I completely agree but I think when you have thousands of followers hanging on your every word telling you how amazing you are all the time, it kind of goes to your head.

It does you good to step outside the bubble every so often, but who really wants to hear criticism (however valid) about yourself and the things you do.

HolyMountain · 03/04/2018 17:42

Pavlova i agree wholeheartedly regarding the adoration bestowed on these women by the fan girls.

There was a comment on Mod's last square from a women telling her You are an inspiration of how I want to be a mother.

Hmm I didn't get the impression she actually knows MoD in real life.

puppower · 03/04/2018 17:56

Is the whole “I need a dishwasher” or “some new holiday clothes” just blagging? I assumed the bloggers had already agreed in advance to the free dishwasher or clothes & it was a way of weaving the product placement into stories & making it look like the advert happened organically.

PavlovaPrincess · 03/04/2018 18:06

@HolyMountain it's bizarre, innit?! They really are a whole new breed of 'celeb'.

@puppower it's a definite blag. We think DLAM tried it for a car seat not so long since.

miamimice · 03/04/2018 18:11

I think its probably a bit of both. I do find the 'I need recommendations for' posts a bit odd. I have taken time to comment on them before and tbh I felt a little stab of disappointment when my comment was ignored so I haven't bothered again (unless I really like the blogger). Some bloggers are good at engaging though. Kat asked for coffee machine recommendations and she responded to or liked loads of comments (am yet to see whether it resulted in a new coffee machine or not). I think it appears very rude when they ask for recommendations and then don't even acknowledge the responses. If you have too many responses to be able to respond, then Instagram probably isn't the right platform for asking for a recommendation. The cynic in me now thinks some of them ask questions just to get their engagement rates up as well.

I did see a white goods shop reply on a blogger white goods recommendation post 'we can help you with that' and my first thought was, oh that's handy. My second thought was, why on earth is a white goods shop following that blogger? It made me think it was a bit staged.

Booie09 · 03/04/2018 18:16

Hate that word "brand" what is mod brand anyway?

CadyHeron · 03/04/2018 18:19

Brands often follow influencers, it's not necessarily staged.

PavlovaPrincess · 03/04/2018 18:22

I think it appears very rude when they ask for recommendations and then don't even acknowledge the responses

I agree. Although on the washing machine post, MOD had hundreds of comments so I wouldn't really expect her to reply to all of them, but if it was me, I would acknowledged it in my next post.

Probably something like, 'Thanks for all the recommendations on my last post, I couldn't reply to them all but I'll be taking everything on board.' Just looks rude otherwise and would put me off ever commenting on her posts again.

Just throw the plebs (I include myself in that) a few crumbs Confused