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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think choosing your wedding dress is not the magical experience I have been peddled?!

319 replies

HarrietKettleWasHere · 29/01/2018 21:48

I chose my wedding dress this weekend.

I don't feel joy. I feel relief that I may never have to go through that experience again Grin

I went on my own because I always shop on my own. I am no virginal slip of a bride that I thought I required a chaperone (32 and well...I had a lot of fun in my youth Grin) and I know what I like. Also I'm NC with my mother at the moment and my best friend just blindly says I look lovely in everything, even the time I looked like a Creme brûlée at our sixth form prom.

I paid £10 before I was permitted to look upon the dresses. This was supposed to include a glass of fizz, but the lady had run out, so I had a tap water.

The lady was nice, but even though I told her what I wanted, she brought me lots of netty monstrosities 'just to wow' me Hmm they did not wow me. I looked like the toilet roll lady my Nan used to have in her loo.

I normally wear a size 10. Some of the dresses in a 14 wouldn't do up Blush why do they cut them so tiny?! I have a little bit of Christmas pork to lose but still...

I found the dress I loved. The price tag was £1800 Shock I'm wondering whether to just put a down payment on it, which seems like a good ideajust so I never have to repeat this process ever again Grin I am horrified at that amount of money, but it was truly the only one I thought 'that looks amazing even though my hair is stuck to my face, I'm not wearing the right underwear and I've just bloody well had enough'

It looks like it's a lovely magical experience on TV!

When my friend got married last year, she went to a place where you ring a little bell in your changing room, to signify you had found 'the one' (dress, not fiancé, I presume Confused) and all the other brides to be would come and ooh and ahh at you.

I unfortunately burst out in scoffing laughing when she told me that, and she didn't speak to me for the rest of the day. So while that was not the experience I was aiming for, I was hoping for...oh, I don't know a bit of enchantment! fizz would have helped

Was I expecting too much?Grin

OP posts:
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HarrietKettleWasHere · 31/01/2018 11:40

It's a Stella York so I'm not really sure (not heard of that one) but I'll check it out Smile

OP posts:
PoorYorick · 31/01/2018 11:46

It's beautiful OP!

AHungryMum · 31/01/2018 12:00

Another thumbs up from me!

Stella York stuff is lovely, I tried some on. Same company as Essence of Australia. Full price would probably be about £1k for that type of dress is guess, so make sure it is an actual real Stella York rather than a knock off as others have already advised!

HarrietKettleWasHere · 31/01/2018 12:06

The back. Would I ask them for a certificate of authenticity? Is that thing with designer dresses, so I know it's genuine?

To think choosing your wedding dress is not the magical experience I have been peddled?!
OP posts:
TheDailyMailIsADisgustingRag · 31/01/2018 12:08

I didn’t ask for a certificate... A photo of the labels maybe?

TheDailyMailIsADisgustingRag · 31/01/2018 12:09

The back is lovely too.

It looks like a salon, so I’d guess it’s the real deal personally.

HarrietKettleWasHere · 31/01/2018 12:14

Exciting! I think I'm going to bid. Worse case if I don't like it it can go back on eBay.

OP posts:
VanGoghsLeftEar · 31/01/2018 12:34

I have never been a dressy person. I married my OH in 2005, in a white fitted suit for £75. The pink blouse underneath was £10 from H&M, and my white shoes came from Marks and Sparks for £40 for which I found s cheap embellishment online for a fiver each.

I had to wear a dress for my friend's weddings couple of years later. I picked out a dark red floor length thing, and when I picked it up, decided it was horrible. It didn't suit me at all. The bridal shop lady was a complete Dragon, making pointed comments to the bride and me on "what should be done" despite my friend's wishes. I was glad I never went in a bridal shop for my outfit.

mamamalt · 31/01/2018 12:35

Oh. My. God. I am going for my first trying on appointment on Saturday with DM. And this has put the fear of god into me. 😖
I hate people looking at me and trying things on in general so I was already dreading it. At least I know what to dread expect! Grin

glitterballbag · 31/01/2018 12:38

Absolutely fucking awful- I dreaded it before hand and still don't like to think of it now. If I did it again I would wear fancy dress or leggings

PoorYorick · 31/01/2018 12:39

I didn't have any bad experiences when trying on dresses. The salesladies were all very polite and professional. There was no weird bell ringing when I made my decision, no champagne (just offers of water), no nasty comments about my body, nothing.

