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Original poster

DP hit me with a slipper!

144 replies

SlipperShock · 16/01/2018 19:20

I've NC for this.

My fiance and I were messing about, 'play fighting' and we were pushing about etc. He stuck his arse out as if he were to fart so I took my slipper off and chased after him. I threw my slippers towards him but missed deliberately. He then threw them back. (All childish I know). Anyway he called it quits. I went to shake his hand, a way we call it quits.

He then smacks my bare arm, full force with the slipper. It really bloody hurt, made me cry and my arm went bright red. He's hit me so hard that he's left the slippers tread imprinted on my arm Angry

He's apologised and I know he's sorry but I'm bloody angry. First of all he called it quits but then to hit me with such force?

I know this is all very childish. But we do play fight often. I'm completely shocked at what he's done.

OP posts:
bingbongnoise · 16/01/2018 20:28

Sounds like he didn't mean to hurt you, and he got carried away. Similar things have happened to me with my husband several times in the past, and I have cried a couple of times (coz I'm a big fat wuss! Blush ) But he has never meant it and has given me full permission to hit him hard. (I never do obvs!)

Why did your bloke whack you even after you had both called time on the 'playfight?' My theory is that some men also don't rest until they 'get you back' for something. Even if it means stinging you a bit. Let him know it fecking hurt and not to do it again, and don't sweat it.

@iliketeabagging (page 1.)

Saying I hope you don't breed is fucking nasty by the way. Grow up!

And saying they are so childish, and 'grow the fuck up!' is mean and bitchy too. This smug and supercilious air of superiority some posters have got on here, because they don't 'playfight' is plain ugly. Hmm

Like a couple of others here though, I dislike playfighting too (and haven't done it with my husband for 10-12 years or more...) It does sometimes end up with someone getting hurt. Perhaps don't do it so often @slippershock Smile

Brightredpencil · 16/01/2018 20:29

I also don't give a shit if people think I'm po-faced. I think I'd rather be po-faced than have the imprint of a slipper on my arm...

Wilburissomepig · 16/01/2018 20:29

No wonder you don't enjoy a bit of light hearted play fighting!

Yeah you're right cushions, I'd love it if DH whacked me with a slipper. So harmless.

throwcushions · 16/01/2018 20:29

OP, in between the playfighting is for pathetic people with no sense of humour debate you have had some good advice. How are you going to approach this? Have you discussed it with your partner yet?

Starlight2345 · 16/01/2018 20:31

I think missing the point you threw a slipper at him ( deliberately missing🙄) this wasn’t the tickling thing some people are talking about because you could of easily hit him by accident . I also don’t see the point of the thread . You will continue .

Gabilan · 16/01/2018 20:31

Yes, it could all be a bit of lighthearted fun that went wrong. But I would just be a little bit wary and take time to reassess a few things. Playfighting with one ex of mine was one of the things that helped me realise he wasn't a particularly nice person. He used playfighting as an excuse to show that actually, he was stronger than me and could use that strength against me.

And whilst I know that not everyone would abuse the situation like that, undoubtedly some people will. So I would just think through a few other things and see it in context. Is he a good guy who stuffed up, or is there a nastier side to him?

throwcushions · 16/01/2018 20:31

Wilbur, I think you are employing a non-sequitur there. The issue raised by OP is quite different to the general question as to whether it is reasonable for consenting adults to playfight. Hence the "light hearted".

Dipitydoda · 16/01/2018 20:33

Do people over the age of 8 actually play fight. As all children know it will all end in tears.

WorraLiberty · 16/01/2018 20:35

I also don't give a shit if people think I'm po-faced. I think I'd rather be po-faced than have the imprint of a slipper on my arm...

How is accepting that some couples play fight and some don't, without looking down on them, going to give you the imprint of a slipper on your arm?

Aeroflotgirl · 16/01/2018 20:35

Oh god the holier than thou people are on this thread tonight.

