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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Partners who sent flowers/balloons to a person's workplace

277 replies

LittleMissUnreasonable · 14/02/2018 17:40

That's it really...AIBU to think this is incredibley showy to send flowers or balloons etc to your partners workplace. It reeks of smug couples and "look at me and this big generic grand gesture I can do in front of as many people as possible ". Understated things done more privately are a lot better and I've never actually seen anyone not look embarrassed to have flowers delivered to them at work. It's done more as a "look what a wonderful DP I am in front of my partners work colleagues " thing....

Yes I'm in a relationship and not bitter. I get flowers and this idea would be my worse nightmare Grin

OP posts:
Lobsterquadrille2 · 15/02/2018 12:08

My DF did this for my DM all the years that she worked - he often worked away so they were rarely together on Valentine's Day. It was his funeral this week (he was 93) and my DM mentioned yesterday how thoughtful and sentimental he could be. So it has left her with happy memories 😀.

Elefant1 · 15/02/2018 12:40

If you are going to send flowers to someone at least make sure there will be someone in their place of work to receive them!- A delivery guy came in to my work place mid afternoon yesterday with flowers for someone in the building next door, only there was noone there Confused Grin

ReanimatedSGB · 15/02/2018 13:12

I do remember being touched by recieving flowers once. The day my dad died, I was in the Midlands (I live in London) and had to stick it out till I could get a train home. I rang DS' dad, who was minding DS, to let him know what had happened, and when I got home, the two of them came in an hour or so later with a big bunch of flowers - DS said 'Daddy bought these for you because he says you're having a horrible day.' DS dad and I are on very amicable terms but not a couple, and I thought it was a nice, thoughtful gesture on his part.

Jaygee61 · 15/02/2018 13:16

YANBU. My DH has never sent flowers to my workplace, not his style at all.

Nik2015 · 15/02/2018 17:47

I would hate it if I was receiving them. But it wouldn’t particularly bother me if someone else was getting them...I think?

MagicNumbers1234 · 15/02/2018 17:52

Yes I'm in a relationship and not bitter.
You come across as very bitter.

Tommo75 · 15/02/2018 17:55

I agree totally. It isn't about making a lovely gesture to the receiver and more about the sender showing off. I'd hate it pkuscyiubgave to carry them home.

scrappysquirrel · 15/02/2018 17:55

This sort of thing makes me cringe!!!!!

A woman I used to work with used to get loads of random gifts like this, anniversary for when they first met, wedding anniversary, valentines, pre Christmas break flowers.... it was mad. I felt so sorry for the bloke as he was besotted and unbeknown to him she was shagging all the single men in the office.

Strongmummy · 15/02/2018 18:11

I think it’s cringey , but would secretly like it. Altho, it would annoy me having to carry the flowers home on the train.

User11011 · 15/02/2018 18:26

I would be chuffed if this happened to me - also to someone else.

I think the worst thing is photographing the things you were bought and then posting them on Facebook. That feels really showy.

Cambiarelnombre · 15/02/2018 18:30

I agree OP, I would cringe and want to die of embarrassment

insmithereens · 15/02/2018 18:35

Yep showy & cringe. I remember an awful colleague & her more awful cheesemeister DP who did this every year - they lived together so there was absolutely no reason for it other than yuk OTT knobishness in my opinion

Witchend · 15/02/2018 18:37

FinallyHere Grin

AlfredTheCat · 15/02/2018 19:54

I'm with you OP, makes me wonder who they're trying to convince - us or themselves?

Finonia · 15/02/2018 20:05

I had an ex that used to do this, he was most definitely marking his territory - like pp have said, why not wait until the evening when you get home?

browneyes77 · 15/02/2018 20:32

The flowers being sent to workplaces I don’t mind.

What I always got annoyed about was the girls that had valentines flowers sent to their work by their OH’s and then made this big fake display of “OMG I’m sooo embarrassed he’s done this” whilst parading them around for all to see, with a huge smug grin and blatantly NOT embarrassed at all Hmm

If you’re chuffed he’s sent them then just say you’re chuffed. Why all the fake pretend embarrassment bollocks?

Now I sound bitter GrinGrin

Sarahrellyboo1987 · 15/02/2018 22:35

I find it VERY cringey! An ex did it once and I was mortified. Very sweet gesture but in poor taste.

rothbury · 15/02/2018 22:39

YABU - it's lovely to get flowers at work.

You sound like a right miseryguts Grin

DreamyMcDreamy · 15/02/2018 22:39

Meh.As long as you're not turning up with a picnic basket and sending round a barbershop quartet, you're alright.

TheCraicDealer · 15/02/2018 22:53

DH sent me flowers yesterday and on my birthday earlier in the year. We've been married less than six months and he's been away for four of them, and we've still got another four months to go until he's back. Luckily everyone in the office knows that and if they've thought it's sad or cringe they've kept it to themselves.

ThePlatypusAlwaysTriumphs · 15/02/2018 22:59

Ooh, lots of miseryguts here!
Married 15 years and DH doesn't ever buy me flowers, he is a very, er, practical person ! Lots of my staff get flowers delivered at work, and I think it's sweet. It makes them feel special, and I think it's nice.
Then, out of the blue this year, DH sent me flowers to work (he is in forces and away)! All the young girls were amazed to find the only flowers that arrived that day were for me! It felt nice. I don't care if you think it's cringy!

Springprim · 15/02/2018 23:04

What a wonderful way to cheer you up at work! I think life is too precious & wonderful to care what people like you think of a loving gesture. Just be nice

Kaybush · 15/02/2018 23:41

I agree with you totally OP!

My DH makes a fuss on Valentines but he buys something on the way home so it's private, and all the better for it.

It does seem very showoffy to send to the office.

blueshoes · 15/02/2018 23:53

I do think it is the partners' equivalent of marking their territory.

I remember the one which was delivered to his office with dry ice.

Original poster
LittleMissUnreasonable · 16/02/2018 00:34

"Not wishing to be rude, but....what the fuck's it got to do with you? Just get on with your work."

Wooow @greensleeves got a bit of a bee in your bonnet there. Everyone managed to put their point across without getting aggressive like you!

Besides when flowers are sent to a place of work it involves a lot of people actually.....the boss has to be called to clear it before hand, front desk have to stop manning and checking security passes at the door to sign for the delivery and someone from the delivery team has to stop what their doing and come downstairs to collect when they have 1001 things piling up so you may think it's nothing to do with anyone because you're happy but in fact quite a few people have been inconvenienced there

OP posts: