Angry downstairs neighour

[maybebaby88]

So a few years ago I moved into my parters flat which he owns. The guy downstairs seemed nice enough, a guy in his fifties. However, occasionally he would shout through the ceiling to shut up if we were making noise whatever time of day it was. I mostly just ignored it.

A couple of years ago we rescued a dog. We already had one, but the new one has been severely abused and tends to go a bit crazy at certain sounds. This happens a few times a day and she will run up and down the hall for a bit crying. This is when the neighbour started gettinf reallh aggressive, basically shouting 'shut the f* up' all the time. My problem is that he does this in the middle of the day. I have become so stressed out and on edge, I keep them quiet until a reasonable time (10am-ish) and even started but he still yells at the slightest thing. Its awful because its got to the point where I end up snapping at the dogs for playing.

To add to that we have just had a baby, and I'm constantly worried that his crying will invoke the same response. I feel like a prisoner in my own home. He shouted the orher day because one of the dogs was trotting around excited to be going on a walk, but it was 11:30!

We dont have a carpet in the hall, just floorboards at the mo as we have really struggled financially, which I know makes it louder, but he shouts regardless of which room it is.

Sorry for the ridiculously long post. But are we in the wrong? If the dogs were constantly barking and running I would understand, but its a few times a day for a few minutes.

YABU. Get a carpet! you haven't been able to save for a carpet in several years? Pull the other leg!
It's not money you want to spend but you're going to have to if you want to have two dogs in an upstairs flat.

Sorry OP, but living in a downstairs flat where the upstairs has no carpet in certain areas is a nightmare.

I used to live in a flat where the upstairs was floored throughout in laminate. I could hear everything that the couple upstairs did and said. Absolutely EVERYTHING! I heard entire conversations and telephone calls, every sound in the loo, and every sigh and groan from every thrust, all feckin night long (they were young and very fit, obviously!). Due to their nightly activity I would get no sleep and could also hear the sounds / feel the vibrations of the electric fan that they used to cool themselves down after an elongated session. My sense of humour lasted only so long about the nightly shag-fests!
I tried every method to drown out the sounds and they were actually quite considerate generally and not particularly noisy. The only thing that helped was when they laid really thick underlay and carpet, but it would have been very expensive for them to do that.
Do you have any friends or family who are getting rid of a carpet and underlay? Alternatively Gumtree or you local Freestuff Facebook page might have a cheap or free carpet.
Consider rehousing your dog too as apart from the reduced noise level, you will have more money available for a carpet.

Have you ever gone downstairs and listened to see how noisy it is? I think you do need to speak to him and say that you recognise he is disturbed by the noise and can you discuss it. Obviously living in a flat does mean there will be some noise, but there are things you can to to reduce it.

He also has the option of sound proofing his ceiling. I think it’s expensive though and would reduce the ceiling height.

You have two dogs, one of them an excitable rescue, in an upstairs flat with floorboards? You need carpets ASAP, the racket must be unbearable. Sorry, but it's you who's BU.

This. YAVVVU. Havwe you been in your neighbour's flat to hear your dogs running around and barking? I can imagine they sound like elephants...

I’m surprised the rescue centre let you have a dog in a flat and with a baby on the way, tbh. That noise would annoy the hell out of me and I’m a dog sitter, so well used to noisy dogs. Some carpet shops sell off their sample mats very cheaply. You can stick them together to make rugs and mats. It looks surprisingly nice. Or just buy a foam backed cut off (the others can ave loads of loose threads) and cut it to size. You really need to deal with this before the baby comes along. Poor man must be driven demented.

OMD

how big is the flat?

you must be driving him absolutely mad

what's in the rental contract about pets? If I were him I would certainly try to complain to the owner.

oh it's not a rental

in that case if I were him I would be going through the lease very carefully depending on if you are freehold or leasehold......

do the decent thing, get really decent underlay and carpet but honestly, it sounds like you had no consideration getting 2 dogs in what sounds like a small flat anyway.

You can afford 2 dogs and a baby but can't afford cheap carpet in your hall?

You must be a nightmare to live under.

