CF husband. Can you beat this?

[MatildaTheCat]

DH has an inbuilt distrust of internet shopping so when I placed my Ocado Christmas order he became very agitated and insisted that all the fresh vegetables be removed as he wished to choose them himself.

OK, I say. If you wish to visit the supermarket on the busiest day of the year to buy exactly the same items that would have been carried straight into our kitchen then who am into argue? Vegetables were removed.

This morning, on his way to the gym he suggested I might like to go to Waitrose this evening to purchase the Christmas fucking vegetables whilst he enjoys a drink at the pub. After he’s finished playing golf.

I have explained in good Anglo Saxon English that this will not be happening. Oh, and it’s his family coming, not mine.

AIBU to suggest he is the CF of the day?

Thanks for the update!

YANBU but to be fair to your husband 95% (not exaggerating) of my Waitrose online orders come with food either expiring the day after or on the same day. My last order had 14 packs of mince which expired that day. This is with all my fresh food!

My delightful H once told me that clearly I had no taste when choosing his mother’s christmas presents as she always returned them (this was after 15 years of marriage). I was so Cross that I told him I would NEVER buy hers again and it was up to him to sort and that she anyways returned all presents whoever bought them to get the money!🙄 Anyway Christmas Day came and MIL was presented with ‘his’ gift! She proceeded to turn her noise up, looked at me and asked ‘would I mind if she returned it.’ I said I didn’t care what she did as her son had chosen it because anything I had chosen was crap and not to her taste anyway! My husband was furious and shot daggers at me for the rest of the day!!!! Oh and BTW I still don’t buy her presents🤣

Waitrose dates are shocking. I went in on the 21st to buy sausages and sausage meat as I prefer their recipe to the Tesco one. Everything on display was Best Before Dec 23rd. Who on earth buys chipolatas and sausage meat on the 21st to eat before Christmas Day?

Next year he will be heavily invested in the xmas food delivery. Hand the whole thing over to him as he is such an expert.

studentwife Jolly well done!!!

I’m just loving these updates!!!!

Howling at that song! Thanks for putting a smile on my face OP!!!!!!

There better be soo many presents under that tree

Cf indeed.
Please update.

I’m so glad you stuck to your guns OP although am pretty impressed by the number of DHs on here cooking Christmas dinners! My DH can barely make toast let alone cook any kind of meal although to be fair it isn’t likely to matter since he is always at work and although I am a full time OU student and SAHM I am physically in the house to do these things and he is not. Though occasionally I do wonder in the evenings where my hour of sitting watching tv is when I’m folding laundry

I went to marksandspencer at 9.30pm.
Place was deserted.
Shelves were well stocked....
Apart from total absence of sprouts and ready to roast potatoes.
Fuck it.
I'm going back tomorrow.

(Actually I DID buy some sprouts but they were chocolate ones!)

So he still hasn't bought veg?! You need to add some nice toiletries to the list for yourself.

Just realised I am married to aCF! (Well actually I did already know that!) I booked our Tesco delivery weeks ago. We’re going to my ILs ( as we do every year, but that’s another story!!) and we are asked to bring booze and some nice cheese. I ordered loads of wine and ale and a few cheeses. Noooo, says DH, you always choose everything. I like to browse, I want to choose the cheese, says he. Ok, says I, I will remove cheese from the order. Shop arrives yesterday. No cheese as per DH instructions. Oh, I’ve not got time to buy cheese, says DH, we’ll just have to stop at Tesco on Xmas eve en route to my parents. (Meaning we would have to take DCs into circle of hell with us!)
So, like a fool, like a fool, as I was going out to buy diesel, I braved circle of hell to buy cheese! (Same cheese I had originally included in my order!!) Oh yes, very nice cheese, says DH on my return, that’ll do nicely! Yes, says I, would have done just as nicely if delivery man had brought it into my kitchen and I had not had to spend 45 mins in hell buying it!! 😡

Amazing CF on a grand scale

I was in M & S at about 12. It was not so busy, standard Saturday busy.
There was still loads of stuff on the shelves. Most of the customers seemed to be Hindus (I know a lot of people in our local Hindu community, which is small) buying turkeys.
The lady on the checkout said that they had huge queues when the doors first opened but after that it’s been busy but not hideous.

I'm very impressed OP! Well done for making the CF do the shopping. Merry Christmas.

I love what Waitrose call the white aubergines'"snowbergines"!

You revived a zombie thread for that?

Weirdly enjoyable zombie revival. I was reading through the thread, wondering what could have revived it. I was imagining all sorts of outcomes for the OP, maybe the start of an Easter Sunday lunch re-run.

Funnily enough, snowbergines wasn’t on my list

Same here, EduCated

(plus a great snigger at shaggy )

I commented on this thread at the time but missed the shaggy . 👍 on the zombie revival.

why is this thread trending?

I weirdly enjoyed reading this zombie and reminiscing because I was in labour through most of it having started contracting doing our own Xmas shop on a hellish Sainsbury's on the Friday afternoon after my waters had gone. DH kept joking about us getting a year's worth of free groceries if I gave birth in the aisle and I was finding it increasingly less funny

Oh how seriously disappointing. Crap unzombie.

I was expecting to get another Chapter - titled Matilda’s DH’s next ‘Bright Idea Gone Bad’

Not some comment about what Waitrose lamely call their aubergines in December. That’s a ‘groan’ from a Christmas Cracker.

Has @MatildaTheCat forgiven him yet? Was there a New Year’s fruit salad bustbuo? Have I shamelessly tagged the OP in the hope she returns? Yes. Yes I have.