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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Now that the chips are down, who is it that I need to call?

112 replies

Sullabylullaby · 17/03/2018 10:06

I live in a small block of flats. A woman and her daughter (approx. 3) live there and sometimes a man lives there too - I'm not sure if he is there all the time as I rarely see him, but have been hearing him more often recently.

For months now, I can hear the woman roaring at the little girl and the girl sobbing hysterically. It's absolutely sickening to listen to and breaks my heart. Right now, the little pet is sobbing hysterically (has been for the past 10 minutes with the woman shouting at her) and my stomach is in absolute knots. I actually feel nauseous hearing it.

I don't know whether she hits the little child as I can't hear that, but I am guessing yes, as sometimes the child's crying gets all the more urgent so to speak, as if she has been hit.

Anyway - now to the question (posting here for traffic, sorry it's not aibu?)

Who exactly do I call to report this woman? There is an ad on radio at the moment saying to report to the council, but what department do I call? Does anyone know what department? I would have thought it should be SS but I don't even know how to do that. Can you please direct me to the appropriate authority? I can't let this gorgeous little beautiful tiny thing suffer any longer. It's just galling, gut-wrenching and sickening to hear her little sobs.

OP posts:
Original poster
Sullabylullaby · 17/03/2018 10:07

I'm in London Borough of Waltham Forest if that's any help?

OP posts:
Queenofthestress · 17/03/2018 10:08

You should have a sign posting page on your council website for FFAP who are the ones that will tell you who you need to call.

InspMorse · 17/03/2018 10:08

Phone the police. 999. Tell them.

Original poster
Sullabylullaby · 17/03/2018 10:09

Thanks - will have a look.

OP posts:
Mamimawr · 17/03/2018 10:09

Phone your local council and ask for social services, or phone the NSPCC to ask for advice. I would also start making a note of how often you hear shouting etc.

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 17/03/2018 10:09

I’d phone the Police I think

Queenofthestress · 17/03/2018 10:09

It's a little awkward to find on their website but here it is - directory.walthamforest.gov.uk/kb5/walthamforest/directory/advice.page?id=27fyEuq_Qzo

WreckTangled · 17/03/2018 10:10

You could try MASH they'll be able to advise or your local health visitors.

Now that the chips are down, who is it that I need to call?
Queenofthestress · 17/03/2018 10:10

In all honestly though if it's happening right now,I would actually phone the police.

Original poster
Sullabylullaby · 17/03/2018 10:11

I'm not sure that it's a police matter. Genuinely. The couple were shouting and arguing until past 2am last night, but I didn't hear the little girl, so I presume she slept through it.

OP posts:
falsepriest · 17/03/2018 10:11

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

PrettyLittIeThing · 17/03/2018 10:13

Calling the police because a parent is shouting at a child and they are crying? Wow this world is mad.

InspMorse · 17/03/2018 10:13

OP. If it's happening right now it's not inappropriate to call the police.

false You're a f

Queenofthestress · 17/03/2018 10:13

Best advice I can give is call social services now, and if you hear the little girl sounding like she's been hit report it to the police, social will more than likely tell you to do that

Original poster
Sullabylullaby · 17/03/2018 10:14

Queenofthestress thanks I'll call that number on Monday morning. I don't feel it's urgent enough to warrant a police response. I'd prefer a more long term intervention. Even if she's not hitting the girl, she needs intensive parenting classes. She's going to bloomin' know it's me too I'd say.

OP posts:
Original poster
Sullabylullaby · 17/03/2018 10:15

They're open from Monday at 9am. Otherwise it's police. I'll just call on Monday. Thanks all.

OP posts:
Flutterbyeee · 17/03/2018 10:16

"I can't hear if she is hitting the girl but I am guessing yes." Please do not waste the authorities time by making a report based on guesses.

Queenofthestress · 17/03/2018 10:16

I wouldn't hesitate in a heartbeat to report to social services if it warrants it, I have done before, always best to report then not report and something happen

InspMorse · 17/03/2018 10:16

I don't feel it's urgent enough to warrant a police response
Only you can judge because we can't hear what's going on. From your OP it sounded urgent.

PurpleDaisies · 17/03/2018 10:17

How would they know it was you who called?

The nspcc has helpline that will give you advice on what to do next.

VioletCharlotte · 17/03/2018 10:17

Sorry, but if you're really concerned I don't get why you'd post on Mumsnet? Surely it's pretty obvious to anyone you should speak to social service. A quick google search would give you their number.

Confusedbeetle · 17/03/2018 10:19

You need to phone Social Services and ask to speak to the Childrens' duty social worker. If the problem continues you may have to report is several times so they know it is not a one off row

Original poster
Sullabylullaby · 17/03/2018 10:20

VioletCharlotte - the answer is in my OP.

For simplicity I'll copy and paste Who exactly do I call to report this woman? There is an ad on radio at the moment saying to report to the council, but what department do I call? Does anyone know what department? I would have thought it should be SS but I don't even know how to do that. Can you please direct me to the appropriate authority?

OP posts:
PrettyLittIeThing · 17/03/2018 10:22

If you didn't know how to do it then why didn't you google it? Anyway I think it's ott to report someone to ss for shouting at their kid and a kid crying. Mumsnet is a crazy place sometimes. Ss will not do anything about this.