A dog crying and running about over my ceiling would drive me mad TBH! I lived in a flat where the next door neighbor had a dog, the clack clack clack of it running on laminat floor was intolerable esp at night. It also yapped and howled a lot. I complained to the agent and they took it seriously, I think they got rid of the dog or moved as I didn't hear it after that.

You really shouldn't get a dog with behaviourial problems if you can't afford to soundproof your flat. It's not fair on the person under you. He might be trying to work from home or sleeping after a night shift.

A baby is different, people are (and should be) far more tolerant of a baby crying. But when they reach toddler age you need to put carpet down, stop them running and jumping indoors. Easier said than done, I'd be looking into selling and moving to a ground floor flat before then.

I wonder if the OP has got the message yet

I actually don't think there is anything wrong with having two dogs and a baby in an upstairs flat. It sounds like the dogs are getting walked regularly. Not everyone has a large garden for their dogs to run around in. Get a grip people. Dogs do fine in flats.

However you do need to put some carpets or rugs down. Maybe ask him where the noise is loudest and put a thick rug down.

Are you actually allowed a dog or dogs in the flat under the terms of your lease? Usually there's a covenant to say you need freeholder permission first and even that permission can be revoked at any time.

If I were you, I'd do anything I can to make the noise less for your downstairs neighbour, starting with carpet or a runner. I imagine the noise from the dogs trotting up and down has driven your neighbour mad and to the end of their tether.

I would be checking the lease (which applies whether your partner is a leaseholder or owns a share of the freehold) - usually dogs are not permitted, and there's often a clause about needing carpets above the ground floor too...

He is dealing with it really badly of course if he's never just approached you to talk about it. But still, I wouldn't want to live where he does...

Does the flat lease even allow dogs?

I also think YABU and glad I don't live beneath you.

I suspect the OP won't be back.

Two dogs in a upstairs flat is cruel never mind the neighbor

Have you asked to see what the noise is like from his flat? He might say no/you might not feel safe asking but put yourself in his shoes

I'm surprised the rescue centre actually allowed you to adopt the dog tbh. They normally do check that you have suitable accommodation for a dog like that, and I wouldn't have thought that an upstairs flat was suitable. I was asked lots of questions about my living situation when I took on a rescue cat once.

OP, get a foam backed, carpet remnant, it will be very cheap. Put down some newspapers first, then your DP can lay it, he'll need a Stanley knife. Not digging the knife in here, but do your dogs get enough exercise and mental stimulation ?
Could you drop a polite note through the neighbours letterbox, saying that you are trying very hard to resolve the matter, maybe he will quieten down a bit, either that or swap flats.

I agree with just about everyone on here. Lay down rugs/underlay/carpet. Whatever you can to muffle the sounds and drop him a note and maybe some flowers or a bottle of wine apologising and explaining what you are doing to improve matters.

Sorry you are being REALLY unreasonable.

If you can afford to feed TWO DOGS - you can afford cheap carpet for a hallway, you really really can! Do that first.

Go downstairs and tell him you're carpeting the hallway. Ask where else the noise seems loudest. See what you can do to mitigate. Perhaps keeping dogs out of certain rooms.

Must admit I've no sympathy here because two dogs in an upstairs flat plus baby sounds utterly selfish and stupid.

This is all you I'm afraid - if I were your neighbour I'd have complained much more!

Rugs don’t work. It has to be wall to wall. Preferably with underlay.

I think it's sometimes hard to imagine how bad noise can be in another flat. In my last home the people above us had a small cat that used to run about and the noise was astonishing. Somehow it's like the floors amplify it.

That said, it sounds like your neighbor is being quite unpleasant about it. I would try and resolve the issue right away with a cheap carpet offcut or runner in the hall. Perhaps you or your partner could also talk to your neighbour and explain that you're saving for proper carpets but in the meantime are there any times he particularly needs quiet when you could take the dogs out or something?

It's very hard having dogs in a flat, and I think it's probably on you to minimise the disruption to others as much as possible. But your neighbour does sound like a dick so I can absolutely see why it's been upsetting you x