to feel sorry for my friend with the eco-warrior DH?

[k2p2k2tog]

(sort of lighthearted but not really)

Very close friend is married to a professional eco-warrior. He's employed high up in a green charity and has in the past been involved in Green politics. They have two daughters of school age. Friend also works but not in the green sector, she's a nurse.

Because her DH is a dyed in the wool "knit your own lentil" person, he has to be seen to walk the walk as well as talk the talk. Nothing non-eco. They do have a car, but he cycles to work and she takes the train.

But what makes me feel REALLY sorry for her, and her girls, is that they have bought a touring caravan for all holidays. Despite the fact they're earning good money and could afford a week in the sun somewhere, they spend every holiday cooped up in a tin box so he can show what a WORTHY person he is.

They are currently in Wales. In the freezing cold and rain. In fucking FEBRUARY.

I feel sorry for you OP and your narrow-minded views.

Me too.

I'd much rather be exploring the hills, in a wet and windy gorgeous Lake District or Wales than getting skin cancer frying myself on some gross, packed beach with hoards of children are running around screaming and kicking sand in peoples dances and fat, bald, sunburned men in the background shouting 'OLA PABLO, MORE BEER POOR FAVORR' ... bork.

As they've bought the caravan, they'll use it every holiday.

So it's not a case of going in February to be joyless, but going at every opportunity.

Small DC and hot sun don't really mix anyhow, and there are so many brilliant things to do in GB (of slightly further afield if ferries are OK)

YABU

Has friend said shes unhappy? If she is it's up to her to speak to her dh about it not yours.
Just because you don't like their way of life doesn't make it wrong, and it doesn't mean she doesn't like it.

We have a touring caravan...yes we could afford to go on a sun/beach holiday abroad but we prefer to tour with our caravan. We go all over the country, choose somewhere different every year for our main August holiday and then have shorter more local trips away in the other half terms. (yep even in feb....we have this little thing called heating in the van, and jumpers, and sleeping bags....were rarely cold).

As a child I went on an abroad holiday every year....we would go and sit on a beach or by a pool for 2 weeks. Since having the van we (me, dh and dc) have been all over, seen bronze age caves, been on fairy hunts down caves, medieval castles, neolithic monuments, roman villas, iron age round houses, wild otters/dolphins/seals, as well as beaches with white sand and sea so blue it would rival that of the carribean (yup in the uk) The kids love being outside and get excited about what they will see this holiday.

then have shorter more local trips away in the other half terms. (yep even in feb....we have this little thing called heating in the van, and jumpers, and sleeping bags....were rarely cold).

Change "rarely" to "never" and you might convince me that February caravan hols are a good idea, and I am absolutely not a beach/bar type of holidayer :o

Our caravan is a winterised European brand. Apparently people go skiing in them. Anyhow it's perfectly toasty in whatever the british climate throws at it; we are off for a city break next week.

For about 20 years I had a fear of flying. We still went abroad every year; France, Spain, Italy, mostly camping or self catering (with 4 kids it was our best option. Finally pulled myself together and we flew to Lanzarote for a week. Meh, I don't feel I have missed much.

YABU. If more people lived like that I wouldn't have sleepless nights worrying about the earth my children are inheriting. The one with oceans with drastically dropping oxygen levels and 5.25 trillion plastic particles, the one that's lost more than 50% of its animal life since the 70s and the one that's set to pass 2 degrees above pre-industrial levels by 2050, rendering earth uninhabitable for most.

I don't care if I'm told that means I'm earnest or sanctimonious, most of us are walking around like zombies and we should all be looking to change the way we live.

Apparently people go skiing in them

How the fuck big is it?

:o :o :o :o

Your friend's husband sounds great- I'd marry him, if I didn't already have my own ecowarrior DH.

Somebody has to be the Lorax, OP. Eventually, enough of us will cotton on, and we'll stop degrading the planet and stoking the fires of the imminent anthropogenic mass extinction...

Now please excuse me, I need to steralise my mooncup.

There nothing wrong with Wales in February - when you live here 😁 But a caravan holiday.....hmmm???? You know the saying, "sometimes in Wales it rains" it's all he bloody time, I'm Welsh through and through but a holiday in the sun is welcome every year (mostly in Cyprus.....dreams of retiring there)

YABU. They’ve gone away as a family, probably visiting lots of places and enjoying time together. What are you doing that is so much better? You sound unpleasant OP.

