To think that’s it’s cheeky as fuck to expect other people to fund your skin removal surgery?

[Lactofreechummy]

My friend had gastric bypass surgery last year after really struggling with her weight since childhood.

She has done amazingly well and lost over 11 stones.

Yesterday, I had a notification pop up on facebook.

My friend has set up a page where people can donate money to help fund her skin removal surgery. The target is set at £6,500.

As someone who has also lost a considerable amount of weight (5.5 stones) and also has some extra skin etc, I find it ludicrous to even think of asking for other’s to fund it. I have told my friend this and she said that she couldn’t think of any other way to raise funds quickly enough.

Also OP I really think you come off badly here. It's not enough for you that you don't have to donate - you don't want her to seek the money at all. As far as you're concerned she should suffer through the discomfort and embarrassment of loose skin because asking for help is SO cheeky and wrong. That attitude is really unpleasant IMO.

@kimanda that's really awful, the poor woman. I might donate to her crowdfunder so that some good at least comes from this thread!

Yeah @catspaws I feel sorry for her too, and think the OP is really mean. The lady in question has done so well to lose all the weight, but skin removal is rarely covered on the NHS, so she probably has no choice other than to ask via crowdfunding. Nothing wrong with it IMO.

If people are happy to donate that's up to them, if you're not then don't.

I don't see what the problem is. She wants money, they know what she wants it for, the people who donate are free to do so if they wish. No one is being forced

most crowd funding is not cheeky. lots of people contributing a small amount makes a huge difference. i have dona
ted to several. i wish her all the luck in the world.

There are worse examples of crowd funding than this (e.g.my teenager wants to walk the Great Wall of China - give us some cash)
I would imagine if you have lost a lot of weight (by whatever method - gastric band is not necessarily an 'easy' route, it is not a miracle cure - you still have to put a lot of effort in) then it must be pretty depressing to be left with a lot of excess skin.

Saying it shouldn't be available on the NHS is like saying you should be punished for trying to get healthy and lose weight - when in fact people who try to change thier lives in this way should be supported IMO.

And people 'get fat' for a variety of reasons - sometimes because of awful things happening to them, sometimes because of illness, sometimes because they were over fed by thier parents and have always been overweight, etc etc.

Maybe we should show a little more compassion to people who are trying to improve thier lives (and ultimately cost the NHS a lot less because they won't have the problems that being overweight brings)

That's how the NHS works surely - everyone pays into it, but not everyone takes out - some people will need to use it more than others, and hopefully it balances out, The fact that it doesn't balance out it not because of people having treatment they 'don't deserve' it is because it is underfunded from the top.

You choose whether you want to fund someone or not - there isn't a gun to your head.

It's cheeky asking friends. Do I think the NHS should fund this. Not sure. They fund a lot less deserving cases IMHO.

If she had lost weight properly whilst exercising and eating right she wouldn't have a load of loose skin.

This is such bollocks. If skin elasticity is poor (most commonly age-related) then loose skin will be left after weightloss whatever the method used. By the time people get to the point where surgery is contemplated, they are obviously likely to have tried everything else first, i.e. will by definition be older, but there's nothing to say that that is how this particular person lost their excess weight. If you must be hateful, Moon, at least be informed.

I'm not even going to waste my time addressing the bullshit idea that anyone can lose weight through diet and exercise if they want to/can be bothered.

I hate the begging which seems to be acceptable nowadays . She could get a loan , it's her fault she got fat and the nhs has given her life saving surgery . She should find the rest! ...
I have struggled with my weight all my life and go to the gym and work hard to not be too tired overweight . I'd be embarrassed to ask for people's money !!

I have struggled with my weight all my life and go to the gym and work hard to not be too tired overweight . I'd be embarrassed to ask for people's money !!

Bully for you @sportyfool

Or should I call you Smuggyfool?

I think I might be the person @helenadove mentioned upthread.

I've lost in excess of 20 stones and am now carrying approximately 3.5 stone of excess skin.

I get frequent infections and they smell awful no matter how much I wash. If I move wrong then parts of my skin will split.

I rarely leave the house, my confidence is at rock bottom, worse than when I was fat. I can't work cos confidence and the god awful smell when infections are bad.

I've been quoted £28-30k for reconstructive surgery - nhs criteria is a bmi of 28 maintained for two years. I'm a shortarse so no way can I achieve that cos.. extra skin.

I've thought about crowdfunding, but having seen how nasty some of you have been.. no chance. If I got the skin off I'd be healthier and able to work and contribute to society. As it stands now I'm more of a burden than I was before.

