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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be dreading the day ahead?

214 replies

hidinginthenightgarden · 24/01/2018 08:16

DS is off school ill. DD (age 2) is home with us.
DH is out from 7.30am-6.30pm and we are going to be pretty much housebound!
Even if DS feels up to going out a bit later on, the weather is awful and so far not suitable for parks, at best a ten minute walk when it dries up a bit may be possible. We normally go to a support group on Wednesdays but whilst I am very tempted to go (it is not for illnesses) I don't want to make anyone ill.
So far I plan to cook a pie (should take up an hour or so on and off), a short walk if the weather is okay, some painting, a morning bath for them and hopefully they will both have a nap.
That is not going to keep us busy for 11 hours!
I am already resenting DH (he booked onto a course this week to have a change from the office with no thought as to how this would impact on me and the extra work I have to put in alone) and feel like I am going to be snapping by the time he gets home.
The only light is that DS is eating much more than he did yesterday so is hopefully getting better.
Feeling very sorry for myself..

OP posts:
Anymajordude · 24/01/2018 09:08

Another call for you to get a grip. It's a day at home looking after your own kids FFS.

Original poster
hidinginthenightgarden · 24/01/2018 09:09

Onlinedetective- McDonald’s is a good idea but I have already prepared lunch in my boredom! Ds has been up since 5am and the day is already dragging. We may pop out for some batteries for a Xmas toy that hasn’t had use yet due to needing some strange battery type!

OP posts:
Panda81 · 24/01/2018 09:10

YABU

try being a solo mum who is always on their own, day in day out.

I spent a whole WEEK housebound with a baby due to me being poorly (but still had to look after the baby) and then the baby got poorly.

It's one day. In fact it's not even one day. It's 11 hours Hmm

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 24/01/2018 09:11

Huh? Dh couldn't have known DS was going to be ill. It's just one day. Make the best of it that you can.

Original poster
hidinginthenightgarden · 24/01/2018 09:12

I have no problem looking after my kids. I have a problem with being stuck in the house alllllllll day. Perhaps I will take them to playgroup, is that a lesser evil than being bored because I think I have seen people get less stick for that than what I am being grilled for ffs.

OP posts:
BitOutOfPractice · 24/01/2018 09:13

Well you've clearly decided in advance that it's going to be hell on earth and are determined to be grumpy and argumentative about it. (I think we all do that sometimes by the way - decide in advance that we are going to hate something). So you've almost set yourself up to fail

When I feel like this, if I can manage it, I try just to be very upbeat and breezy and fake it till I make it.

It won't be as bad as you think if you decide it won't be. If you're lucky the kids will also pick up on the breezy cheeriness and all will be well

Only1scoop · 24/01/2018 09:13

'Perhaps I will take them to playgroup,'

I thought one was I'll

Only1scoop · 24/01/2018 09:13

Ill

Not I'll

Chienrouge · 24/01/2018 09:14

It is crap being stuck at home in the rain with poorly toddlers. Mine are like dogs and need to be exercised for hours a day. It won’t be as bad as you think though!

Whywonttheyletmeusemyusername · 24/01/2018 09:15

Welcome to my world...except I've got 4 kids...work full time...and I'm a widow. ...suck it up

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 24/01/2018 09:15

Why would you take a sick child to a playgroup? How selfish is that that.

TournesolsetLavande · 24/01/2018 09:15

Even without DS being home ill today, the extra hours alone mean that I am getting kids ready and (with the exception today due to illness) and out to where they need to be with 0 help, go to work, collect kids on my way home, make tea, clean up afterwards, put the washing on, bath the kids and will be putting them to bed too because he put one of them to bed last night whilst I went out, I still then had no hang the washing up when I got home!

That sounds like a pretty normal and manageable existence to me, yet somewhere along the line you've decided you've drawn the world's shortest straw. I am genuinely baffled by this.

Missingstreetlife · 24/01/2018 09:16

How old is the poorly one, can he be left for an hour while you walk the baby?

Original poster
hidinginthenightgarden · 24/01/2018 09:16

Onescoop I was being sarcastic.
Bit out of practice- I have been stuck at home all day before, i have always hated it. I am not someone who enjoys lazing around watching tv all day.
And I have left over grumpiness from yesterday which was also a shit day!

