Tv in room of a 3 year old

[IAmMumWho]

Our 3 year olds have a tv in their room, they share.

My moan is DH let's them watch it on a weekend morning so he can get extra sleep. I'm up from 6am every morning and sometimes don't hear the kids in their room talking or whatever.

I don't like him putting it on, would rather he

1. come down with them and watch lounge tv
2. bring them down go back to bed and they watch lounge tv.

I don't think kids at that age should have a tv in their room. What is everyone else's thoughts on this. I never did so I think that's why I have a negative view on the matter.

Just to make it clear it's for a Saturday and Sunday morning only while DH gets extra sleep. Not every morning! As I'm the main carer when he's at work so I don't let it happen

@bridgetbishop

Watching tv In lounge or playing games on tablet. I'm in bed by 10pm latest up at 6-6.30

Meh, an hour of tv whilst your DH sleeps and you do your chores is fine. Set rules on what and how much they’re allowed to watch.

@Lallypopstick are these words are banned or something? Did I not receive the MN memo

This is a ridiculous comment

@DearMrDilkington

Yes he is.

And getting up at 8 during the week is no great shakes either, so I’ve no sympathy for him there. Most people get up much earlier than that and manage to see a weekend without mouldering in bed for half of it. Lazy, boring git.

9.30 and he's just got up. This I don't mind as kids are fed watered clothed and we're chilling. Hopefully our day as A FAMILY will begin soon.

*I appreciate all comments good and bad

Things will change and I'll stop being a stepford wife and general of the household.

By for now!!*

I'm really confused sorry if I have missed something?
You're at home while he puts the tv on in kids room?
I'd just get them all up inc DH and insist on a family day out. However I don't see the harm in them watching their tv one morning a week.

OP there are some posters with a pathetic gang mentality on MN whereby using the words ‘hun’ or ‘hubby’ are somehow against the unspoken, arbitrary rules of their collective...even though actual people use them in rl all the time. Take no notice. It’s not worth responding to.

I am still agog at you getting up at 6am EVERY DAY when there is really no need to 🙄. What earthly reason would necessitate this? I get it if you're off out to work of course (I'm up at 6am in the week because I have to leave for work by 7am!). But I utterly fail to see why you'd need to do this when clearly your DH and DCs are not even up at that time! If you actually cannot do your 'household tasks' without getting up at that time 7 days a week, there is a real problem with either your time management or your perception of what 'needs' to be done. How do you think full-time working mums get on? Seriously...chill out!!

I've only just got up but ds is nine when he was we took it in turns to get up at weekends. 3yo need adult supervision. The tv in the bedroom is a personal choice but you both need to agree to it. He needs to do more when he's home if there are 2 parents the work should be split fairly (not necessarily 50 50)

Surely your bigger problem is your h. If you cannot agree on such as an issue as tv in their room or when they can watch it will get much harder as your dc get older and they will learn play one parent off against the other. You can do washing with them in the house though, you seem to want to be a martyr to the cause. He equally could tidy up or put it on while you do bath or vice versa.

I think there is quite a big physiological difference that you’ve probably forgotten about from working. He gets into work and is obliged to do things. He’s just trying to get some down time from being on “someone else’s” time 38 hours a week.

I know you’re busy- you really do sound it- but you’ve chosen a lot of it, as you say yourself, from a position of relative freedom. You like getting up at 7 and pottering- he’s just attempting to have an hour or so a week just for him. I really don’t think the tv as a babysitter is a big deal for the time you describe.

You seem to have quite different parenting ideals. The way I look at it is- you chose to have children together. If you divorced, he’d likely have them every other weekend and he would do whatever he wanted with them during this time, with zero input from you.

Kind of puts it in perspective when you wish to micromanage every hour of the day I think

@Northernknickers

I'm up at 6 because I make DH lunch and kids lunch, do last nights pots and put a load on to wash.

Then I get kids up at 7 sort them out ie get them dressed, give them their breakfast supervise them doing their teeth, let them play till we have to set off for nursery.

T1 is a slow eater so one slice of toast can take up to 30 mins to eat T2 is a quick eater and is done less than 5 mins of giving it.

