Christmas present buying

[Liz876]

I probably know the answer to this but Aibu to keep letting other people, who constantly feel the need to tell me how much they've spent on their kids for Christmas make me doubt myself if I've bought enough for my own kids. My Dh thinks I am and that I should just smile and nod along when people do this.

Don't get me wrong I've had the odd conversation with friends about what our kids have asked for but I have a couple of friends in particular who are Christmas obsessed, who spend a fortune (which is fine it's their choice) but then go one step further and have sat and rhymed off to me every single present they have bought their children and told me to the penny how much they've spent.

At first I didn't really care because firstly it's their choice and secondly I was happy with what I'd bought for my own children. But now I'm doubting myself. I don't usually post on here about how much I spend on Christmas but to put it into perspective I have three children and have spent around £400 each on gifts for them, plus new clothes, shoes etc. My Dh feels this is enough and despite us being able to spend more we genuinely can't think of anything else they would like so we'd just be buying for buying's sake. My eldest has a mixture of designer clothes (not extortionate top end prices though) perfume, trainers, gift vouchers, etc. Middle child has got an Xbox plus games and the lots of smaller presents like smellies, make up, hair products and then my youngest has got a small tablet, hot wheels garage, imaginext toys, lego, etc etc. They also get plenty of presents from their grandparents, aunts, uncles etc so the house is full come Christmas Day. Rationally i know they have enough and like I said we could spend more but I don't want to spoil them too much, and have instead put money aside for trips out over Christmas i.e. a pantomime, meal out, trampoline park etc. I know my kids will get so much more out of these sort of things so why am I stressing? Ahh!!!!

latest iPhone for their DAD well he sounds spoilt

£400 is way more than I would spend.

I have 2 dc (9 and 4) and have spent about £100/110 each.

This is just my money but not sure ex h will have bought anything!

Crikey! I suppose it's all about priorities and disposable income. Mine get 12 carefully chosen gifts for about £100. We go away for a couple of nights between Xmas and new year in a premier inn and I'd rather spend money on giving them a nice break with treats than making Xmas day such a massive spend fest. We also spend money on nice food and a local theatre trip.
I don't know anyone who spends £400 or buys 50 gifts. It's not my thing, each to their own.

Ooops, predictive text fail. Meant latest iPhone for their DD

What the fecking planet are you on...£400 per child...that's laughable,your just wanting to deliberately upset people...if you have that much spare money do some good with it,like donate to a homeless charity ,rather than than indulge your spoilt children some more

Vulgar, vulgar, vulgar.
I do find MN amazing. I was brought up to not discuss money as frankly it is very vulgar.

Yep op, you come across as vulgar wrapping it up as 'oh no have I not spent enough on my kids?' Angst. I've a teenage son. I don't feel the need to boast at how much I've spent on him. Not when people are struggling to put food on the table.

I really don’t think that most parents spend £100s.

We have a toddler- he has a £10 trainset from a charity shop.

The teenager has a £40 jumper and I will spend about £10-£15 on stocking stuff.

Most people I know on normal to semi decent salaries will spend a similar amount

The fact is, once they become teens then £400 doesn't actually go that far. Not when you're paying £40 for a Morphe palette, £25 for Jack Wills underwear, or £100 for Fenty Puma Creepers

But even if insist on buying that stuff you can haven’t even touched half your £400 budget.

But, if you can afford it why on earth wouldn't you buy your teen a couple of really lovely items that they have drooled over all year? I get a lot of pleasure from indulging them a bit every now and again

I get pleasure from seeing her blossom from having a job and buying that kind of stuff for herself. She learns that to get nice but frivolous things she needs to work hard.

Well our two also have a little job too.

So I get double the pleasure. Pleasure from being able to treat them + pleasure from seeing them being able to treat themselves.

It's a win/win

What's "rhymed off"?

Not when you're paying £40 for a Morphe palette, £25 for Jack Wills underwear, or £100 for Fenty Puma Creepers.

Those would be main presents in our house. About £100-150 per child total including stocking. One of my DC wants money too, but that will only be to top up to what has been spent on the other DC.

That's bonkers. My teen will get £80 cash plus some 'new socks and books' type gifts that probably cost another £25. My toddler has got a range of lovely toys, sone second hand, for about £30 in total.

This is normal to me and within my friendship group luckily! I can't imagine having a spare £1200 to spend on kids presents

Way to much ... frankly you are not doing them or yourself any favours in the long run.
I’m not comvinced you are not bragging anyway.
We could spend that on our dc if we wanted, but it’s obscene.

How often do you go to church to celebrate Jesus’ other important celebrations?

I don’t know how much i’ve spent exactly, around £100 to £150.
I agree that experiences make people happier than stuff though.
It’s like sea water.
The more you have the thirstier you get

I suspect Your kids are not old teens yet anyway. 15 max.
“Trust funds government set up” were 2012 earliest.

2002 sorry typo

It is just incredibly crass at a time when so many are struggling to say that £400 won't go very far for your children as if they are some sort of golden species.

I literally haven't bought anything for DC3 (10 months). She has all her older siblings old toys, doesn't need clothes or equipment and I'm going to wrap some little played with baby toys to give the illusion to the older 2 that F.C. has been. She doesn't know and won't care. She will enjoy the boxes and paper instead!

We must be super stingy. A reasonable priced joint pressie, maybe £50 and some other bits, books and stocking fillers aside. Relatives will give too. That's loads IMO. They don't need bikes or scooters this year, thank goodness.

I would never dream of spending £400 on each of them. When they are teenagers I will explain we can't afford it and tough basically.

Mindless consumerism at it's worst!

I could afford it, but I think it's obscene, sets a dangerous precedent for expensive tastes, and frankly the money is better in my pension.

I used to spend about £1000 - £1500 per child each Xmas, but then I realised I'm just feeding the capitalist machine, which isn't nice, and also it's all waste isn't it? Plastic into the oceans.

Now we just give books and music lessons. And we are vegans now too. So, I feel much happier with things all round really.

Is it a bit windy up there on the moral high ground Twin?

People have different budgets and different priorities [shrugs]

I haven't claimed to be on any kind of moral high ground so I am not sure why you are trying to make personal attacks.

I just said that it wasn't the norm to spend £400 on children at Christmas. I also don't think that pointing out that £400 does indeed go a fair way is claiming any kind of moral ground.

You have no idea of my budget or priorities