to still be upset about the unwanted touching my friends and I got last night

[ilovewelshrarebit123]

We're three late forties women who went out for our annual Christmas drinks last night.

As it was the last Friday before Christmas we knew it would be busy and people would be drunk, but we couldn't meet any other night so went with it.

We weren't out looking for men, we just wanted a catch up, a giggle and a good gossip!

In the space of five hours all three of us were inappropriately touched by men. I had my breast touched by a man who decided I had something on my black top so he wanted to 'rub' it off. There was nothing on my top and he was told not to touch me. I was called a 'miserable bitch'.

My friend had her bottom touched twice by the same man. This was while he passed by her and she asked him politely not to touch her.

Other friend was pushed into a corner and grabbed round her waist. Again he was asked not to touch her which was met with indignation that she was a boring cow!

If we managed to find a seat to chat men would tell us we were boring, smile etc

Why do we put up with this shit? Why do some men think they have the right to do and say crap like this to three women out for drink and chat!

All three of us just shrugged it off at the time, but we've since had a text convo agreeing it's just sad and not on.

Anyway, rant over and merry Christmas everyone!

You're right it's unacceptable.

Men just don't get that we put up with this All the time, it will only stop when other men call out their mates / other men & tell them their behaviour is unacceptable. We still seem to be dark ages about sexual harassment and all the stuff with Weinstein et all hasn't made an impact in the average woman's life.

I had two friends come to visit me a couple of weeks ago who I’d not seen for ages. We’re similar ages to you and your friends. We met for lunch in a nice pub on a wet Monday afternoon and as soon as we sat down we were accosted by two blokes who ‘couldn’t believe their luck’. I was fricking livid that a) we’d been bothered at all by a pair of leery twats and b) they’d given my friends a poor impression of my home town. They asked me not to say anything or I’d have gone off on one. But why should we have to put up that crap at all?

No, that would be seriously irritating

That's why I hate going out to clubs or bars. It is unacceptable, no reason why women have to put up with that rubbish. Good on you for telling them not to touch yiu, what gives them that right to yiur body. They are not tge types I would want to go out with anyway.

Nothing has changed. Groped pretty much daily on the tube as a KID (12/13 onwards), and still groped in pubs and clubs now old enough to have twenty year old DCs. It's shocking and depressing.

I’d be upset and angry too.

And I’m wondering how long if will be before someone comes along to suggest that

1. You are overreacting
2. You deserved it because you were “ rude “ to ask these men not to touch you
3. It happens to men too
4. Men are poor misunderstood creatures who can’t read women’s “ signals “
5. You should be willing to put up with it for the honour of being allowed to drink in public
6. NAMALT so you have no right to be annoyed.
7. It’s not as bad as rape so you have no right to be annoyed.

Etc etc etc

Sleazebags.

Oh and I forgot - someone will come along and ask what you were wearing or suggest it’s never happened to them because they don’t dress provocatively.

We should have a bingo card for sexual assault. It’s so fucking predictable .

just to even things up got my balls cupped at the bar by a very pissed women on her works do last week

Horrible behaviour. Sad times when you can’t even have a drink with friends without it being spoilt by some sleazy men who think it’s their right to act like that! I’m growling for you!

Do you imagine the bar had CCTV? If you know the time it happened, and it happened to three of you, and you'd recognise his face I'd seriously consider talking to the police.

At least ring the bar and check. It was repeated sexual assault. He needs to be spoken to. I have zero tolerance for this shit- it's so insidious, so constant, it means you have to be constantly on your guard.

Do you think that 'evens things up' rwalker?

Any bloke who tried to touch my boobs would have got a slap before his hand even made contact with me. Do I think you and your friends were very restrained.

I went out with girlfriends for Christmas dinner last night, and in the short walk between the car park and the restaurant, 4 blokes decided to try and start a conversation, me not replying and just walking on past them just seem to spur them on more. I'm bloody gorgeous "apparently" and an ungrateful cow for not appreciating the compliment. Twats.

that definitely makes it all even :|

Kr1st1na always, so predictable and boring. Also ‘well, I would have just kicked him in the balls, you should have just done that’.

It’s a total disgrace OP, YANBU.

Have you ever had your balls cupped by a man rwalker? Just curious.

Fucking disgusting behaviour OP YANBU.

A few of us went out last weekend to a pub/club. It's was vile. All the blokes standing on the edge of the dance floor watching and leering at all the women made me feel sick.

We didn't stay long that's for sure

I’m contemplating of finding some small innocuous looking electric cattle prod or even building my own device. For any unwanted contact, I feel I ought to be entitled to respond with a suitably high voltage shock.

Disgusting behaviour why can’t women go out without men thinking they have a right to our bodies or our space.
I’m not saying men can never approach a group of women but if they are told thanks but no thanks why can’t they just accept it good grace.
Also no mans hand belongs on any part of my body without an invitation.
I’m sorry your night was ruined!

Temptress - brilliant!! please do this and send me one (keeping on the right side of the law of course - or maybe the law should be changed to allow a harmless bit of self defence!)
It would be amazing if women could wear something that delivered a bit of a shock to the gropers ...

I saw this on a page I follow and it about sums it up for me.
There also a thread running on the feminist group called what men have called me and why. it's depressing reading but very eye-opening

Fucking men and booze. I hate this combination! I hate it. And I'm usually the first to say, "You're overreacting."
Alcohol allows for really shitty behaviour on everyone's part but especially men.
I was out walking home from a friend's house yesterday. We had a Christmas cuppa with the kids at hers. I was going home along the river, past a string of waterfront pubs (really great venues, beautiful views, but I NEVER go to these pubs because of all of the drunk MEN acting like assholes at all hours of the day).

Yesterday evening around 6pm, a group of blokes raised their glasses to say 'Cheers' and one shouted out, 'May the pussy be loose, open, and wet' to which they all responded with good, drunken merriment. I just hate how my daughter understood what they were saying but didn't understand why they were saying this. She had SO many questions. It was so demoralizing and just horrible. I fucking hate men when they act like this.
We don't go around with a pint in one hand and our other hand pulling on their dicks remarking, "You had a stain on it, luv. Just thought I'd wipe it."

I was at the bar last night and a man broke off from his friends and asked if I wanted a drink. I said no thanks, not unless you want to buy my boyfriend one too haha. Should have been the end of but instead he grabbed me round the waist and told me to ditch DP and go home with him instead. WTAF?? Wish I could say I came up with a witty response but instead I told him to fuck off and I moved to another part of the bar. Pisses me right off.

Of course YANBU, I would have been furious. It's completely unacceptable and it makes me feel sick that some men still have the fucking nerve to behave like this.

The night tube a few weeks ago felt really threatening. Was on way home with a friend and our DH’s. A pissed and lech-y younger man was harassing my friend and kept putting his feet up onto her and leaning forward and touching her knee. She diffused it with jokes and requests to stop, which he eventually did, but it felt like he could easily get aggressive. He was with male friends who looked embarrassed but didn’t stop it. Awful.