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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Inheritance - AIBU to have everything crossed for a windfall?

195 replies

UnravelMyMind · 10/01/2018 13:02

I have a namechanged for this because it may get very identifying...

Early last year my parental grandmother died. She left a small amount of money to me, and the rest of her estate to her two sons, one of whom is my dad . My dad hurriedly left the country 12 years ago to escape from HMRC so his share of the money was to be kept by his brother, who was going to send him an allowance every year.

In October my dad died of cancer, very suddenly. Neither me or his brother had had a lot to do with him for the previous 10 years, very long story but basically he's a compulsive liar) although we did go out and see him in the country he was living a few weeks before he died.

His brother has now sold his mothers house and so has doubled the amount of money he was due to inherit because he will no longer have to share it with his brother.

I do not feel comfortable asking his brother about this, hence I am driving myself mad thinking about it and hoping that it will occur to him to share some with myself as it's money he would not have had if it was not for the death of my father / his brother. Not all of it, it's an extra £150,000, but at least something...? £30k for example ?

OP posts:
Original poster
UnravelMyMind · 10/01/2018 13:36

I agree Martha, but I am not remotely tempted to try and go down the legal route anyway. It is more about doing the right thing than the legally correct thing, if that makes sense!
To me it seems obvious to share a bit of the extra money with me, however obviously I am rather biased!

OP posts:
Gingernaut · 10/01/2018 13:37

If your adoptive father dies without a will, you would be treated as if you are his biological child.

Viviennemary · 10/01/2018 13:38

I doubt you'll get anything. Presumably your Dad and uncle came to an arrangement where your Dad's share was given to your uncle to avoid taxes your Dad owes. In this case you are at the mercy of your uncle handing this money over to you. As for the sale of the house. Who was the owner of the house up until now.

Original poster
UnravelMyMind · 10/01/2018 13:39

I am named on my grandmother as well but my dad didn't leave until. Even though I ended up being adopted someone else I just refer to both of them as my dad, to complicate things further!

OP posts:
UnitedKungdom · 10/01/2018 13:39

You'll get etc nothing hoping for goodwill.

Get a solicitor and go down the legal route or stop thinking about it.

DriggleDraggle · 10/01/2018 13:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
UnravelMyMind · 10/01/2018 13:40

The arrangement about my grandmothers house was made by my grandmother, not her two sons

OP posts:
DrMarthaJones · 10/01/2018 13:40

It is more about doing the right thing than the legally correct thing, if that makes sense!

If your ex-uncle feels like giving you some money for some reason, he can do. But I wouldn't count on it if I were you. Your ex-grandmother left you something, at least.

DrMarthaJones · 10/01/2018 13:41

Get a solicitor and go down the legal route or stop thinking about it

There is no legal route. OP has no legal entitlement to anything at all.

TheDailyMailIsADisgustingRag · 10/01/2018 13:42

Oh sorry, so your biological dad is the one who died, but you were adopted by someone else?

That’s quite different. I don’t know if you’re entitled to anything.

I’d definitely speak to a solicitor. This is a bit too complicated for mumsnet I think!

Brakebackcyclebot · 10/01/2018 13:43

If I'm following this, your grandmother left all her estate to your dad's brother because of HMRC debts owed by your dad. She left instructions to your dad's brother to distribute to your dad after her death through essentially gifts. Your dad has now died.

It sounds as though the money does actually belong to your uncle, who was simply following an instruction.

JessieMcJessie · 10/01/2018 13:43

You absolutely need legal advice here. You’d be crazy not to get it. Once you have worked out what, if anything, is rightfully yours, you can give some back to your uncle if you feel he deserves it.

Viviennemary · 10/01/2018 13:44

Just seen the little aside that you were adopted by your mother's new husband. This makes all the difference I would assume this means that you haven't any rights to inherit unless specifically mentioned in a will.

marywasneeavirgin · 10/01/2018 13:44

I think unless your grandmother left specific instructions and named you as a beneficiary there won't be a windfall. The man who died in the Far East is not your legal relative.

Please let us know how the meeting goes though.

