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Original poster

SAHM/Homemakers - What do you do all day?

996 replies

Fruem · 16/01/2018 20:31

Those who choose to be a SAHM/homemaker, who don’t ‘have’ to work, what do you do all day?!

I’m talking the SAHM’s who don’t work from home. Who don’t have to look after the kids all day etc.

If you’ve done cleaning/washing/shopping etc. How do you fill your day?

OP posts:
badass80 · 22/01/2018 16:35

It’s how you measure your worth.

Even though what I did as a SAHM was very worthwhile I felt I needed to work too

canadianlisa · 22/01/2018 17:03

My kids are at school from 9-3. The school run plus after school playtime takes a good chunk of the day. I clean our big house/ garden / laundry. I cook everyday. I read, have coffee, go to the gym, shop. I volunteer at the school, allotments and will be adding another job. Kids have a few after school activities and we often go to the library. School holidays I look after the children (age 5 & 8).

My previous job was very high stress (child protection) but not great pay. When we added all the costs up it didn’t make much financial sense given the cost to family life. It works for us at the moment but am looking at retraining for the future.

moochypooch · 22/01/2018 17:13

It’s how you measure your worth. It most definitely is for some people - I know a woman that only ever talks about her job. First time I met her I thought she was just trying to impress all the other woman around the table but no on further meetings in various places, parties, pubs, with her kid - it's her only topic of conversation and I can't decide whether it's because she loves it or hates it - but it's always a big drama for her to solve.

JJPP123 · 22/01/2018 17:18

Some women need their job to be happy and that's fine. I don't think it's at all selfish using childcare and working. It's a bit twee but mum being happy is really important, especially when it doesn't make much difference to most children who looks after them so long as being looked after. I'm a SAHM for me, not my children. There are advantages to it for them but there are advantages of a nursery and then different advantages to a childminder, different advantages to being cared for by grandparents etc.
Be a SAHM if you think that's more important to you than your work role. If it's not then don't feel bad about it!

Tullula · 22/01/2018 17:19

The other thing that’s not been mentioned is the amount of school holidays that there are. I think mine get up to 14 weeks a year. That’s expensive to cover if you’re working, and a hassle. At some point they’ll refuse to go to camp - and you’re faced with leaving them all day unsupervised- or playing tag holidays with your partner.

I agree with the poster above - best to ignore these threads in future. Everyone is doing their best, and making it work for their family.
Ignore, ignore, ignore!

lazymum99 · 22/01/2018 17:22

Bloody pathetic.
She should at least pay mumsnet for research

InDubiousBattle · 22/01/2018 17:55

At least we now know what Mirror journalists do all day!!

Rufustherenegadereindeer1 · 22/01/2018 17:55

InDubious

Fuck all?

GrouchyKiwi · 22/01/2018 18:16

Brave woman. Grin

Hey, Daily Mirror. I could write stories for you too! I'm as brave as the goady fucker/lazy journalist OP. Here are some headlines for you:

  • Brave Mum of three goes for a walk on icy day!
  • Brave woman ventures into town centre.
  • Brave poster wonders whether other posters on forum are real people or simply Russian bots.
  • Brave foreigner takes all the jobs.
ImGoingForATwix · 22/01/2018 18:54

I always thought the journalist thing was a myth too but have seen it a few times recently.

Daily Mirror is a proper shithole paper though. Grin

ImGoingForATwix · 22/01/2018 18:59

indubious I don't have it handy now but I shared the the link further up thread yesterday.

ShellyBoobs · 22/01/2018 19:21

I particularly enjoyed the bit where SAH MNers spent their day ...sorting out insurance...contacting HMRC...booking a holiday...

Well that would be an hour or so, of the entire fucking year, covered.

Rufustherenegadereindeer1 · 22/01/2018 19:23

Too much like hard work shelly

Dh does all that

Rufustherenegadereindeer1 · 22/01/2018 19:23

But yeah I thought he was exaggerating how long it takes him

allthgoodusernamesaretaken · 22/01/2018 19:36

This thread has gone exactly the way I knew it would

Yes, I agree soup. I'm surprised it took so long though

Ragwort · 23/01/2018 07:28

I'm a SAHM for me, not my children.

That's how I felt (now working p/t so not so relevant). I wasn't a SAHM because I wanted to be with my DC 24/7 - I just didn't need to work for financial reasons - and I don't view my 'self worth' as an individual to be tied up in my career. So I loved my years as a SAHM with school aged children, I don't feel virtuous about 'being there' for my DC - when DC were young they went to pre-school etc even though I wasn't 'out of the house working' - I was busy doing things that I wanted to do - and that certainly didn't involve housework or searching for insurance deals Grin.

I often wonder how people will cope when they retire if they really can't imagine how they would use their 'spare time'. Confused.

Even before I had DC I was in the fortunate position of being able to choose p/t employment (as is my DH now before anyone says I am being a 'free-loader- off my DH's salary).

PasstheStarmix · 23/01/2018 08:29

I often wonder how people will cope when they retire if they really can't imagine how they would use their 'spare time'.

I think that’s what causes problems for people when they retire. I know a few people who were looking forward to it but then after they actually retired they found it really hard. I used to think how can people have any issues when they’re now off all of the time but now I understand. It must be a massive culture shock when you’re used to working all of the time and now have all of his free time. It is bound to take some adjustment just as going back to work will when you’ve been off a considerable length of time

PasstheStarmix · 23/01/2018 08:29

this

TheDailyMailIsADisgustingRag · 23/01/2018 08:34

Re retirement; I know some companies, (one I used to work for), really manage the retirement process for employees. Loads of training and phases withdrawal from work etc. In my former company I think it was because a few people had retired and immediately had serious health issues - there was at least one death too. They put it down to working like mad and then suddenly stopping. When I worked there I was in my twenties but they insisted everyone take at least one 2 week+ holiday per year, so people would properly relax.

I’m a bit worried about my late 60s aged dad, who is still working in a really high stress job. If he ever actually retires, I have no idea how he’ll cope! He’s not looking forward to it either.

TheDailyMailIsADisgustingRag · 23/01/2018 08:34

Phased*

moochypooch · 23/01/2018 08:34

I often wonder how people will cope when they retire if they really can't imagine how they would use their 'spare time'. My mother's retired a long time, still talks about how busy she is and how she never sits down, it's just her and Dad, the house is spotless - "busy" people are bloody tedious in their need to make sure everyone knows how busy they are! (Of course she sat down and watched tv - but always in the kitchen - so she could jump up and pretend once again that she was really "busy"!)

PasstheStarmix · 23/01/2018 09:18

moochypooch My Mum is similar when she complains that she’s had ‘so much’ washing and so much to do! There’s only her to wash for in a one bedroom flat! You’d think she was cleaning Windsor palace! Bless her...

PasstheStarmix · 23/01/2018 13:01

What a pathetic newspaper; they need to find real news to report

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