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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Mumsnet Vs Real life.

999 replies

KungFuPandaWorksOut16 · 06/03/2018 11:44

Inspired by a comment on an active thread at the moment. The comment was along the lines of
"Only on mumsnet would you be advised this"

I've also seen it on a few threads where posters point out that only mumsnet would you be given this advice and never in real life.

So what advice/tips do you see mentioned on Mumsnet that you just don't think would be said in real life.

I'll start!
You can guarantee a poster will give the advice that OP needs to pack his bags and kick him out, on something really minor. They don't suggest being an adult and have a conversation first, it's straight away pack his bags and show him the door.

What other Mumsnet pearls of wisdom do we have?

OP posts:
Original poster
KungFuPandaWorksOut16 · 07/03/2018 18:03

Oh I've got another One!

On here it isn't good form to name call the OW, all your hurt and anger should only be directed at the person who made the vows.

In RL I can't imagine in your anger of discovering an affair you'd refrain from name calling or acting out.

OP posts:
londonista · 07/03/2018 18:06

Haven't RTFT, but a classic MN piece of advice is to get a solicitor involved in response to someone posting about something minor a neighbour's done to annoy them.

Yeah you could do that. Or you could just go over and have a chat.

Aridane · 07/03/2018 18:07

Ooh, I have one not yet mentioned. On a long haul flight you would be totally unreasonable and selfish to recline your seat after meal service.

ravenmum · 07/03/2018 18:07

I couldn't give a shit about the OW KungFu, in real life or anywhere. My ex was looking for a woman and found one. Could have been anyone. Now she's wasted years of her life on a man she thought would give her a child (he lied to her about that). I think my ex is a bastard, and in some ways she is also a victim.

Eltonjohnssyrup · 07/03/2018 18:09

Ooh. Londonista, and that all legal problems can be solved by going for half an hours free advice.

JustDanceAddict · 07/03/2018 18:09

They do talk about Russell Group IRL tbh!!

londonista · 07/03/2018 18:10

ShinyCat
I'm one who personally found that their fertility hadn't declined after 35.
Am I deluded?

looks down in confusion at the 2 children I managed to have in my late 30s early 40s both on the first attempt

Not saying others won't struggle. I didn't though.

Aridane · 07/03/2018 18:11

My favourites are the faux legalese emails posters draft for the OP to send in relation to some minor annoyance (totally over the top and Donald Trump or North Korean Kim would Blanche at the extremism of the language). Said posters then demanding to know whether their draft missive has been sent and, if not, why not

londonista · 07/03/2018 18:11

Aridane - YES!
I personally always choose to sit bolt upright for 13 hours so as not to inconvenience the person behind me, who's fast asleep, naturally.

VelvetKiss · 07/03/2018 18:11

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Aridane · 07/03/2018 18:13

Only posters’ DPs cheat, never an OP themselves. An OP is never the other woman

Bluelady · 07/03/2018 18:14

OP My mum's coming to help me out and look after my child when I have my baby.

MN Why on earth do you need help after you've given birth? You've got your (useless inept) DH to look after you all.

Lemonnaise · 07/03/2018 18:15

Only on Mumsnet should separated/divorced men be paying for all their childrens outgoings - mum shouldn't have to pay half, nope it's all up to the father. There was a thread a few months back where a man was paying for everything for his son on top of a large maintenance payment every month he dared to mention to his ex that maybe she could pay for an activity...well you can imagine the answers he got.

HoHoHoHo · 07/03/2018 18:16

If someone has a cigarette two hours before entering your house your house will stink of smoke for months afterwards and you'll have to change the carpets and curtains.

ravenmum · 07/03/2018 18:17

According to the BBC, the "over-35 cliff edge" statistic is based on data from 18th-century France. www.bbc.com/news/magazine-24128176

Aridane · 07/03/2018 18:17

Yes, londonista - and where people have the temerity to recline a seat, a poster’s DP who is an 8’6” rugby player will forceably prevent this by jamming his knees up against the seat.

OP may encourage / permit child to kick (reclined) seat in front .

SpringHen · 07/03/2018 18:20

If you dont want someone walking mud covered shoes all over your house you are germ phobic

londonista · 07/03/2018 18:20

RavenMum ..... Grin
That's okay then!

I've got another one, if you leave your phone anywhere other than in your handbag and someone's PFB jumps around on the furniture and breaks it, it's your fault for leaving it there in the first place.

londonista · 07/03/2018 18:21

SpringHen - yep! Classic MN.

Enjoying this thread enormously.

OP have you been told to get a grip yet? If not, get a grip GET A RUDDY GRIP.

OpenthePickles · 07/03/2018 18:31

"Are you on glue" is apparently the funniest, wittiest comment to make to an OP who may be slightly over-reacting to a situation or worried about a minor mishap.

NinjagoNinja · 07/03/2018 18:33

I don't know where the BMA drew their data from but I'm pretty sure it wasn't drawn from anecdotes

I get your dig, but research is based on asking questions and nobody asks you during your pregnancy how long it took you to conceive. So I would love to know where the BMA's data comes from. I am aware of the original source of the 35 off a clifff thing - the 18th century!

Belindabauer · 07/03/2018 18:36

Agree with lots of these.
A child who misbehaves must have a disability.
Am obnoxious twat has a mental health illness.
It's fine for people not to park in their garage, on their drive or outside their own home, instead when they park so close to your drive they you can barely get in and out , it's fine. You should do a 4 million point turn , it's fine , you are being unreasonable.
If you are short of money it's fine. You can make your own food and it will last for 30 days. Go through skips and go begging at Greggs, in fact why do you need to spend anything anove £10 on food for an entire week. Grow your own veg and get some chickens then you can get eggs and kill and eat the chickens. Then you can make your children a coat from the chicken feathers and potatoe skins.

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 07/03/2018 18:53

The phrase “Wow. just wow.”

AthenaAshton · 07/03/2018 18:56

A random woman accidentally bumps into you.

MN: I hope you screamed at her and call her a fucking cunt.

MN2: I hope you realise she might have dementia.

RL: You apologise to her for the fact that she bumped into you.

throwcushions · 07/03/2018 18:56

People also post the most ridiculous and unbelievable responses to things. One that tickled me was someone who said that when anyone comments on their children eating food that was too "grown up" for them, they simply turn to said fat person (because of course they are always fat) and say well that's why me and my children aren't obese. Yes, of course you do.

It's similar on parking threads.
OP: someone has parked in my allocated space all week, WWYD?
MN: personally I would smash their windscreen and take a shit in their mouth, but I am a very upfront person