JackieReacher · 10/01/2018 13:44

MarthaJones - you're simplifying massively. OP has no entitlement to her bio father's estate under the rules of intestacy, but without sight of grandma's will, it's not correct she isn't entitled to anything. She says she's named in grandma's will so entirely possible that bio father had a life interest held on trust by uncle, reversion to OP. THat is as speculative of course as your assertion she has nothing and no entitlement to anything

Original poster
UnravelMyMind · 10/01/2018 13:45

Thanks Driggle
I am relying on my uncle to do what I presume is the right thing, or even if you just occurs to him to do the right thing, as he's not very proactive.
Written in black and white on the thread, it does sound a lot more like I ought to go for legal advice. I don't want to do that. While some of the money would make me extremely happy, and make a hell of a difference to my life, I don't want to make things nasty by involving solicitors or trying to put pressure on.
I am seeing my uncle this weekend so hopefully it will be fine, it's just that I am driving myself mad this week thinking will he, wont he, will he, won't he...

OP posts:
nauticant · 10/01/2018 13:45

You are getting a stream of gibberish here OP. As you say, the perils of posting in AIBU.

If you think your uncle is a decent sort of person, meet him with an open mind and ask him how in his view he thinks this should be handled. Try to make sure you ask about this if he's not forthcoming, don't let this matter fade into the background because of embarrassment.

If he refers to any other documents, in addition to the will, that entitles him to your father's share, ask him whether you might have your own copies. Good luck with this tricky situation.

NurseButtercup · 10/01/2018 13:46

I'm sorry for your loss.

Go and speak to your Uncle. If you're not prepared to go the legal route then you're definitely at his mercy.

Sadly, when relatives die, any inheritance money left changes people either for the better or the worse. I've had the misfortune to witness the terrible behaviour of my relatives when my grandparents and my parents died.

All I can say is good luck and be prepared to be disappointed if he says no and you choose not to fight via a solicitor.

Flowers
Original poster
UnravelMyMind · 10/01/2018 13:47

BrakeBack you are almost right! There is also something in my grandmothers Will about my dad having half of her estate, but it has to be kept by my uncle (in trust, maybe?) Who then will send my dad an allowance. I can't remember the terminology!

OP posts:
DrMarthaJones · 10/01/2018 13:48

She's not getting gibberish at all. There is no tricky situation. She has no entitlement to any money unless specifically mentioned in a will.

OP, no solicitor can do anything for you here. You are not legally related to the deceased, his brother, or their mother. You have no entitlement of any kind to any money unless there is a will.

Original poster
UnravelMyMind · 10/01/2018 13:49

Thanks Nauticant!

OP posts:
ShellyBoobs · 10/01/2018 13:50

Is your uncle a decent person? He may share with you if so. But I'd start looking at the legals and also be prepared that HMRC may end up with it

Your question is answered by your second sentence.

Of course he’s not a decent person!

He’s complicit in helping OP’s father to evade taxes, going by the fact that HMRC were on the case,

DrMarthaJones · 10/01/2018 13:50

MarthaJones - you're simplifying massively. OP has no entitlement to her bio father's estate under the rules of intestacy, but without sight of grandma's will, it's not correct she isn't entitled to anything. She says she's named in grandma's will so entirely possible that bio father had a life interest held on trust by uncle, reversion to OP. THat is as speculative of course as your assertion she has nothing and no entitlement to anything

I am not. OP has a copy of the ex grandmothers will, so your point is irrelevant.

CotswoldStrife · 10/01/2018 13:51

Sorry for your loss OP, I think I remember some of your other threads about your dad.

So - your dad did receive a definite bequest from his mother's will. You are not sure if it was to be held in trust. If you are adopted by your stepfather then I don't think you will inherit from your biological father - if he has no other children then the remaining bequest (which will now include the property money) will go to his siblings IIRC.

Although I do think HMRC will take a keen interest in the estate!

Topseyt · 10/01/2018 13:52

Bugger off with the "Wow, just wow" crap unless you are a solicitor well versed in the laws of intestacy along with the other potential complicating factors the OP has mentioned.

It could potentially be OP's money. Not her uncle's (I think she is talking about her Dad's brother anyway, but could be confused). That is why she needs a solicitor - to help her ascertain this, before all of the money disappears or is spent.

OP, I hope you find the answers soon. However, I do agree with those saying that your phraseology of "Hoping for a Windfall" is not the wisest choice. It makes you sound grabby, which I don't believe you are.