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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Why would anyone do this?

450 replies

Puppyduppydoo · 31/12/2017 22:41

Name changed for this thread.

I’ve just had FB message from a complete stranger who maintains she has been having an affair with my husband. She hasn’t, the message was full of totally incorrect details including dates and times when I know he was with me.

They had connected on linked-in but have never met. Why would somebody do this, particularly on NYE?

OP posts:
froginapond · 01/01/2018 00:18

Yes plenty of people have connections with people they don't really know.

But woman don't send messages to the wives of men they have on there - if they don't know him AT ALL.

Wouldn't happen.

CheekyFuckersAreEntertaining · 01/01/2018 00:19

@Puppyduppydoo well clearly the woman is telling the truth and your husband is having an affair and staying with her all night long.

The man in the bed with you every night is in fact an elaborate ruse, a model of your husband made from pillows and a Halloween mask. His hair? It's your furry hat placed cleverly to resemble your DH.

How did you not notice? 😂😂

froginapond · 01/01/2018 00:22

@cheekyfuckers

Stop being ridiculous.

CheekyFuckersAreEntertaining · 01/01/2018 00:25

The only thing more ridiculous is believing a total stranger who says your own husband has been staying all night long with her, when he was with you at the time. Either she is lying or you have slipped into insanity and have only imagined your husband sleeping beside you.

ColaCube22 · 01/01/2018 00:25

She sounds utterly crazy. I would just be careful and keep the evidence that she's contacted you making these wild claims until you are sure it doesn't turn into harassment.
I'm not familiar with the site that you are talking about, does it have your home address on it as a the business address if he works from home?
There's crazy and their is dangerous crazy, it's hard to tell what she is from what you say has happened.
Who knows why people do these things.

Hebenon · 01/01/2018 00:26

Just tell her not to contact you again and block. She sounds, erm, odd to say the least.

Original poster
Puppyduppydoo · 01/01/2018 00:26

You’re the one being ridiculous frog

OP posts:
Jobjobjob · 01/01/2018 00:27

It's a PROFESSIONAL connection site, not a chatting site! I cannot ever imagine getting in to "i"ve got a cockerpoo, have you"

It's so far removed from my personal and private life, I just don't get it becoming personal!

LolaTheDarkdestroyer · 01/01/2018 00:31

Sorry but it sounds a bit dodgy, why would she do this to some random she had never met?! Why him? I think k you are In denial to be fair and I would be doing some serious digging.

NoMudNoLotus · 01/01/2018 00:33

@arethereanyleftatall it happened to me too

Original poster
Puppyduppydoo · 01/01/2018 00:34

Seriously Lola how am I in denial about my husband sleeping next to me every night?

OP posts:
froginapond · 01/01/2018 00:35

Yes of COURSE I am the one being ridiculous.

This woman does not know the OP's husband at ALL. They have never had any communication whatsoEVER, and she has just randomly popped up from NOWHERE and decided to message the OP claiming to have been fucking her husband.

Jeeeez, naive or what? Wink Wake the fuck up!

The OP's husband DEFINITELY knows this woman.

Not saying there is definitely an affair been going on (though that is possible,) but he definitely knows her.

He fucking knows her. I am telling you.

Howsthings1234 · 01/01/2018 00:35

So weird!! Clearly someone's idea of a sick joke. She must be very sad and lonely to want to send horrible messages like that. Hope you are ok OP. I would block and ignore.

Original poster
Puppyduppydoo · 01/01/2018 00:36

I’ve already said he knows her. I said it in my OP. Calm the fuck down love.

OP posts:
froginapond · 01/01/2018 00:38

This reply has been deleted

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froginapond · 01/01/2018 00:38

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2018IsGoingToBeMyYear · 01/01/2018 00:40

OP I would just go to bed and ignore this thread and also the woman who's contacted you.

An ex friend of DH got his mate to ring up and pretend she was some girl my DH got pregnant in a vain attempt to break us up as he didn't like me & felt like he was losing his friend... he did lose his friend after that stunt!

DoJo · 01/01/2018 00:40

For those saying they know everyone on their LinkedIn- are you all self employed? Because I use it as a networking tool, making connections with people in the same industry as me and getting in touch with potential clients as well as letting up with people I actually know. There are probably quite a few people on there who I don't know, but could tell you a few 'small talk' facts about me from our interactions.

2018IsGoingToBeMyYear · 01/01/2018 00:42

@froginapond are you drunk? Stop being such a shit stirrer.

Love is a very everyday name to call people in Yorkshire btw.

gillybeanz · 01/01/2018 00:43

I've been married 25 years and have never had any reason not to trust my dh.
I'm 99% sure h'ed never cheat, I'd be very wary and checking it all out.
can't do any harm if it's innocent.

froginapond · 01/01/2018 00:43

Amazing how the OP posted with suspicions and worries about what has happened, and when people say 'yeah you are right to be concerned,' all of a sudden, the people saying this are being berated and mocked.

Why bother fucking posting if you are gonna shut people down who say stuff you don't care to hear? Secretly worried that people are right? Hmm

I am telling you, he knows her a LOT more than he is letting on.

froginapond · 01/01/2018 00:44

Do one @2018

Steeley113 · 01/01/2018 00:44

Someone I know had something very similar. She even checked her husbands bank statements to cross reference the dates she was telling her they’d met and it didn’t tally... 6 months down the line it came out they had actually been having an affair all along and he left the wife and went and lived with the woman.

CheekyFuckersAreEntertaining · 01/01/2018 00:44

The woman who stalked my DH knew him. Or had for a few months.m as a teenager. She hadn't seen nor heard from him in 14 years but hey, it didn't stop her from claiming all sorts about what they (and I) had been up to simply by reading through my Facebook. Of course she didn't think to choose dates when her stories could have been even slightly plausible. The judge didn't buy it either.

Some people really are this batshit and choose an almost (or sometimes complete) stranger to become obsessed with for no reason at all.

MissConductUS · 01/01/2018 00:45

I shouldn’t have posted on here.

The problem is that your post ticked all the boxes - potential infidelity, crazy women, social media, etc. It was like a bird feeder in winter.

Your husband is fine, your marriage is fine. You've just had an encounter with someone with mental health issues. It happens all the time.