Reallytired17 · 16/01/2018 20:40

Believe me I am FAR from holier than thou, and I am surprised myself at my reaction.

But two adult play fighting and one ending up crying? Come on.

MrMeSeeks · 16/01/2018 20:42

ome people really do like to look down their noses at others, don't they. This is probably the most patronising thread I have ever read.
Agreed.

bingbongnoise · 16/01/2018 20:51

@Reallytired17 But two adult play fighting and one ending up crying? Come on.

Oh FFS, stop being so condescending!

BattleCuntGalactica · 16/01/2018 20:52

Right well, you’re both grounded, and now go to your rooms and have a good think about yourselves. 🙄

MagicMojito · 16/01/2018 20:53

Some of you on this thread Confused Hmm nobody is forcing you to do it/like it or in any way partake in it! Can you really not understand that different couples do different things that you might not enjoy without them being pathetic or any of the other nasty pompous sneering things that have been said upthread?

Me and dh sometimes play fight, usually one of us takes it too far and the other ends up getting hurt. We genuinely laugh it off (at the same time as apologising whilst still giggling at whoever came off worse) we have a fab marriage, have respect for each other and manage to run a household and parent children. Living sensibly and responsibly is not mutually exclusive to the non playfighters of the world!

Jux · 16/01/2018 20:54

I don't think you should stop play fighting, I think you should stop play fighting with someone you can't trust to stop qhen quits is called. I think you and he need to have a series of conversations about trust, use of force, buried anger or resentment so how you resolve issues, but mainly about trust.

Trashboat · 16/01/2018 20:59

Mabey talk about a few rules together and Mabey

Or MAYBE you know what I am getting at?

steff13 · 16/01/2018 21:06

If the slipper has a rubber sole, I think it's likely that he swatted it at you and didn't realize how hard it hit. Those things are hard, and they can sort of spring back.

You have to ask him why he continued after you'd agreed to stop, but it sounds to me like it was just playing and he got carried away, or thought he'd get you once more before the handshake (the "official" end of the fighting).

I may be mistaken but I don't think this is similar to a BDSM relationship, in that in that sort of a relationship parameters are agreed to before hand. This sounds like something that just developed. If you've sat down and said, "ok, no more roughhousing after we've mutually agreed to stop," and he went back on that, I think you have the right to be upset. If not, I think I'd forgive him, assuming he just got a bit carried away. And know better for next time. Only you can know if you trust him not to get carried away again.

GerdaLovesLili · 16/01/2018 21:13

Sorry, I won't do it again.

Weezol · 16/01/2018 21:15

Well, he broke the rules so some kind of forfeit is in order surely?

Original poster
SlipperShock · 16/01/2018 21:22

DP has been and got me a take away and then made a brew so all is forgiven Grin

OP posts:
FurCoatFurKnickers · 16/01/2018 21:25

God, me and my brother always used to lie about 'pax' and try to get another shot in when the other wasn't expecting it. One time he whacked me round the back of the head as I walked away and I fell onto the edge of the dining room table. 10 stitches in my forehead that one cost me! I couldn't wait for the opportunity to try and get him back for it (rugby tackled him into a wall a couple of weeks later causing a massive lump on the back of his head). We were 7 and 9 at that point though.

Nothing wrong with play fighting as adults but sometimes things get (accidentally) OTT and someone gets hurt. You need to decide with OH whether your play fights are worth the potential injuries.

WorraLiberty · 16/01/2018 21:26

And a spelling lesson to add to the patronising.

Brilliant.

Leigha3 · 16/01/2018 21:30

Sometimes guys just forget how much stronger they are, I think it can happen when being playful cuz it transports them back into the mindset of wrestling around with siblings and friends as kids.

picklemepopcorn · 16/01/2018 21:39

If you've never hit someone with a slipper, you wouldn't realise the flex makes it much worse. He will have had no idea how much it was going to hurt.

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