To think I'm not starving my wedding guests.

[MBlaze]

Helpful Mumsnetters, please let me know if this is enough food for a wedding. I think it's more than enough, but DP thinks we need to add more food!

Timings are approximate...

2pm - Ceremony
3pm-5pm - Crepe or ice cream van, canapes (3 each) and drinks
6pm - 3 Course dinner (Vegan and Gluten-free options so nobody should go hungry.)
7ish? - Cake after dinner
9pm - Cheese board with bread, crackers, grapes, figs etc

Surely that's enough food considering the ceremony is at 2 and people can have breakfast beforehand?

DP thinks we should provide more than a cheeseboard after dinner and should hire a fish and chip/burrito van or ask the caterers for something more substantial. We aren't having any evening only guests, so I really don't think people will need another meal 3 hours after a 3 course meal.

What do you think?

Haven't read the whole thing but I echo the poster above who said please don't change your timings on the say so of a bunch of mumsnet randoms (especially as very few people on mumsnet seem to enjoy going to weddings for some bizarre reason or other). Your wedding day will fly by, don't lose an hour of your reception because some people don't seem to be able to last til 6pm without a meal. Put on your invitations that meal is later so people eat lunch first and if you're worried up the canapes to 5 each. But if you like crepes, have crepes! Enjoy your wedding.

But your responsibility deadringer, surely you'd make sure you popped a sandwich in your bag, or arranged your hair appointment earlier?

I think the new timings are great, I've been to a few weddings at 2 pm and never had time for lunch - if all your friends are young I bet many will be visiting hairdressers or spending ages getting ready. Poss even having a drink or two! Even id want to be ready for say 1pm. I'd not even consider that the meal would be 6.

I'd go for 3pm, ceremony til say 3:30, then meal at 5.30- most meals last a good 2 hours at least with speeches etc?. I think 2 hours (5:30) is fine for your age group with the nibbles you've said now that they'll defo have had lunch. That later hour will make a huge difference.

I do think you need a proper buffet tho about 10. I'd expect more than a cheese board. Most weddings I've been to last past midnight and I expect you're age group to last even later I expect! People will get the munchies. I'd serve something hot. I disagree with it going to waste. Fish/chip conrs and bacon butties etc normally disappear quick!

Don’t go for 3 because of this thread if you wanted an earlier ceremony. The day really does fly and whatever you do, someone will moan so do whatever makes you happy unless it is totally inhospitable (which your previous plan wasn’t). That said I think afternoon tea sounds lovely and would probably be better for the masses than crepes. That would give lots of food if you’re still doing a 3 course dinner and something in the evening.

We completely over catered for our buffet and had far too much left over so a cheese board would have actually been perfect for us.

OP I think all your plans sound great and very reasonable. What has surprised me about this thread is that some posters are saying they cant go 4 hours without stuffing their faces with food and will melt if they aren't fed. No wonder our society is so obese.

Sounds good op but I honestly don't think you need afternoon tea! If the ceremony is at 3 then everyone will definitely have had lunch and they want an appetite for their dinner.

Only saying that to try and save you money As mentioned above, do run it past your venue as they are the experts

It's not 4 hours though! For most people it's likely be 6-7! Yes some people would eat and indeed they should but with a 2pm wedding, most people wouldn't have eaten past 11. It's ok saying that's their fault, but no one wants people moaning about their day and a meal at 6 after 2pm start is way way too late. I'm guessing it's a civil wedding in which case it'll be done in 20 mins

The OP said 90% of her guests are local, mostly from their home town which is 7 miles from the venue, and no one would be traveling a long way on the wedding morning. They are also young. Do 25 year olds need several hours to get ready before a friend's wedding such that eating lunch between 11.30 and 1.30 or so is impossible? OP just let people know the general timings, I'm sure they will be fine.

If they're not working to go to the wedding they won't be getting up to have breakfast at 8 and lunch at 12. Most likely a late breakfast than straight into wedding prep which for a lot of women involves a trip to the hairdresser and possibly make up as well.

What is it about fish and chip cones? I'm struggling to understand why anyone would want fish and flipping chips either just before or just after a three-course dinner...

Sounds amazing omg. 😍

Plus the OP is planning to serve substantial snacks for two hours in the afternoon. No one is going to be left to starve unless they choose not to eat anything all morning and are fussy about the food being served in the afternoon. In which case seriously they should cater for themselves.

OP if you want to save money (and please don't bankrupt yourselves for a wedding) then start at three, have a generous tea time buffet at four or fiveish, something informal like crepes or fish and chips later on and dump the canapes and the three course meal. Unless you and your guests like formality as you pay a premium for it.

Otherwise stick with your current plan and just tell your guests when you plan to feed them so they feed themselves properly in the morning and bring snacks if they are likely to fade away.

Yeh, fuck off with fish and chips,in a cone

It's not the amount of food it's the timings.
That's my view too.

Unless the guests are within 30-45 mins of the venue then the likelihood of getting lunch before is slim. Alternative could involve having a small brunch but then that's still not a full lunch so people will be hungry. If no guest has to travel then it's probably doable.

I still stand bt my feelings about venues having 2-3 hours of mingling with canapes & 1 glass of fizz. It's the part of weddings I absolutely hate as a guest, which is why we didn't have it at ours.

Considering how many people here are commenting on food and hunger at weddings and how it's almost always a featute og people retelling wedding stories, it still baffles me that some people are of the view that considering guests isn't important because 'your day = your roolz"

Thanks to all who have commented that the new timings sound good. we will speak to our wedding coordinator and see if it works best for everyone.

Nooka - thank you for reading my posts! seems like quite a few other posters haven't, but after 16 pages I can't blame them

Aridane and Athena - I'm not sure why fish and chips are so popular either

Maisy - Don't worry, my guests will be having WAY more than 1 glass of fizz . And more than just canapes with it too. And most people will be travelling for less than half an hour.

As we are one of the first of our friends to be married, I think expectations will be pretty low . The free alcohol and food will be enough to please most, and almost everyone will know each other so I don't think people will be too annoyed about the 2 hour drinks reception. Although we will still do our best to make sure everyone is happy and keep it as short as possible

What's the point of the ice cream van? Sounds ridiculous. And people will fill up on these snack items and spoil their appetite for the meal.

Why can't you move the wedding breakfast forward? Then serve more of a buffet in the evening. And I'd suggest putting food timings on the invite so people know what to expect.

Bloody hell.

Weddings have gone mad according to this thread. No wonder they cost a fortune. I'm glad I did it 20 years ago when you didn't have all the hype.

I would have thought all the crepes-chips-ice cream-canapés at 3-5 would spoil people's appetite for a three or more course rich meal at 6. Surely it's a celebration feast which is plenty in itself.

If I went to a wedding at 2 I'd have a small lunch first, expect to enjoy a bit of fizz on an empty ish stomach from 3 , have the main meal (we had a hot buffet) about then speeches, ceilidh say from 7 with cake and coffee at midnight.

I don't expect entertainment except good company, speeches and music.

Saying that OP, your original plan was great especially as the thread shows that I am totally out of touch and people do want to eat all day.

Just do it your way and best wishes for a happy life together.

Main meal at 5, which is what you're doing. All the people who don't want to eat extra before the meal can just drink.

Totally unrelated but a op mentioned most weddings lasting past midnight. Would a crowd of 25 year olds not keep partying till morning or it generally done and dusted by 1am?!

I don't like the hanging around while photos are done either. Not sure why so long needs to be devoted to set piece pictures most of which no one will ever look at. But we didn't have any professional photos done and I regret that too.

However on this one the OP says everyone local, most from the local town which is only 7 miles away. So half an hour drive seems likely. Plus her plan for unlimited sweet and savoury crepes and what sounds like an open bar is pretty generous. I think her guests will be all right.

Bloody hell, I just can't win can I?

For some it's not enough food, for others it's will ruin people's appetites and is "ridiculous".

I'm going to be sticking to what I've said upthread about changing timings to be more suitable, and having afternoon tea instead.

Slane - Our venue have said that guests have to leave at 12, but I'm sure they will carry on partying somewhere else

Thanks to everyone that have wished us well!
I hope our guests will enjoy our wedding, but in the end, the main thing is that I'm marrying my best friend!

Maisy - Don't worry, my guests will be having WAY more than 1 glass of fizz. And more than just canapes with it too. And most people will be travelling for less than half an hour.
In which case I retract my reservations.

The last few weddinga I've been to have involved lots of guests travelling and yhen spending 2-3 hours mingling getting hungry (and grumpy!). It's not too bad if there is a reasonable social group, like about 8 uni friends catching up, but when you're lome friends like we were at one of DH friend's wedding then it was horrifyingly awkward.

Heavier nibbles like mini quiche, sandwiches etc would be my preference over fiddlu little pastry things the size of 50p pieces.

It's nice to see you've thought about your guests unlike some of the 'but it's my princess day' rubbish.

People haven't got time for lunch because they're getting their hair done. The world has gone mad.

I'm definitely out of touch and would commit the faux pas of turning up without professional hairdo and makeup, and that was normal even for the bride when we got married.

It doesn't take 5 mins to eat a sandwich. If you prioritise hair over lunch don't blame it on the bride if you haven't eaten lunch by two.

At the end of the day you are providing food, entertainment and choosing them to share your special day. You will always have someone who won’t be happy. Honestly I think you have a good enough plan. As long as your happy don’t let people intimidate you to changing because of their forceful opinions.

We went to a similar wedding a few years ago and have to say that by the evening people were looking for food. We had young children and our hotel was over an hour away so left about 10pm and stopped on the way to get something to eat but I felt a bit sorry for those left behind.
Maybe a hog roast to sop up the drinking