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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask about leaving children home alone?

285 replies

ThisLittleKitty · 03/03/2018 17:15

Whats the youngest you would leave a child home alone to pop to the shops? I know everyone's area is different so shops will be further away, but just looking for a general idea.

OP posts:
Original poster
ThisLittleKitty · 03/03/2018 17:44

I was actually thinking around 6/7 just to nip to the shop I mean literally 10 mins (not talking about a weekly shop.)

OP posts:
SomeKnobend · 03/03/2018 17:48

Dd would probably be fine at 8. Ds, maybe at 38!

geekone · 03/03/2018 17:48

I like this question as I have been wondering, so if my 8 year old is asleep do you think I could say walk a dog for 30 mins?

upsideup · 03/03/2018 17:51

Have left left both DD1 and DS1 since 7 for 10/15 minutes but it depends on the child. DS2 is only 4 but I might be less willing to leave him alone at 7, Ill have to see.

flumpybear · 03/03/2018 17:52

I don't leave my 9 year old yet probably because of my 5 year old we all go out together

My best friend takes her dog out whilst her child who is 10 is home alone which worried me a little bit but her Aunty lives immediately next door !

upsideup · 03/03/2018 17:53

geekone

I would think that was okay, as long as they know before hand and both of you are okay with it.

Natsku · 03/03/2018 17:53

Have been leaving DD if she doesn't want to come since she was 6.5 (also started sending her to the corner shop at the same age to get milk etc.). She always has the option of coming along if she doesn't want to stay home, it's about 50/50 whether she comes or stays.

Thehogfather · 03/03/2018 17:57

Dd was 7. Different area and a less mature or even immature child then obviously wouldn't.

former Shock right back at you that you'll wait till he's old enough to travel to secondary independently.

geek I was definitely leaving dd for 20/30 minutes to walk dogs when she was 8, she had a plaster cast and couldn't go out in heavy rain . But, it was daytime, neighbours were home and I went in a loop so I was never far if needed. And not when she was asleep.

BlueLego · 03/03/2018 18:01

Yeah geek I would let dc know beforehand.
Dsis & I had a fright when we were about 7/8 as we woke up and no one was home, we freaked!! We ran around the house for a bit looking and then ran over to our neighbour’s house, who was also my dm’s oldest friend. Both dp were there, having a drink!
I’m 34 now and have never forgotten how scared I was!

NameChanger22 · 03/03/2018 18:01

Mine was 10. I'd go to the shop for 10 to 15 minutes. I thought I needed to get her used to a bit more independence ready for when she goes to secondary school.

SandLand · 03/03/2018 18:01

I leave the 8 year old for 15 mins when taking his little brother somewhere.
I wouldn't leave the 6 year old.
I have keftvthem both for 5 mins, but only when they are glued to screens. If they are playing with each other I wouldn't as it often gets silly.

The NSPCC has some guidelines for when you can leave them. I think it suggests under 12s are unlikely to be nature enough to be left for prolonged periods of time, and under 16 for overnights. Nothing about popping out.

TotHappy · 03/03/2018 18:03

I've left dd in her cot asleep to pop out for 15-20 mins

milliemolliemou · 03/03/2018 18:04

Depends on the child and length of time gone.

My DCs used to leave me alone aged 6 and 8 to play in the woods (rural area). No phones at the time. They were sensible children, nowhere near roads, and knew when to check when tractors were coming.

I might have been less happy/more concerned if they were going down a street.

Leaving them in my own home while I popped down to a corner shop (if I'd had one) no worries providing all fires/gas/boiling kettle were al off. And certainly if they had a phone with me on speed dial.

swingofthings · 03/03/2018 18:05

7 but we live in a close and there's always one neighbour home (three lots of retired couple). I wouldn't have left them asleep though, I felt it was more dangerous than if they were awake as the key part that made me think I could leave them alone was them knowing to get out of the house if anything happened and go to the neighbours.

weddingcrasher29 · 03/03/2018 18:05

@TotHappy I hope that's not true.

lovemynewflowers · 03/03/2018 18:06

@TotHappy if you want social services on your back then I probably wouldn't do that.

shaggedthruahedgebackwards · 03/03/2018 18:08

I would say 8/9 ok to be left alone while you run an errand (e.g. max 20 mins) and then gradually increased as they get older assuming child is happy being left alone and reasonably sensible

I think 6/7 is a bit young unless the shop is literally next door

2boysnamedR · 03/03/2018 18:09

I have left mine with their older 14 year old brother since he was 13 if I needed to be somewhere I didn’t want to drag my young ones. Only for a short while. We have no family to help out and only one babysitter.

Sometimes I don’t feel it’s ideal but I don’t really have options. I wouldn’t have left him before he was secondary age because although he’s clever and sensible he’s not very worldly wise.

Blackteadrinker77 · 03/03/2018 18:09

I've left dd in her cot asleep to pop out for 15-20 mins

Sad
YellowMakesMeSmile · 03/03/2018 18:10

Age 10, not before.

YellowMakesMeSmile · 03/03/2018 18:11

I've left dd in her cot asleep to pop out for 15-20 mins

Sad I'd report anybody I knew doing that to social services.

YearOfYouRemember · 03/03/2018 18:12

My youngest was 11 and I'd leave him for up to an hour alone. The others were at school.

bimbobaggins · 03/03/2018 18:14

I started leaving mine for short periods when he was 11 and going into secondary school after the summer. He would be walking home and have a key to get in after school so we started building him up gradually

Sara107 · 03/03/2018 18:15

I've left my DD aged 8 a few times for short periods (10- 20 mins) and she doesn't like it much, having been absolutely longing to stay home alone!

Thehogfather · 03/03/2018 18:20

tot got to say, my dd has always had more independence than is the norm on mn, but even the most mature and sensible toddler on the planet isn't safe to be left at home alone, even if they are asleep.