To tell these performance parents ...

[pieceofpurplesky]

To shut the fuck up?
In A&E with DS waiting for X-ray results with two very vocal performing parents.
'Look Livvy the book has a chicken. What does a chicken say Livvy'
'Oh Livvy you are so clever'
'Livvy look at the nice nurse. What does a nurse do Livvy?'.
'Stop walking away Livvy, I am reading a story. You need to listen Livvy it's a good story'
And on and on and on

All poor Livvy wants to do is bash a toy car on a table and play with a teapot.

Performance parenting is something completely different which has been explained over and over on here

But the only difference appears to be the motivation ascribed to the parent by the person observing them. This insistence that it's possible to divine that their motivation is to somehow impress passing strangers (to what end? I've never seen a theory other than perhaps insecurity) seems odd. Much is made of the fact that the parents 'look around' while talking to their children, which is apparently the only visible difference between someone talking to their child and someone 'performance parenting'.

But, given that it appears to be completely objective, I can understand that people feel a little defensive and worried at the idea that there is yet another thing that they could be doing, possibly unwittingly, that others are judging them for.

Well said, DoJo

I'm right with you OP.

It's one of the reasons I love online grocery shopping. I don't have to listen to performance parents pointing out foods, asking their colour, what they cost etc. Its just bloody annoying and all a bit "look at me and my brilliant parenting".

Only read the OP and came here to say you should mind your own business.
Their child, their choice.
One of my friends has a child who has suspected ASD. The things she has to do/say to distract him when he is about to have a tantrum!
You need to get a book when heading to A&E, or use kindle. That will help you stay of used on yourself.

@SantaClauseMightWork read the thread. Your pints have been answered many times by me and lots of others.

Points obviously!

Oh and I wasn't able to 'get a kindle' in the emergency of a suspected broken ankle and a phone call from the school.

But you're so insistent that you're right, you and the 'countless others' on this thread. But it's been about 50/50, I think. I still maintain, you're not a mind reader as to parents' motivation for what they're doing. They don't say to you, 'Don't you think I'm a brilliant parent with a super intelligent child', do they??

I just find it hard to believe that a parent in A&E with a child is actually going to care about impressing other people there with their parenting. They must surely have too much on their minds to even have that on their radar. In the Tate Modern, you could be right.

I'm not saying that reading that loudly to a child isn't totally annoying, I just don't buy the idea that parents could care less what perfect strangers think about their parenting whilst waiting in A&E. Unless you've actually had them tell you??

I don't have to listen to performance parents pointing out foods, asking their colour, what they cost etc. Its just bloody annoying and all a bit "look at me and my brilliant parenting".

Really.

To me this is just parenting. My son also counts the number of items he scans with the self scanner thing, loudly too, oh the horror. I would never have considered this something that could be judged. Maybe it’s not “performance parents” with the insecurities after all

No insecurities here @lils888. Quite happy with how my son is thanks. Your son counting on the scanner sounds like something he would have done ... It's performing parents I was commenting on. Which is different.
And @Lizzie48 .... Just as you are insistent you are right/I am whatever you have called me. Only thing is - I was there and however much YOU don't 'buy in to it' you weren't. And I don't lie.