To think my kids should eat the same as me and dh?

[Iwillsurvive1]

So we have friends staying with us who find it absurd (their word) that I expect my dd1 (8) dd2 (5) and ds1 (2) to eat the same meals as me and dh and don’t cook separately for them? I work full time and get home at 4:30 so I cook 1 meal like spaghetti bolognaise, shepherds pie, lasagne etc that we all eat together at 6 ish when dh gets home. My ‘friend’ thinks this is too late for the kids to eat (they go to bed between 8-8:30) and that I should make them something quick and easy so they can eat at 5 before me and dh, she also thinks I should let them choose what they want to eat even if they all want different things but I think this would just make them fussy eaters which I never have a problem with at the moment, obviously if I know they don’t like something I won’t make them eat It like if me and dh have fish or curry they will have something like fish fingers or chicken nuggets something that me and dh wouldn’t want but why would I cook them something different every night? So AIBU?

Well if yabu then so am I

Your friend is mad, ignore.

I swear to God, I bore myself sometimes

You know you are right and are indulging in a little stealth boast here OP, aren't you?
You know very well that posters will all agree with you and you can bask in your superior parenting, as can all the respondents.

She shouldn't be telling you what to do of course so YANBU about that.

But all the pp saying your way is the "right" way and that families that don't all eat together or eat the same thing are doing it "wrong" and will end up with fussy, malnourished childten are being just as judgmental as the OP's friend.

Every family is different with different routines and ways of doing things. It's no-one else's business really is it?

What I don't understand when people cook separate meals or 'children's meals' is, at what age do they expect children to start eating 'adult food'? If you haven't eaten everything from the start why would you suddenly want to eat it? All the people that know who were given separate food as children are incredibly fussy adult eaters. (not including send, sensory issues, allergies etc in this; sometimes separate is needed)

schrodinger I thought your post was interesting. But I’m a total nerd, my favourite subject at school was maths!

God, there are some right weirdos out there (your friend I mean). Unless she was joking maybe? Who gives a shit when other people’s children eat? I can’t imagine reacting any more strongly than “oh” if a friend told me her children ate at a different time than mine .

I think you should tell your friend to mind her own business. Do normal people really eat like her family? She definitely likes a hard life, doesn't she?

If DH got home earlier I would do it your way. However he doesn't get home until 7.30pm most days and DD is falling asleep by 6.30/7 every night. So I will cook one meal, then DD will sit at the table and eat hers at around 5pm. I will sit with her and have a cuppa whilst she eats. Then me and DH will eat when he gets in later.

Me and DD eat breakfast and lunch together and occasionally dinner if DH is working very late/not coming home.

She eats well and when she is older and stays up later we will all eat together, however for now 5 is too early for me to eat (I will then snack later) and 8pm is far too late for her to eat.

We always ate together as a family.

We grew up eating the same as my parents. My mother wouldn't have dreamt of cooking more than one meal.

Of course YANBU. I would like to see how your friend would have coped when I was a child, there was food rationing for the first nine years of my childhood after WW2 and fish fingers and nuggets etc simply didn't exist. Everyone ate together as a family,

Stick to tour guns OP. DS eats the same as us but DD is extremely fussy and has a very limited diet. She often eats on her own meal times are awful and going to a restaurant unless they have margarita pizza can be awkward or embarrassing.

Each to their own, surely?

Most of the time dd1 (14) will eat the same as dh & I. Sometimes she deosn't - like if we have steak. She doesn't always want that, and who am I to force her to eat it? She is happy to help me prepare something else.

Dd2 has asd, and has severe sensory issues, so eats limited foods. Obviously, I cook differently for her.

@Lalliella bless yer 'art for givin' this borin' ol' boot a boost

@schrodingerstwat one person’s boring is another’s fascinating! Is the twat alive or dead btw?

We do to same sort of. We all have the same mean but I eat with the kids, at about 4.30pm and then OH eats when he gets home at 6.30pm. Mainly because my eldest is just starving after school, and they have a 7pm(ish) bedtime

Why would you cook different food for your children your friend is odd. And 6 isn't too late! Carry on as you are.

You know you are right so keep on doing your way and ignore your so called friend what business is it of her's.
When mine where little they ate the same as us from when they where weaned I used to blend everything we had and never had a problem.
There is nothing better than sitting around a table and chatting about your day when enjoying a family meal.Good for you.

YANBU. I was a SAHM when my children were small.The children always at the same as us soon as they were able to. So probably around 2 years old.

With all due respect your friend sounds nuts and should keep her nose out. You sound normal to me.

Is your friend a fucking loon?

I got into the habit of asking my DD what she wants for her evening meal but really regret it, now if I just make her something she won't eat it as she didn't choose it even if it's something I know she likes. Trust me your way is definitely the best way

Sorry but I love your username @onewildnightwithJBJ