AIBU to think some people should just grow up

[ithinksheisawuss]

Details changed and I’ve name changed to stop it being identifiable.

AIBU to think some people just need to grow up and get on with it at work?

I work in a busy fast paced environment. It’s a big office with two distinct areas. On one side are the sales people this is high stress and loud, on the other side is the support staff area which is much gentler. The support staff are mainly older women, the sales staff are a mixed bunch.

The sales side is very robust, lots of swearing and mickey taking. Some days people let off steam by shouting we all just laugh and get on with it, no one takes offence. When someone shouts we laugh at them then they laugh and the tension breaks. We need this release sometimes.

Anyway, one of the support ladies lady S was doing a job at the sales end of the office colleague A put the phone down and started to shout. Lady S asked a question of colleague A and colleague A shouted. She didn’t shout at lady S - she was just shouty iyswim.

Lady S has put in a formal complaint saying she has been bullied and colleague A was unprofessional. Colleague A often behaves like this it’s her passion that makes her good at her job.

If all the sales staff behaved in the quiet demure way the support staff do no sales would get made! But the whole support area is up in arms about poor lady S.

TBH I think lady S is a bit of a wuss but I am wondering if I am too harsh. Colleague A is really valuable to the business, lady S is easily replaceable.

“We know the rules they don't.
I thought she should get it because she can hear it in the background but obviously not.”

Utter Cringe

The sales staff need to grow up. It's common for people to be rude and act like dicks and laugh it off as 'banter.'

This is why 'sales people' get a bad name, shouting and acting like knobs in the workplace. I feel sorry for the support staff, I bet they're all sick of it and lady S is trying to stand up fur herself and the whole support team.

Your comment about her being 'easily replaceable' is very telling. That's really not a very nice attitude to have.

You all sound like you need to de stress with a harmless bit of dwarf tossing

^spat my tea out laughing at this

Do you actually mean that people are shouting at each other? Or just that they are raising their voices? Shouting implies either that they are really bellowing as though talking to someone far away, or angry. If somebody actually shouted at me at work, I'd be shocked. If they just raised their voice because they were hyped up, I'd roll my eyes but not take it personally.

Also were the words polite, or swearing but not directed at the support lady, or swearing/ rude at the support lady?

Sounds a really unpleasant environment with really unpleasant people but even so, why the need to shout all the time? And why the need to be 'careful' in future around the support staff? What an odd thing to say. Just basic respect for other people would suffice.

God ye sound like the worse type of people.

In my profession, shouting at support staff makes you an arrogant arsehole, not some kind of brilliant wunderkind.

No wonder those working in sales have such a bad reputation.

I think lady S is on MN which is why I am being careful.

You sure know how to be tactful, right enough.

I used to work in criminal justice and for eight years the environment was jocular and not quiet. When I loved to another area the quietness really hot to me at first. I'm used to open plan offices and a lively environment. However your team sound like absolute tossers and you have by no means accepted you're unreasonable : the way you speak about the support staff is utterly disrespectful.

You’re not listening because your response is to ‘keep it down when the sales team are kver’, which misses the point.

You should be aiming for ‘banter within the bounds of professionalism’.

Also, you don’t have to be ‘besties’ with everyone in order to work well together. Just respect them and keep the basics of courtesy/politeness.
We all work with a range of people, we are not necessarily going to be best friends with all, but that doesn’t mean we can’t work as a team!

And seriously consider your attitude to the support staff- you couldnt do yiur job without them (bunch of shouty people trying to invoice on time and do the filing? Haha not).

PS tricycletops Wins the thread for me
selling hot tubs from Ebbw Vale

no one belittled or shouted AT S, she was just near when some shouting happened eg " the fucking thing is broken".

Sounds like S had just asked a civil question and A ignored her in favour of doing some pointless shouting.
You are right, A should grow up.

It's all "top bantz" until Person A resigns with a list of incidents, collated over time. Person A takes the company to EAT. Company can not defend the claim. Ends up paying out around 2 times the amount than Person B made in one year of profit in a out of court settlement.

Fun time explaining the above to the MD in conjunction with legal team. A unique case but why the banter police exists in many companies.

I work with the premise of what would this look like in a EAT, written on paper with no context of the situation.

EduCated (SHOUTING LOUDLY)I just spat my tea out at that!

Can you not just use your inside voices?

You do nothing to convince me that sales people aren't the arseholes I always suspected they might be.

OP: WELL THIS FUCKING THREAD FUCKING BACKFIRED ON ME. FUCKING HELL.

COLLEAGUE: HA HA HA

OP: HA HA HA

THE END

If I can deal with 30 5 year olds without shouting, pretty sure someone working in sales can contain their shoutiness too.

It all sounds very alpha show-off bs to me.

How bizarre. The only area I’ve seen shouting/swearing being ‘the norm’ is the manual labour sector!

Agree that ppl should not shout at colleagues. No excuses for it. Other posters have commented on this a lot so won't repeat.

I would throw in that maybe the personality traits to sell and to support are different? But does that matter? It's just an accident waiting to happen tbh.

Harassment is defined as (something like) 'as is perceived by the victim, and not necessarily ad intended'.

So if your colleague was upset by the shoutyness, she has every right to be, and every right to raise a complaint. Good on her for doing it. She was probably the only one to have the balls to stand up to it, rather than be the only one offended by it.

How do you work accurately and with attention to detail in such a shouty environment?

Also, how can your other colleagues concentrate on their work with all the background noise?

You mentioned that you could tone it down but implied that people would fail their targets and lose their jobs. Surely, that would happen if people weren't doing their jobs accurately. That would happen because you lot don't shut up to let people get on with their jobs.

We can 'behave' and if profit falls then people will loose their jobs and it sure as shit won't be colleague A who goes. Lady A will be looking for job.

Well actually sales lady could be looking for a job too because suddenly the company might find they have too many highly paid sales personnel. Don't get complacent and think nobody is irreplaceable.

I am not sure what industry you are in, but this culture you are describing is pretty antiquated and really dying out in most places. The whole 'front office' 'back office' divide..

A loud mouth is a loud mouth, whether in sales or not and these types tend to think they are hilarious and the life and soul of the office but a lot of eye rolling generally goes on behind their backs..

Nothing wrong with a bit of banter but if people are actively complaining about you personally (I am assuming you are colleague A here) then its time to wise up.

i would put money on this NOT being a trading floor or City environment. That culture does not exist really anymore in that context.

In my experience a lot of Sales tend to be viewed as a bit dim - certainly not the sharpest minds in the organisation. They don't design the product, they don't make the product and often don't really understand the product and would be clueless in any after sales capacity.. They are usually good networkers and very pushy.

This is not all sales people - the best ones however, in my experience, don't tend to be the braying big mouths in the office.

Are you Gareth Cheeseman?