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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be struggling with nursery only opening at 8

292 replies

humpbackwhalestail · 08/02/2018 18:28

I am a teacher and have to be at work for 8:20.

Nurseries only open at 8 which means I’ve had to choose the closest one. It still gives me a tight margin for getting to school, parking, getting into school and to morning briefing/meetings.

AIBU to wish there was a bit more flexibility with childcare?

OP posts:
MissClarke86 · 08/02/2018 19:21

Feeling your pain. I’m also a teacher and my nursery opens at 7.45 but it’s still tight and I never feel prepared enough for lessons which I hate. I don’t like leaving her there beyond 5.30 (she’s still under 1) either so my day is squashed at either end. It’s such a hard job to juggle with a young family. I’m used to just getting in at 7.30 and leaving at 6.30 to feel in control and I can’t.

cantkeepawayforever · 08/02/2018 19:21

That's really tough!

Do you know any of the other parents at the nursery? Might you be able to drop your child with them a bit earlier, and they do the nursery run? you could reciprocate either by doing some full days of childcare for them in the holidays or doing the evening nursery run?

Or might one of the nursery staff be willing to do 30 minutes of child-sitting for you before heading off to nursery with your child in the morning?

I will forever be grateful that my lovely childminder agreed to open at 7.30 rather than 8 and give my children breakfast before school - because their school's breakfast club opened too late for me to go to my own school to teach.

bookgirl1982 · 08/02/2018 19:22

Only one nursery in our town opens 7.30-6.30, the rest are 8-6. I don't know how most parents manage with that. Needless to say they charge a premium!

Have you looked at nurseries near the hospital (if there is one) as they seem to offer a longer day.

deptfordgirl · 08/02/2018 19:24

Oh that's hard. All the ones near us are open 7am-7pm so very flexible.

Original poster
humpbackwhalestail · 08/02/2018 19:24

I don’t feel I could ask anybody else to do it. I just wish there was even an extra fifteen minutes! As then I could get to work at 8. As it is I’m scurrying in at 8:15!

OP posts:
Theclockstruck2 · 08/02/2018 19:24

This is a really annoying thing about teaching! Wish I did something where you can rock up at 9.30! Sympathy OP it’s a pain.

cantkeepawayforever · 08/02/2018 19:26

Or, if you work at a secondary school, are there any sixth formers who would be willing to do some early morning childcare before dropping your child off at nursery? If the school offers any Childcare courses / qualifications you might be able to get whoever teaches it to recommend someone reliable?

Afreshcuppateaplease · 08/02/2018 19:26

I am looking into childminding and thinking of offering early / late hours for this reason!

teaandbiscuitsforme · 08/02/2018 19:26

It's an absolute pain. Earliest I found near me was 7:45 - kids start at 8:15!! No way I could do drop off, Drive the few minutes to work and actually be ready to teach in half an hour.

So I think it's going to have to be a 7:30 childminder.

Lowdoorinthewal1 · 08/02/2018 19:27

It is a hassle if you have an inflexible job. I worked 0.9 for a long time on the understanding I'd be rolling in later and bailing out earlier than most teachers most of the time. However, I'm not technically a class teacher, so that was possible for me.

I am FT now, but have the parent-guilt of ditching my Y3 DS on his school site before he's actually allowed in so I can make it to work in time on briefing day. Fortunately that is only once a week.

Original poster
humpbackwhalestail · 08/02/2018 19:30

It is too big a responsibility to hand to someone else. I need to drop my child off myself, really.

I would too Afresh!

OP posts:
Discusting · 08/02/2018 19:34

Monoblock it doesn’t work like that in teaching. You have to be in on time as otherwise your class are unsupervised.

Also nannies, au pairs etc aren’t an option for some people. On these posts I think people also assume everyone lives in London where childcare is more readily available!

Where I live there isn’t a single registered childminder for 15 miles, never mind a nanny or au pair!

Luckily my childminder starts at 7am but she finishes at 5pm which makes it difficult for me to pick up on time at the end of the day. She was hard to find but doesn’t live anywhere near my house!

Bobbybobbins · 08/02/2018 19:34

Argh that's tough. I'm a secondary teacher too with a 30minute journey to work. I feel very lucky that ours open at 7.30 as I wouldn't be able to do it otherwise Sad

Schoolchoicesucks · 08/02/2018 19:35

OP would you dc's nursery key-worker (or another staff member) be able to mind them at your house for 15/30 mins and take them in to nursery?