OP posts:
Loonoonow · 24/01/2018 09:17

My DC are grown up and moved away. They are well and happy and I am very proud of them, but I miss them and I miss the times I had at home with them when they were little.

The thought of going back in time and spending a day at home alone with them watching tv, having a bath, making a pie, cuddling, maybe going out to splash in some puddles sounds idyllic. If you added to that my DH getting home at 6.30 instead of his normal 9pm it would sound like a fantasy.

Sorry OP I know it isn't the reply you want but IMO YABU. I hope it works out better than you are expecting.

PETRONELLAS · 24/01/2018 09:17

Jeeez mumsnet has changed over the years. Of course you are SO NBU. Poorly child is the pits. You worry. You don’t sleep properly and your routine has been messed up. You are getting on with it and will be fine but totally fine to let off steam here. So what it’s what others do. You’re alright to be sharing it on here. I’d do a few craft things, little drive out then baking and DVDs. Not great with the two year old. Mine needed to get out every day. So did I! Hope all soon okay.

RB68 · 24/01/2018 09:18

Make pie and extra pastry if you can spare it and let 2 yr old loose with pinny rolling pin and cutters, that is at least another 30 mins.

Find some kids yoga/keep fit on u tube and try it out, try not to do much else so you don't get frustrated with kids.

Can 2 yr old have a play date with someone who can collect for a couple of hrs.

Give them a duster and let them play "mummy (or Daddy) cleaning. Dust pan and brush for sweep up after pie making

Make them a tent in the bedroom and let them have a picnic in it for lunch

Wrap up well for a 20 minute walk - just took the dog out its not that bad if well wrapped. Get them to find leaves or twigs for picture making at home, or find some larger pebbles and paint them when home to leave somewhere for others to find (yes its a thing)

Main thing is keep busy with things that are not too exhausting for you. Stick something in the slow cooker for tea or do a one pot for the oven later if you are not eating savoury pie.

Change your own mind set about the day and try and have a day that OH is jealous of!

stitchglitched · 24/01/2018 09:19

YANBU. Being stuck indoors all day with poorly kids can suck. I'm in a similar situation at the moment and it's making me anxious and miserable. I hope your day goes by quickly!

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 24/01/2018 09:19

Yes Petronellas being stuck at home is shit when you've got a sick child but you don't take them out to a playgroup full of other children just because you're feeling sorry for yourself.

It's part and parcel of being a parent. Sometimes it's tough. Get on with it.

DrunkenUnicorn · 24/01/2018 09:19

If one really is sick then don’t take them to playgroup!! Not fair on the ill child nor anyone else at playgroup!

Honestly I think you’re making a mountain out of a molehill. Yes there may be noting bits today but really it’s not that bad. Break the day up with lunch and naps and then you have a couple of slots to fill in with activities. A film, some baking with them, something crafty, on the floor playing with them for a bit and it’s bedtime.

If my husband was only out till 630 I’d be over the moon. I’m on my own with three 7am til 9/10pm most days.

Original poster
hidinginthenightgarden · 24/01/2018 09:19

He is 5 streetlife cannot be left. And right now doesn’t seem I’ll at all! He is just winding his sister up and whinging she is “in his space”.

OP posts:
saladdays66 · 24/01/2018 09:19

Worse things happen at sea.

kinkajoukid · 24/01/2018 09:21

I also think that what you describe is fairly typical for a rainy day/ sick day with kids so don't get the angst.

Perhaps you could all do some dancing/ keep fit to work off some energy? Crafts? Dens? Go ut an splash in some puddles for 10 minutes?

If you want a change of scene then its understandable that your DH does too, and likewise he should recognise you need one. Can he do a bit extra in the coming weeks so you can do something different?

BitOutOfPractice · 24/01/2018 09:22

Like I say OP, I can see you've already decided you're going to hate it. It's a self fulfilling prophecy then isn't it?

Did you read the rest of my post. Jolly yourself along, pretend you're having great fun, then there's half a chance that you might

I can see though that you're determined to think we are all against you

e1y1 · 24/01/2018 09:22

To be fair, if DS is too ill to go school, he is too ill to go out (unless school are insisting he stays off although “well” to stop spreading bugs), but even still.

Also as mentioned, your DH didn’t know DS was going to be ill.

Lots of movies, colouring, crafts and baking, day will fly by.