Now that the chips are down, who is it that I need to call?

[Sullabylullaby]

I live in a small block of flats. A woman and her daughter (approx. 3) live there and sometimes a man lives there too - I'm not sure if he is there all the time as I rarely see him, but have been hearing him more often recently.

For months now, I can hear the woman roaring at the little girl and the girl sobbing hysterically. It's absolutely sickening to listen to and breaks my heart. Right now, the little pet is sobbing hysterically (has been for the past 10 minutes with the woman shouting at her) and my stomach is in absolute knots. I actually feel nauseous hearing it.

I don't know whether she hits the little child as I can't hear that, but I am guessing yes, as sometimes the child's crying gets all the more urgent so to speak, as if she has been hit.

Anyway - now to the question (posting here for traffic, sorry it's not aibu?)

Who exactly do I call to report this woman? There is an ad on radio at the moment saying to report to the council, but what department do I call? Does anyone know what department? I would have thought it should be SS but I don't even know how to do that. Can you please direct me to the appropriate authority? I can't let this gorgeous little beautiful tiny thing suffer any longer. It's just galling, gut-wrenching and sickening to hear her little sobs.

For future reference if you could hear the shouting in the middle of the night then the child would have too. The poor thing must have been in bed scared to move

I absolutely hate doing this for personal reasons. But maybe the little girl's life might be more pleasant for her in the future. I really hope I have done the right thing. If it's stressful for me hearing it, I'm trying to remind myself that it must be infinitely worse experiencing it.

Definitely the MASH for your area, you can get their number from any local school website usually if you read their safeguarding policy!

MASH stands for multi agency safeguarding hub, it’s the one stop shop if anyone had a concern and they decide who best to pass the referral on to if it meets the criteria for something to be done.

Sounds like Early Help might be the course of action offered here, rather than a full social services intervention.

Let's not forget that abuse doesn't have to be physical. It can be mental and verbal, or pure neglect.

Nobody wants to raise the alarm on innocent parents, but wherever there is cause for concern, you must ALWAYS err on the side of safety of the child. 'Better safe than sorry' is the best mantra.

It's a shame that social services can sometimes make a pigs ear of things, as indeed can any element of child protection, but that should not be a prevent someone who has genuine concerns from voicing them.

Sometimes parents just a little extra help, and you calling might trigger that help. It's not all about dramatic protection procedures and parents losing their children. Social services really do not want to take children away. They just want them to be safe.

I genuinely think a parenting course might help this family out. The little girl is stunningly beautiful. You would actually stop to admire her. It's very difficult to hear what is her 'real' life. She is well turned out, lovely clothes and her hair always done perfectly. I just feel so shit having done this, but there is no way I could have continued hearing what I listen to daily. Which I must reiterate is not just a child having a tantrum. It's a mother shouting and roaring for 10 minutes at a time at a sobbing little girl. I am hoping that she doesn't hit the little one, but if she has been, then I pray that it stops with today's intervention.

Well done, not easy to do but could be the intervention the family need.

Why don't you ring 101 and let them figure it out?

Better to be safe than sorry.

Well done OP for phoning, you've done the right thing.

I think you've done the right thing. If the mother is struggling, it might get her some help from social work getting involved. This seems far beyond a case of just a toddler crying because it's what kids do.

I remember when I was younger, we lived above a woman who used to scream at her baby. She would be screaming 'SHUT UP, SHUT UP' over and over again while it cried. I still think of that sometimes and feel sorry for her. She must have been having such a tough time. She moved soon after, and I hope life got better for her and the baby.

Adopter here.
I think you have done the right thing.

Well done OP.