Pepperedbeef · 31/01/2018 12:43

You have to pay £10 to basically enter the shop?!?!

PoorYorick · 31/01/2018 12:49

I never had to pay for an appointment.

mamamalt · 31/01/2018 12:52

I like Stella York. That dress is lovely. There are Facebook groups too (help-I’m getting married UK) that have groups attached to them for people to sell their wedding stuff. I’ve found a lovely dress on their jus need to get to the person to try it on!

DiscoMoo · 31/01/2018 16:01

I’m lucky, I found my dress in the first shop i went to and suffered none of the issues that people are reporting.

OP that dress is lovely but be aware that dresses with that style of lace overlay usually have to be shortened by unpicking the lace bottom, cutting the dress and then sewing the lace back on the top. Not a huge deal for an experience seamstress used to shortening wedding dresses. Mine was similar and all the alterations cost £75 total.

dahliaaa · 31/01/2018 23:36

Did you bid OP?

ReanimatedSGB · 01/02/2018 08:39

Actually, the closest thing to this I can remember was going shopping for an outfit to wear to my graduation ceremony, over 30 years ago. I actually bought a white brocade suit and white shoes. The ceremony took place in a cathedral and I said to my mother afterwards 'Well now you HAVE seen me walk down an aisle in white, that will have to do you...'

HarrietKettleWasHere · 01/02/2018 16:06

Haven't bid yet dahliaaa! Am keeping an eye though. Have cancelled my 2nd appointment at the boutique to 'visit with my dress' aka pay the deposit!

OP posts:
TheVanguardSix · 01/02/2018 16:11

Oh I loved getting mine!
Went to a website, ordered one made in China- which was as gorgeous in reality as it was on the site. Got it delivered in 5 weeks. Had it taken in by my local tailor. £150 in total. Bish bash bosh.
I then proceeded to puke on my wedding day. Thank you Norovirus! It wasn't on the gift registry- we didn't have one! But Norovirus was feeling particularly generous and decided to give me the gift that keeps on giving.

As mum says, "it's not about the day."

raspberrycordial · 01/02/2018 16:11

The dress I loved was £1800 too but that was 10 years ago-I couldn’t do it. If I was getting married now I would hit the bridal shops that sell second hand or sample ones-they are usually about 1/3 of the price. You have to appreciate that there will only be one of each dress but at a size 10 you’d have the pick of pretty much all of them.

TheVanguardSix · 01/02/2018 16:12

Oooh that's a gorgeous dress, OP!

JerryGiraffe · 01/02/2018 23:11

I feel your pain. I specifically stated no meringue, net, fluff or frill and was pushed into a fluffy, frilly vomit-inducing affair complete with massive hoop then put on a step to be 'fluffed'! On the plus side i found exactly what I wanted for £1,000 then got it from another shop for £500. Alterations are expensive at a wedding shop but a good seamstress should do the job as well. Good luck

Catkins0877 · 01/02/2018 23:37

I think no matter what dress you wear or who you pick it with...or not..you will probably look fab because you are 😊.I think though you went to wring shop for you and if you can stand it go again to another so you have no regrets later.

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 02/02/2018 11:40

It’s worth looking at net a porter and matchesfashion.com to see what’s available in white on sale.... unless you want v bridal obviously.

user1484313858 · 02/02/2018 12:19

Totally agree. Loathed wedding dress shopping. 99% of dresses either looked like I was a panto extra, or felt like i was lugging around a duvet, with a person wrapped in it.

I looked at so many I literally got 'dress blindness', because actually, they pretty much all look the same...

Also, £10 to look at dresses?? That's mad!