The NHS should fund it. Other "lifestyle illnesses" (things that can be caused by a person's lifestyle, actions or inactions, like cancer, heart disease, AIDS and suchlike) get treated on the NHS, why should the recovery from obesity be any different?

What's the problem? It's crowdfunding. People can donate or not as they choose. Weight gain isn't as simple as 'she got fat' - there are all sorts of issues here, and loose skin isn't just unsightly, it can cause all sorts of health problems. If she can get crowdfunding for it, then good luck.

Why bully for me ? I'm not the one scrounging ffs . I was brought up to work hard for what i want or need . I've been overweight and sorted it out myself . I have some loose skin from pregnancies but wouldn't dream of asking anyone else to fix it .
I find the culture of asking for stuff quite disgusting and I'm allowed my opinion .

Genuinely can’t say I’d have an issue with this- probably not in a position to contribute at the moment as I’m trying to fund alterations to my house as it is due to my disabilities- only so much the council will do and when they’ll do it, who knows 🤷‍♀️

I think I’d make positive noises, encourage her to wait the two years and maybe exchange favours for donations for the pot? X amount gets you babysitting for a night, X amount and I’ll cook you and your family the dish I’m best at doing... I don’t know, throwing things out there. I would definitely (selfishly maybe!) be more inclined to donate more if she’s willing to put herself out for it. And I could always use a babysitter!

I don't blame her at all for wanting to have the operation - although I understand that there should be a period of weight stability first, which is often harder to maintain than the downward trajectory. If it's not possible on the NHS then it is pointless people saying that well it should be be, therefore she's shouldn't even try to raise the funds.

Good luck to her.

I don't understand these threads, if you don't want to help out your friend, just .. don't. You sound jealous that she might get financial help and you didn't dare asking.

In an ideal world, of course, it should be done on the NHS< but realistically, life saving drugs and human patient care should come first, and they are not even available. So no, no NHS cosmetic surgery.

However, nothing wrong with cosmetic surgery in itself, nothing wrong in asking. People who are so outraged just sound jealous that someone else might get something. Just ignore, ask for yourself, or be a friend, it's not that hard

I also don't see the problem with crowdfunding. Nobody's forced to contribute!

I think the NHS should fund the surgery, though, and I work for the NHS (and pay tax). Saying that it shouldn't because it doesn't fund this or that for other conditions that can't be helped is neither here nor there really - if the patient stays fat, the NHS will fund treatment for their diabetes, heart disease, cancer. If they go through all the effort and struggle to lose the weight and end up with problematic loose skin, the NHS will fund treatment for constant infections, nurse checks and dressings (daily or more in some cases) when the skin breaks down completely, counselling and medication for any resulting mental health problems... unless the patient gives up and gets fat again, in which case, see above. A few grand for the surgery which would solve the skin problems and also motivate a lot of people to lose weight and then keep it off would pay for itself over and over again.

@ShatnersWig if it's only 6 quid a year can't you pay for it yourself?

It actually is very very hard to get weight loss surgery on the NHS. Its a huge process to go through and many appointments. You do not just get surgery after one appointment. Im going through this myself and been on courses seen consultants dietitians psychologists. Then and only then you will get to tier 4 which is info sessions and meeting the surgeon. Its taken me two years to get that far and been hard going but ive done the criteria and having surgery this year. But i dont think the excess skin removal should be done on the nhs.

She's asking, not demanding. Gawd, if it's okay for teens to fundraise for bloody gap years, how can it be objectionable for someone to raise money for surgery? Surgery that will restore their quality of life?

Speaking for myself, I'm going to google off the back of this thread and fricking well donate to her.

What happened to all the money she saved on chocolate

Sally. 💐. While there are some nasty fuckers on this thread & in real life, there are a lot of lovely people who would willingly help. You should crowd fund.

Saying that, you shouldn’t have to. It should be done by the NHS because they should have the sense to see you are maintaining a good weight. It’s ridiculous to include the weight of the excess skin. Have you gone as far up the chain as you possibly can? Have you had legal advice?

The NHS should fund it, the difficulties that not having the op are causing are significant. The NHS funds breast reduction, care for alcoholics, smokers, IVF, various other skin complaints & issues.

Joking aside. I definately don't think the NHS should pay as there is much more serious afflictions that the money needs used for. As for the crowdfunding-why not? No one is obliged to give to crowd funding and if they do then good for her.