She may feel that she's had her fill of sun holidays when she was younger, and now would rather explore the UK. There are so many lovely places to visit here, and a caravan or motorhome is an ideal way of seeing the UK.

I'd love to have a caravan or motorhome. They're not the tin boxes on wheels that they used to be. They're fully insulated and have either blown air heating or radiators. They also have washrooms with showers, and many have fixed beds so you don't have to pack all the bedding away in the morning.
Being in a caravan in Wales in February is not much different to being in a house.

YABU.

And this I why I am going to Gambia on Tuesday 38c cannot wait to get out of the UK

We have a touring caravan...yes we could afford to go on a sun/beach holiday abroad but we prefer to tour with our caravan.

I love that you felt it necessary to add that it isn't lack of money making you do caravan holidays.

Is he a vegan? Just wondered as travelling by air causes far, far less pollution than eating meat. I am a vegan eco-warrier yet can justify holidays abroard as I stick to a plant-based diet [smug].

I would not be seen dead in a caravan.

Blimey, I'm no eco warrior and I like a foreign holiday as much as the next person but you sound incredibly small minded and snobby. There's nothing wrong with caravanning, you certainly don't need to feel sorry for her and her children on that score when plenty of people get no holiday at all, ever.

It's very sneery to refer to it as being 'cooped up in a tin box.' The point of the caravan is to get you there and to provide you with somewhere to sleep. The rest of the time you aren't 'cooped up' at all, you are outdoors, doing things. Visiting places. Enjoying nature. Even in February.

it's not a case of going in February to be joyless, but going at every opportunity.

Yes to that. I'm sure they have a couple of weeks somewhere sunny and sandy in August too. As well as lots of long weekends away at every opportunity, seeing lovely lesser known parts of the UK that most of us wouldn't never get to visit because they don't warrant a full week's holiday or the cost of a hotel.

"I'd much rather be exploring the hills, in a wet and windy gorgeous Lake District or Wales than getting skin cancer frying myself on some gross, packed beach with hoards of children are running around screaming and kicking sand in peoples dances and fat, bald, sunburned men in the background shouting 'OLA PABLO, MORE BEER POOR FAVORR' ... bork"

Errr, it's possible to go abroad and not go somewhere like that you know. In fact I'd say most people prefer to avoid places like that.

We’ve been glamping in a farm in February. It was freezing and our DC’s favourite ever holiday.

It irritates me that people who make personal, positive choices for the future of the planet are so often looked upon with scepticism / hostility / ridicule.
I am grateful that they are prepared to make sacrifices, I see it as a gift to my children. I don't scrutinise their choices, accuse them of cherry picking their causes or hold them to standards I don't expect myself to meet, just because they have 'picked a corner'.
Most of us live lives which, in some areas come up short of our own ethical aspirations. We do what we can, when we can, and I admire those whose conviction gives them the push to follow through on what we all know is a bleak outlook for the planet, within our children's lifetime, and make life style decisions for the benefit of everyone.
And so what if someone gets a bit preachy or smug on social media? Do I feel judged? At least they're doing something. Good for them, and by extension, good for our kids.
I totally pick and choose, and yes, it is largely based on either convenience or "Fuck it, I deserve this!" Head in the sand. So whereas I have some good eco credentials, I also have massive flaws. But I don't think, and I'd be meh if someone else thought "Ha! Adult used her car for the school run, so why does she bother with reusable san pro!?" It doesn't have to be either / or.
Let's celebrate all efforts and sacrifices of everyone doing their bit.

Having spent most childhood holidays either being compelled to camp in the rain or to stay in a caravan (in the rain), I can confirm this can indeed be really shit.

However, your friend is presumably an adult and can tell her husband, no we are NOT doing that again. Unless he’s actually abusive, which doesn’t sound the case, she is free to go somewhere warm and leave him behind, or look into holidays somewhere warm that still tick the boxes as far as being eco is concerned.

oh how lovely, i would love a touring caravan . hot sun is horriblke. airports are yuk.

OP, your friend should book a holiday to sunny climes for her and DC and tell that Cromwell-of-a-husband of hers to enjoy Blacpool in his tin-can in January. Ha.

Thing is we can't all continue to live as we do , consuming and polluting just because we can and its so easy to do so . Her husband sounds amazing to be honest .

A week in Mallorca in summer. No thanks! I'd prefer Wales thanks but then my family hate heat and other people so we're strictly off season.