Even at weekends? 🙄

I’m an early bird. I get up at 5.30 during the week and rarely sleep longer than 7.30 at the weekend. I was chuffed this morning because I slept till 8 which is a big long lie for me! I can’t conceive of regularly wasting an entire morning of free time sparko. Life is too short for that shit.

But they only do 2.5 days a week st nursery so that surely means at least 4 mornings a week they don’t need waking up?

You get up at 6 to make lunch?
A sandwich takes minutes to make and Dh can make his own

I would definitely be doing the pots before bed.

I'm still a bit at changing the sheets & clean PJs every single night! That really is a bit over the top, unless they have night wetting issues.

Husband's clothes, maybe 2 washes a week. Twins clothes, probably the same, maybe 3 if they are messy including nightly PJs!). Your own, possibly less as you don't have a dirty job or need clean office clothes every day. Or max 1 wash a day for husband, twins and yourself for the previous days clothes. That leaves 2 washes every single day for bedding, towels etc.

Why do you need to be up at 6 to make lunch when he gets up at 8? Plts can be washed in the evening surely instead of leabing until the next day, much nicer to wake up and not to have to do that. Can't he makehis own lunch by getting up 10 minutes earlier?

My Dh is up at 4.30am for work, sometimes I make him lunch to take the night before, sometimes he does it in the morning .

Sorry but I think you are being a martyr and are over doing things. For your OWN physical AND mental health you need to chill.

They DON'T need a bath every day (it's actually not good for their skin either), why are you waking them? If it's to get to nursery fine but if it's just because you think they "should" be awake that's bonkers.

Dh could be doing more BUT I suspect he gets little say in parenting/household issues - his children and home too. Please tell me you're not washing bedding daily, even with a fluffy cat I don't see the need to hoover daily either. Daily shopping too - why? Even fresh stuff like milk lasts 3-4 days, so you shouldn't need to be shopping more than 2-3 times a week if you're organised.

"I cook everything homemade so they have a balanced diet" a diet filled with processed food is not ideal or healthy but it honestly won't do them any harm if you do the occasional beige meal, eg baked beans full of fibre, protein, calcium, b6 and are high in fibre.

"I barely get time for a shower." If that's true I really do suspect you're overdoing it. "I rest when I sleep" so unhealthy. Seriously dude CHILL!

I see nothing wrong in letting the DC watch kids telly till around 10 and dh getting a lie in, it does the kids good to have chill time too.

"I don't get one why should he" no you CHOOSE not to have one - that's different.

"up at 6-6.30" why?!

I see you're now saying you are going to try and relax a little.

Lightheartedness aside you really do need to or you're gonna push yourself too far.

I'm up at 6 because I make DH lunch and kids lunch, do last nights pots and put a load on to wash

Op, you really need to get your lazy arse dh doing chores.

I hardly wash up - dh does that
I hardly make lunches - dh does that (the night before, I will add. Neither of us are getting up at sparrows fart to make lunches)

Stop bathing the kids daily, they don't actually need it.
They don't need clean pjs and bed linen daily either.
We are a family of 4, and I do not do anywhere near 21 loads of laundry a week (dh actually does it, but that's beside the point. We do about 6. and I have older kids who are incapable of staying clean)
We have a dog that sheds madly, still don't hoover everyday (in fact, I don't hoover at all, dh does)

I do a huge chunk of the kids stuff, because our youngest is asd and very against anyone doing anything for or with her, so he takes on a huge share of the household stuff.

You are running yourself ragged. Take advantage of the TV occasionally and enjoy a lie in with your dh . Believe me, as they get older, it gets harder!!!

You don't get time to shower, or a rest because YOU ARE DOING TOO MUCH!

I don't get how this small amount of work requires you getting up so early. What exactly are you making for lunches that is so time consuming?

So what if it takes one child 30 minutes to eat toast - do you sit next to him waiting for him to finish?

I have worked out of the home full time with 3 children and I manage to get all the housework, dinners, lunches and homework etc done around this - as well as having lie-ins and family days out.

You have a few days a week where the children are in nursery to get the work done or to relax.

You do sound like a martyr and I think your husband's way of doing things sounds more relaxed and chilled out. If I were him I'd be fed up of living with someone who is being so uptight.

A 3 year old does NOT need a TV in their bedroom

I would take it out