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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DP hit me with a slipper!

144 replies

SlipperShock · 16/01/2018 19:20

I've NC for this.

My fiance and I were messing about, 'play fighting' and we were pushing about etc. He stuck his arse out as if he were to fart so I took my slipper off and chased after him. I threw my slippers towards him but missed deliberately. He then threw them back. (All childish I know). Anyway he called it quits. I went to shake his hand, a way we call it quits.

He then smacks my bare arm, full force with the slipper. It really bloody hurt, made me cry and my arm went bright red. He's hit me so hard that he's left the slippers tread imprinted on my arm Angry

He's apologised and I know he's sorry but I'm bloody angry. First of all he called it quits but then to hit me with such force?

I know this is all very childish. But we do play fight often. I'm completely shocked at what he's done.

OP posts:
SequinsOnEverything · 16/01/2018 19:59

We play fight and it has never in 12 years ended in tears. Neither of us has gotten hurt. For us it's like wrestling with tickling thrown in, certainly nothing aiming to hurt the other.

Just because you don't do something doesn't make it wrong. Some of us6 are just very in touch with our inner child!

DivisionBelle · 16/01/2018 20:01

OK, so he apologised. Did HE explain why he did it? What happened in his mind?

Have you told him why you are upset - the fact that it bloody hurt and he betrayed your trust?

Even if he did it as a trick, why full force? That doesn't sound like play.

SheGotBetteDavisEyes · 16/01/2018 20:05

I know one couple who find 'play fighting' hilarious. Mind you, they also think Mrs Brown's Boys is funny. I think they bought tickets for it once.

OP, speak with your DP about strict boundaries for your 'play fighting' sessions.

Bluntness100 · 16/01/2018 20:05

The whole 'fake quits' thing isn't what we do

Well it was this time. Sounds like hes starting to think of you like his brother. It's not sexy any more, if it ever was. He's play fighting like he would with his sibling. I'd also wonder if he wanted to hurt you.

Who started this whole play fighting in thr beginning.was it him?

grannytomine · 16/01/2018 20:08

as i say to my children when they do similar - this will end in tears! If I had a pound for every time I said that I would be a wealthy woman.

Wilburissomepig · 16/01/2018 20:08

Oh FFS. The kids aren't allowed to play fight in the school I work in because so many of them were getting really hurt under the guise of 'playing'.

Assuming you're both adults, maybe grow the fuck up.

Dustbunny1900 · 16/01/2018 20:09

There's nothing wrong with play fighting, just as there's nothing wrong with BDSM ..it's about trust. And you certainly can't trust him. Hit you hard enough to leave a print of the slippers?? And he didn't know what he was doing, riiiight Hmm. Bullshit.

TroubledTribble28 · 16/01/2018 20:11

If this is the first time it's happened in 5 years you could either give your DP the benefit of the doubt (he took it too far this one occasion) or ask him what the fuck he thought he was doing?
To every poster sneering and making unnecessary comments: have you never tickled your partners in a playful way? Like never? Do you shake hands after sex too? Confused Lighten up!

stopbeingadramallama · 16/01/2018 20:12

Complete fucking idiots😏

Dagnabit · 16/01/2018 20:12

Well, if you two carry on, I'm telling mum....

Brightredpencil · 16/01/2018 20:13

Exactly what @trashboat said.

And also "there's some interesting research on it". Seriously? You sound like you're trying to justify idiotic behaviour with pretentious pseudo intellectual twattery.

dontcallmelen · 16/01/2018 20:15

@brightred 😂😂

Rumpledfaceskin · 16/01/2018 20:16

Shegotbet your comment is hilarious. mrs browns boys Grin

user1492970817 · 16/01/2018 20:17

Maybe stop playing silly games that end with you getting hurt.

Trashboat · 16/01/2018 20:18

I know one couple who find 'play fighting' hilarious. Mind you, they also think Mrs Brown's Boys is funny. I think they bought tickets for it once.

Perfect. Throw Miranda into that too.

WorraLiberty · 16/01/2018 20:21

Some people really do like to look down their noses at others, don't they. This is probably the most patronising thread I have ever read.

Same and me and my DH don't even play fight!

Having said that, I'm not sure what the OP wants from this thread?

Unless she's new to MN, she should expect a fair few po-face replies.

Ellie56 · 16/01/2018 20:21
Hmm
throwcushions · 16/01/2018 20:21

Goodness me. You're all so negative! No wonder you don't enjoy a bit of light hearted play fighting! Grin

AnyFucker · 16/01/2018 20:21

Could you link to the "interesting research" on playfighting please

2018SoFarSoGreat · 16/01/2018 20:22

My DGS's play fight. It never ends well. They are generally given a warning that it will end in tears. They are 2 and 7.

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 16/01/2018 20:23

Never understood adults play fighting. As kids it always ended in tears, not much changed then.

Wilburissomepig · 16/01/2018 20:25

I don't really give a shit if anyone thinks I'm po faced. Why would I? Confused

Play fight all you like, but don't be surprised if it occasionally goes wrong.

MatildaTheCat · 16/01/2018 20:26

I always used this mantra to my dc:

‘No fighting. No biting. Play nicely.’

After the age of about five it was no longer necessary.

Aeroflotgirl · 16/01/2018 20:27

There is nothing wrong with play fighting, it's good that couples can have a laugh and be silly and have fun, but Mabey talk about a few rules together and Mabey have a particular word you both use when it's time to end it. Really some of you are so boring, so when you turn 18 you loose your sense of fun and humour🙄🙄🙄

Idontevencareanymore · 16/01/2018 20:28

Oh gosh I havent play fought/fighted since I was about 10!
Does he shut the door in Your face and hold the handle shut until you fall as well?

Now I like a laugh, but playfighting isn't really funny when you're playing with a person who could really inflict some damage. My husband is big and I'm wide but little Grin so we don't indulge beyond a playful slap and lighthearted throw of an object.

Just stop the playfighting. He's obviously taking it too far. And ask him why he thought it was acceptable! It's obvious it's a hard bottom slipper to leave a mark, you just dont hit people with things like that.