Flipflop Congratulations on the job offer. Would it be possible for them to be flexible on your start time? Depends on the kind of role I know, but for the sake of 15 minutes seems a shame to turn it down without asking. Could you ask to take a shorter lunch break or finish 15 minutes later?

Foodymucker · 08/02/2018 19:37

Childminders are generally more flexible , as one myself I’m genuinely interested why people prefer nurseries ?

WTFIsThisVirus · 08/02/2018 19:37

I'm really surprised, I thought half 7 was the norm. Most of the nurseries around us are from half 7 to 6/6:30pm. DS does a full day because of our working hours /commuting. Maybe it's because we're in a commuter area. YANBU.

Original poster
humpbackwhalestail · 08/02/2018 19:38

I just didn’t take to the childminder. And the nursery is lovely. I just wish it opened earlier.

OP posts:
Lucymek · 08/02/2018 19:39

Today 18:39 ThreeDaysAWeek

A neighbour of mine is an unofficial childminder, she drops children off at local schools and Nurseries for parents who start before the schools/Nurseries open, try something like that?

Yeah so that's actually illegal lol Smile

rebelrosie12 · 08/02/2018 19:39

I'd get a Nanny share. Work out the same price as a child minder and you set their hours.

WTFIsThisVirus · 08/02/2018 19:39

foody I prefer nurseries because they charge a flat fee per day. With a child minder, we'd pay by the hour for 11 hours per day, which would prove more expensive. Also, I like the fact that DS has loads more kids to play with. And I don't have to worry about the childminder being ill, and no replacements!

Original poster
humpbackwhalestail · 08/02/2018 19:41

Yes, the childminder being ill/going on holiday was a big consideration for me, too.

OP posts:
Chasingsquirrels · 08/02/2018 19:46

I'd really revisit the child minder situation unless you are certain you are going to be able to access adequate wraparound care once she is at school - because it is unlikely to get any easier at that stage.

BothersomeCrow · 08/02/2018 19:46

Sympathy. Sometimes you have to rethink - the local childminders may be not what you'd like for long periods of time, but they might well be adequate for keeping your child safe for half an hour and getting them to school without being run over.
Failing that then you'll have to try an arrangement with other parents, asking nursery staff if they could collect your child on their way in, for a small consideration, re-jigging hours at work...

cantkeepawayforever · 08/02/2018 19:46

How long have you been at the nursery? Is it worth asking them whether they have surveyed demand for opening at 7.30 recently - as it may be that there is sufficient demand for them to consider changing opening hours?

I apologise for 'solutionising', if what you really need is simply sympathy, as I know I find it really annoying when DH comes up with 'what about X' or 'you could do Y' when all I want to do is have a bit of a moan and a wish that things were a little bit different!

woodlands01 · 08/02/2018 19:47

I am a secondary teacher and like you got used to being in school 5 mins before I had to when my kids were in nursery - very difficult but had to be organised for the next day the night before and insisted on having a proper computer rather than a laptop - so I didn't have to set it up in the mornings!

To be honest when the children were at primary school it was more of an issue and I had to become quite brazen and ask people to help me out. My neighbour took my kids to school for 2/3 years before her son went to secondary. Then I had a very close friend who lived near school and I dropped them with her every morning and they all walked up together. The fantastic thing was being a teacher gave me some flexibility in being able to help them out too. I could (with METICULOUS organisation) leave school on time most days and reciprocate favours - taking the girls to ballet, having them round for tea when their brothers had to be at football, providing cover during the holidays - which was great for my children too as they had friends around to play with.
It's a very long story but we were able to help my neighbour out many years later when she lost her driving license and her son needed lifts to the bus stop.

I think it's one way or the other - you chose to pay for child care or you decide to do it with other people. Before anyone calls me a CF I am still very close friends with all of the people who helped me out and my children are now older teenagers (which brings on a whole raft of other issues and worries).

I am also lucky in that I teach in a shortage subject and have had fantastic HODs who do not worry that I am late in, leave on time etc. etc. As long as job done and results OK it's fine. I know several other colleagues in other subject areas where such flexibility has not been accepted.

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