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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

He said, I know you like it like that

140 replies

ironbrew · 28/02/2018 14:07

AIBU to have the nark because my DP said 'I know you like it like that' in bed this morning. The thing is, I don't 'like it like that' and I immediately thought it may have been something he would have said to his ex girlfriend because she 'liked it like that'.

I know it IS unreasonable to think like this but it pissed me off.

OP posts:
user1490607838 · 28/02/2018 17:10

Come on...... What was it OP?! Confused

GrannyGrissle · 28/02/2018 17:10

Slapping you round the arse with a fish brilliant! Can always rely on MNers to cheer me up after a boring day snowed in with a 4yo.

WiseOldHag · 28/02/2018 17:17

love MN

andhardlyanywomenatall · 28/02/2018 17:22

a little earworm for your snowy journeys home

DeleteOrDecay · 28/02/2018 17:29

Oh my dp has done this before. Usually something like giving my arse a tap at the wrong moment and when I say stop it he'd say "you know you love it"Angry

I was like yes I do like it when he does that sometimes but when I'm trying to put a load of washing on it's really not sexy or endearing - just annoying. I had to sit him down and explain about how if I say I don't like something he needs to accept that I mean what I say and that I find it degrading when he says that because it's as if I don't know for myself. He doesn't do it anymore.

I feel like if he didn't do the whole "you know you love it" shite then I wouldn't have been bothered but it made me feel like a piece of meat ans I really hate being told I like something especially when it comes to my bodily autonomy. I'm a bit weird probably.

Missingstreetlife · 28/02/2018 17:35

I have heard you are supposed to like it!!
Funny, I thought he would like a slap

Shinycat · 28/02/2018 17:46

@deleteordecay

My DH does this too. He is fine 90% of the time, but at least once a week, he has this massively annoying habit of coming up behind me and slapping my arse, or grabbing my boobs when I've got no bra on. And yeah, he says 'you know you love it,' or 'you know you want it!' (No I fucking don't! Why do you think I do?!'

Or he pins me up against the wall, pressing himself against me, with his face 1 inch from mine, saying 'LOVE YOU!' with a soppy, wet, dopey look on his face! Confused

Or when I am on the way to the loo for a wee, he stands up and blocks my way, saying 'HUG!' And he won't move til I have spent 30 seconds hugging him.Hmm I have had occasions when I have rolled my eyes, and he says 'oh for fuck's sake, you look so ANNOYED. All I wanna do is show affection.' cue head tilt: and hurt look

It's so intensely irritating, it doesn't turn me on, and it doesn't flatter me; it just irks me. He accuses me of being miserable and stuffy, and says 'most women would be grateful for the attention from their husband.' I have actually thought to myself on occasions ' well fuck off and grope another woman then.... ' Hmm

And he has this fucking annoying habit of saying 'sexual' things at inappropriate times. EG, I said the other night 'what do you want for dinner?' and he said 'your pussy in my mouth. Confused

And 'what do you want for lunch?' 'SEX!!!!' he yelled.

Fucking annoying! Hmm

When I have spoken to women about this before (like online or in real life,) they say their man is the same!

Why do they do it? Confused

purplelass · 28/02/2018 17:58

Shinycat you're not married to my exH are you? Sounds horribly familiar...

DeleteOrDecay · 28/02/2018 17:59

Shiny god that sounds SO annoying. Thankfully my dp has never been that bad, I think I'd deck him if he pinned me against a wallShock

I don't know why they do it. I suppose they see a lot of what women are 'supposed to' like in the media, in porn etc. And don't realise it doesn't work that way in real life the majority of the time. Also male entitlement etc.

IfNot · 28/02/2018 18:13

Jesus shiny.
How do you not just knee him firmly in the balls?

rothbury · 28/02/2018 18:15

shiny Thankfully the vast majority of men are NOT like your DH.

Seriously, how do you tolerate him?

OP - where the fuck are you we need details......?

Loyaultemelie · 28/02/2018 18:31

Yes really do want to know what the move was too. Also slightly impressed as my DH would have got swiftly kneed for even making an attempt on a snowy morning. I'd have liked a coffee

Trendy1 · 28/02/2018 18:38

Don't really get why snow makes a difference - you weren't camping were you?

shiny jesus - i wouldn't put up with that from a DH. I have had DPs previously that did that sort of thing. Good for you for putting up with it.

Susiesue61 · 28/02/2018 18:56

Yep, all DH got yesterday was 'it's snowy and I'm stressed!' I need an offer of being rescued in that situation, not sexy stuff!

allaboutme55 · 28/02/2018 18:56

Maybe this was his attempt at a 'line' you know? Like he was trying to be all cool and sexy?

If he was mine I'd have said no thanks lol

MN164 · 28/02/2018 18:57

Kneed rather than "not now, leave me alone"? Really?

Original poster
ironbrew · 28/02/2018 19:02

OK, he was going to come on my back. He has never done this before, so yes I question it. Sorry if its TMI but you did ask!

OP posts:
CaptainCabinets · 28/02/2018 19:20

How...anticlimactic. Hmm

VladmirsPoutine · 28/02/2018 19:27

If you don't want someone to come on your back then that's fair enough. Everyone can set their own sexual limits. But were does the ex come into all this? (forgive the unfortunate pun).

gingergenius · 28/02/2018 19:28

Play him this OP!!

GrooovyLass · 28/02/2018 19:34

Come on your back? Yuk! That with what he said, definitely a porn thing...

Valentinesfart · 28/02/2018 19:38

I feel like if he didn't do the whole "you know you love it" shite then I wouldn't have been bothered but it made me feel like a piece of meat ans I really hate being told I like something especially when it comes to my bodily autonomy. I'm a bit weird probably.

You're not weird that it rude.

shiny Bloody hell Shock

So wait did he ask to do it and then you said no, and he said "you know you like it"? Ok I get now why you thought he had someone else in mind.

Valentinesfart · 28/02/2018 19:40

I think he probably meant "you know you would like it" and thought he was being sexy and porn kingy though.

Dork. Tell him he is not the King of Sex, but a dork and everyone on MN is laughing at his lines.

Also that cum on your back is very inconvenient to wipe off and could he put in a less hard to reach spot.

Valentinesfart · 28/02/2018 19:41

How could cum on your back even be for you?

ON your breasts if you like the visual maybe, but on your back? Really? That's not for you.

AskingForAnEnemy · 28/02/2018 19:52

I have to ask again, how do you know how ex used to like that sort of thing? Did he tell you that?