@RhodaBorrocks I absolutely love you.
You took the approach anyone should, although it's clear you have the upper hand in knowledge and critical thinking.
This approach is not Mermaids, and not in mainstream media afaik.
Luckily there are professionals who take this approach, but most mainstream, and even Sen schools, wouldn't have access to them.
I'm so impressed you let him watch the bbc documentaries; I think it should be mandatory for teachers to do so.
I have taught for years. The only children I have come across who have been confused about their sex/ gender etc have been on the spectrum, both professionally and through friends. It's the rigidity of thought and order mixed with the love of the sensorial quality of many "girl" items.
I've seen it in ASD in the other direction too; an older child refused point blank to read a now Disneyfied 'girly' traditional tale, despite it being written at a very 'high brow' level as it was for 'girls' and he's very much a boy.
As in that Bbc doc, I really worry that teachers, esp younger ones, simply don't understand and accept things touted in the media, on tv (and if they can be bothered to read it) the TES. Older teachers and nursery nurses I know seem to be pretty no nonsense about it - but they were trained differently.
The 'old style' nursery nurses had to spend a great deal of time doing thorough observations. The only people now trained to do this would be ed psychs and a few teachers doing specialist Sen courses (which can be a year long) or possibly an MA in Sen.
Which is why I really see the way this child was let down by professionals, both those they sought out as well as those in weekly contact with her through education.