Am I being unreasonable re. turning 30?

[lilabet2]

I am turning 30 on Sunday, obviously it's a bit depressing but when I've tried to cheer myself up by googling 'Why turning 30 isn't so bad' or 'Why your 30s is a good decade' etc. the only reasons are:

1. You're at the height of your career.
2. You've got your own home, car.
3. You're likely married with kids.
4. You don't need to worry about staying up after 3am or deadlines.

None of these apply to me! So I've missed the mark in every single way and reading these articles is only making things worse!

My life is literally a train wreck at the moment and I'm lucky that I'm not suicidal, just a bit down!

Google "Saturn returns at 29". Many people's lives mess up at 29; it's a necessary way for all the pieces to fall back into the correct order.

Seriously - look it up. It's A Thing.

And happy birthday for Sunday! Your 30s are amazing, I loved mine.

What are you reading?

You can't google your feelings. Don't give so much credence to random websites. I assume this isn't a well known and respected source otherwise everyone would have known this is what they are supposed to have done by an arbitrary age.

Happy birthday.

30 is still young - really!
These days lots of people aren't married or have children, homes etc. And loads of people are still only starting out on a career.

Ignore that list. Celebrate your birthday and have a good time.

Everything will eventually fall into place.

I'm 33 this year and have achieved exactly nothing on that list.

Thanks Whatsgoingoneh- I'll look at it now!

Thanks Pumpkinpii! of course they're not from reputable sources lol, what am I 30? (oh dear g)

Thanks so much Ishouldn'tbesolucky and BD too! It helps! BD, I hope things work out for you too!

Oh and just to say that I know what 'literally' means and that I used in incorrectly...

I'm 39 and have none of those things.

It really is too late for me now.

I'm almost 29 and I guess my career from the outside looks ok (absolutely not at the height of it though!) but I have achieved absolutely none of those other things. I seriously doubt that's going to change very much for me in the next year, if that's any consolation. Many of my friends here in London are in their 30s, live in house shares and are still in assistant/mid level roles. I don't think that list is representative, there's a lot of other factors involved

I wasn't married or a mum at 30. I had a decent job but wasn't setting the world on fire.
Amongst a couple of friends we decided the 30 was brilliant. We didn't have to:
be gorgeous, taut 20 year olds
be able to say fuck it I'm too old for this shit
be able to say, sorry that's a youth thing
AND MOST IMPORTANTLY to stop caring we weren't perfect.
I liked my 30s.

Also, the last one is a bit weird - don't need to worry about deadlines? My entire job revolves around deadlines! So I'm writing off the entire list as tosh because of that statement.

Dear God I lost the sense of that in the formatting and forgot to wish you Happy Birthday

Cheer up, OP! Just think that we'd be fucked if we'd reached the height of our careers at 30 - then what would we be expected to do with ourselves at 50?

Thirty-something single, childless poster here, in a career I enjoy but hasn't proven hugely rewarding so far. My twenties were definitely...how could I say, more full of promise. I still thought I could grow up to be whoever I wanted to be. It hasn't been as exciting as I'd hoped, but it's not half bad either, this 30 malarkey.

Happy birthday!

Have a wonderful birthday. Being 30 is brilliant, it is when I stopped Giving A Fuck (mostly about what other people were thinking about me) and finally felt OK in my own skin.

I'm 32 and I'll tell you why turning 30 isn't so bad:

Because nothing suddenly changes the day you turn 30. It's meaningless. If you wish to make changes in your life, then begin taking steps to do so. How old you happen to be is irrelevant.

The fear of turning 30 is much worse than the reality. I enjoyed my 30th birthday much more than my 29th.

Now I wish I was still 30! You are young and have plenty of time to achieve your goals. And you can still be happy even if those goals change.

I'm 52, and I remember my 30th very clearly. I hadn't achieved any of those things either. I'm now on 3 out of 4 (no marriage, no kids) and that's fine for me.

Have a lovely time. Have a party. Don't compare yourself to others. Your 30s are amazing (as are your 40s. I have to admit, jury's still out on the 50s, but 3 big operations in 3 years probably doesn't help!). Enjoy. And remember, you're MUCH less than halfway through, so think about what you can do to make it fun.

32, renting, no partner, no kids. Student again
As others have said, 30s are great because:
*care less about what others think
*know yourself better
*opinion more respected
*experience counts- you are more competent and skilled
*friendships/relationsjips in general less shallow, more meaningful
*still have youthful good looks ( or most of them!) but-
*old enough to foster air of mystery and allure

My 30's were the decade I started to empower myself a bit and start being much happier.

30's are much better than 20's but stop reading stuff like that and start looking at strong, inspirational women of all ages and make your OWN plans. That crap is written by a gigging content writer on $12 per hour thinking up generic stuff for people to click on.

It means nothing, really.

This kind of 'what you should achieve' stuff is always bollocks, and that list is at least a decade out of date. I'm 40 now and still not at the peak of my career, and when I turned 30 I was rare among my friends in terms of being married and pregnant by that point, and owning my own place (as I'd inherited some money, not because I was super successful).

As I edge towards 40 in a few weeks I honestly just feel lucky that I have reached this age . My 30’s were a much happier time than my 20’s .
It’s only as big as you make it and I fully intend not to be down about 40 but hang out with people older so I feel young 😂

I hated turning 30. My life wasn’t where I wanted it to be At All. I totally get how you feel.

But, you know, my 30’s were definitely the roller coaster years! A lot of highs, some serious lows and A LOT of spinning around.

TRY to see that no matter how you feel right now, thirty IS still young. But it’s time to sort out things that aren’t working for you & focus on how you want your life to be.

Have goals & plan your future, but live in the moment because it’s actually all we have and we simply don’t know what’s around the corner. Don’t waste another minute being glum, life is too damn short. 30’s nothing, enjoy it 💐

I am turning 36 on Friday and I am not where I wanted to be in life, couldn't give a shit tbh.

My main thing I am concerned with is getting what I want this year and then I will figure out everything else out in 2019

Height of a career at 30 ? What happens for the rest of the time, then ? I can't think of any career that reaches its height at 30, with the possible exception of some sports and looks centric ones.

It's a list of twaddle.

30 did seem a significant one, in a way that later milestone ones haven't - partly a bit negative, as I realised that the endless 20s were, in fact, ending but also, as others said, you start to care very much less about what others think and have a much better sense of yourself.