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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DP hit me with a slipper!

144 replies

SlipperShock · 16/01/2018 19:20

I've NC for this.

My fiance and I were messing about, 'play fighting' and we were pushing about etc. He stuck his arse out as if he were to fart so I took my slipper off and chased after him. I threw my slippers towards him but missed deliberately. He then threw them back. (All childish I know). Anyway he called it quits. I went to shake his hand, a way we call it quits.

He then smacks my bare arm, full force with the slipper. It really bloody hurt, made me cry and my arm went bright red. He's hit me so hard that he's left the slippers tread imprinted on my arm Angry

He's apologised and I know he's sorry but I'm bloody angry. First of all he called it quits but then to hit me with such force?

I know this is all very childish. But we do play fight often. I'm completely shocked at what he's done.

OP posts:
Tink2007 · 16/01/2018 19:33

He called it quits which was obviously a fake out.

I very much doubt he meant to hurt you. It’s deifnitely not something to be “bloody angry” about. Are you sure you’re not just angry that you fell for the fake “I quit”?

Original poster
SlipperShock · 16/01/2018 19:33

I know it wasn't malicious and that DP just got caught up in the moment. He wasn't trying to hurt me and I know when playing, things can go too far but he definitely used too much force.

He does have brothers so maybe that explains it.

A lot of you won't understand 'play fighting' or why we do it but hey it's fun (mostly) and there's some interesting research on it.

The comment about hoping we don't have children, fuck off. Not needed.

OP posts:
Harryrotter · 16/01/2018 19:33

In my experience (professional) , playfighting is used by those who want to get away with hurting their partner by calling it playing. Suggest to him that you don’t want to do it anymore and see what his reaction is.

BuzzKillington · 16/01/2018 19:33

Don't play fight. Sorted.

Someone always gets carried away.

throwcushions · 16/01/2018 19:36

DH and I play fight all the time! It's fun! We also have water fights and hide and jump out at each other. Nothing wrong with being in touch with your inner child! Ime one of us will accidentally hit the other too hard or in the wrong place every now and then. No big deal. Minor irritation, kiss and make up, these things happen and if it's clearly not malicious then I don't understand why you would be angry.

Original poster
SlipperShock · 16/01/2018 19:36

The whole 'fake quits' thing isn't what we do. When we call quits, we stop. Either one has had enough or hurt etc. We've been together 5 years and haven't gone back on it.

OP posts:
LadyBunnysWig · 16/01/2018 19:38

Hmm why have you posted this?
You don't want any advice...

Trashboat · 16/01/2018 19:38

I fucking detest play fighting. It ALWAYS ends in tears.

One person usually get hurt more than the other and it never ends up being funny.

I think it's a way for idiots to express themselves, when they don't know how to use words.

RadioGaGoo · 16/01/2018 19:39

Some people really do like to look down their noses at others, don't they. This is probably the most patronising thread I have ever read. My DH tickles me sometimes - maybe I should tell him to grow up and do the household accounts instead Grin

ThisLittleKitty · 16/01/2018 19:39

Well he obviously just got carried away this time. What else do you think it could be??

Tink2007 · 16/01/2018 19:40

FYI I don’t see anything wrong with the OP and her DP play fighting. Me and my DH have been known to do it though it has ended in tears before now 😂

Trashboat · 16/01/2018 19:41

My DH tickles me sometimes

Well if he hurts you, leaves an imprinted mark, and makes you cry, then yes, maybe you should get him to do the accounts instead

Trashboat · 16/01/2018 19:42

My DH tickles me sometimes - maybe I should tell him to grow up and do the household accounts instead

Fail on my part haha.

Littlechocola · 16/01/2018 19:42

Maybe you should both go to your rooms and think about what you’ve done.

What would you like him to do now?

Reallytired17 · 16/01/2018 19:42

I do kind of agree with trashboat

Notreallyarsed · 16/01/2018 19:42

This thread sounds bizarrely like an earlier conversation I had with my 3 & 4 year olds. Good grief OP.

DriggleDraggle · 16/01/2018 19:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

throwcushions · 16/01/2018 19:42

Trashboat - given that DH is a lawyer I find the play fighting preferable to using words Wink lighten up! If it's not for you that's fine but no need to make such sweeping generalisations about others on the basis of something harmless.

Butterymuffin · 16/01/2018 19:42

So you're telling us it's all fine, play fighting is good, it wasn't malicious, you always know when to stop. Except this time. Are you posting to reassure yourself? Is that what you wanted to hear?

Thequeenisdeadboys · 16/01/2018 19:43

Bit boring really, however, an appalling comment by iliketeabagging on first page.

Original poster
SlipperShock · 16/01/2018 19:43

I think what I'm more upset about is the fact we called it quits which he then broke. You may think of it as childish but it's something we do and not something we break. That doubled with the fact that it really bloody hurt has probably escalated it.

OP posts:
throwcushions · 16/01/2018 19:44

Well if you don't trust him to play fight then don't do it anymore.

DeStijl · 16/01/2018 19:45

My 2 and 5 year old have daily issues like this... Stop play fighting.

BashStreetKid · 16/01/2018 19:45

What's his explanation for carrying on when you'd called quits?

Reallytired17 · 16/01/2018 19:47

I’d actually be a bit disturbed by my parents running around squealing like a pair of eleven year olds so I’m with teabagging