To be annoyed at the exclusion of single parents

[Peachyfizz]

There was a bit up roar about the brewers fayre not including single mums in their Sunday mother's day deal.

Just seen a local place of ours saying mums go free with another full paying person. My parents are away and obviously friends are with their families. So just me and DS this mothering Sunday. So I have to pay full price as I normally would. Just feel sad that us single mums are made to feel excluded! It would be nice to have a treat! AIBU?

gingham thanks it's good to know it gets easier. It's already easier from when he was a baby.

Yanbu. Being single is more expensive than being in a couple anyway. Rent is the same even though there's one wage. Council tax is only 25% reduced. Utility bills aren't that much more for 2 extra people.

I still wouldn't swap it though

As in, wouldn't swap living on my own. I don't know how well I'd tolerate living with a partner now!

Um...I’m a single parent, I really don’t care about this sort of thing.

I hate the way Mother's day jhas become like another valentine's day. An opportunity for happily married women to boast about how loved and how blessed they are on facebook. There's no answer to that I know.

Gingerbread are just kicking off to kick off.

This needs to go on The List alongside "you are just looking to be offended".

"Being single is more expensive than being in a couple anyway. Rent is the same even though there's one wage. Council tax is only 25% reduced. Utility bills aren't that much more for 2 extra people. "

Yes, but this is the same for all single people, not just parents and, again, it's not BF's fault or something for them to make up for.

Gingerbread are just kicking off to kick off

Hilarious. They are carefully and diligently working to expand working opportunities for single parents and ensure that children in single parent families don't miss out. Such rabble rousers

Gwenhwyfar yes I know that's why I said being single not being a single parent. Was just making conversation as I'm bored!

Fwiw I think x for any mom there with her child is farer and less contentious.

However it isn't the parks responsibility to worry about OP's mental or emotional wellbeing. The year my sister was in her own with the kids we had a family lunch, I bought them presents and cards to give her, she celebrated it. That was our responsibility as her loved ones.

Perhaps OP needs to be more honest in rl about how she is feeling or her family /friends need to be more supportive

Yabu. Ideally they would offer 50% off to all mums, but hardly worth being bothered about.

There are loads of areas single parents get a shit deal. Eg pre universal credit a two parent family can have a state funded sahp until dc leave education, a lone parent can't. A lone parent starts losing child benefit at 50k, but a couple can both earn 49k and still be entitled, or even if one earns 60k and the other is a sahp they have the option to have two incomes.

We're portrayed like shit in the media. Not just the mail, but even general media always sticks to certain stereotypes, and not representative of most lps. The stupid assumptions and judgements from wankers.

Plus all the things like council tax, holidays etc that are the same for any single person.

But this just isn't something that bothers me.

The simple fact is that most celebrations make a lot of people feel shit

Christmas gets the gold medal
But easter and mother’s day can also be painful
Bank holidays can be shitty too

And it’s a little thing like a TV ad or an offer like this that throw people

It’s very normal and very human

Ok maybe IBU but I can't help the way it makes me feel. It's just tough

Not BU to find it hard . You are not alone
I hate xmas to the extent my mum
Told me off as I would upset my kids !

For every ‘festival’ there are myriad people finding it hard

Peachyfizz - I'm sorry you're finding it hard and I hope things get better for you soon. I do think it's better to face your emotions and try to work through them.

Thanks 🍷

I do think that some companies can be short sighted with their offers.

A number of years ago I went on holidays with some friends. She has a husband and two children, I'm a single mother with one child. We both booked our accommodation separately, and when we talked later, I found out she had paid less than me, because she got a deal for two adults and two children, and I had to pay full price.

A child free with a paying adult would be a better deal all around for people.

but generally speaking a 2 parent family has normally 2 incomes and therefore has more of a benefit. I'm a 1 parent family. 1 Income and I still have to pay. It isn't fair!!

Not always the case though - you get lots of posters on here mentioning how they can't afford to move in with their partner as they will end up losing money. You also get it in the Higher Ed threads (and used to get it when some 6th formers could get maintenance grants), how many older dc get the benefits because the parents live apart, but wouldn't if they lived together.

You feel very isolated at those places at a weekend when everyone’s in little groups and you’re juggling a tray and food for three people and a pushchair
You do realise that many, many, many of us take our dc out on our own, for 101 reasons, don't you ?

The hogfather has it though. There are lots of difficulties about bringing up your ds on your own, but not being able to get a BOGOF offer at an adventure park when you aren't even taking the 'one' to be free or to pay, and your ds is too little to understand the concept of going there or not even knowing about it, isn't the thing to be worrying about. As others have said, there are all sorts of deals you can get at different times of your life from companies trying to win your business, none of them will ever apply to everyone as that takes away the 'attraction' of going to that place on that day, but it isn't discrimination for the companies to offer them.

No matter what policy an organisation or government comes up with, no matter how popular, there will always be people for whom it doesn’t work. Doesn’t mean it’s discrimination though

Not read the full thread but am confused. You are not losing out on anything. If you were a two parent family you would go to this park and pay for one adult, you would go free and you would pay for the child. So as a family you would pay for an adult and a child. As a single parent therefore you are paying exactly the same as the two parent families. So you are not missing out on any saving. I'm a single parent and can see no problem with this.

My OP is stating I was upset about feeling excluded it weren't really about the money value

Fantastic news OP, I've checked and they're not banning single adults with children.

imnottoofussed
No, you are not paying the same. A two parent family are paying for half an adult each. A single adult paying for a whole adult, so double.

What about free child spaces on holidays! That's excluding people who don't have children! Some people can't have children! They should give the same discount to all couples whether they've kids or not.

It’s a private company and they charge what they like and offer promotions as they see fit.

It’s not discriminatory. Society these days...bloody hell.

They’re not excluding you, you are perfectly able to go and eat there.

Why on earth would you expect they would just give you your meal for free? That’s just ridiculous.

And since you’ve since claimed it’s not about the money, the good news is that you’re not being excluded and can still go there. Yay for you!